Today is the day i wasn't lying when i told you i couldn't take it anymore. Please don't look back and torment yourself for not seeing it and don't sit there and pretend you care to capitalize on my death; be honest with yourselves.

Mom, i know you always did the best you could. You were always my hero in life and know i always saw your strength. You are what got me this far in life and i'm so sorry i couldn't be more strong like you. I love you; you always were and always will be my best friend. I will eternally rest better knowing my last words to you were of how much i love you. 

Dad, i know that we had our troubles and i'm sorry for all those times i accused you of not loving me anymore, i know you were hurt by my words and just know i love you. Thank you for trying and never giving up on me; i'm sorry i gave up on you.

My new Mom and Sisters, I'm sorry for all the times i made it feel like i hated you, it wasn't you it was my inability to accept you. I love you guys.

Sissy; we fought we hated each other but we were each others biggest fans. You're my other hero because you're just  like mommy. Please don't blame yourself of sit there picking apart our arguments because even though you told me you wish i was never born, i know you didn't really mean it. You're going to make the best mother someday and your day is coming; promise.

Bro, don't regret not spending time with m or us losing touch; i know you have a life and a family and you're always going to be my first best friend. Thick as thieves and i hope dad tells all your daughters how much you loved playing barbies.

Grandma and Grandpa, i was always your girl; please remember me like that and know i'm waiting for you with Aunt Kara. I know you believe i Jesus with every fiber of your being; i'm with him now and my pain is finally gone.

I know i'll live on through you; please celebrate me in all the ways i wish i could have celebrated life. Don't follow me, don't shut down; keep fighting. I know it's selfish to say that because i couldn't; but that isn't important now.

Hope i'm not gone, be angry and hate me and be sad; grieve but please don't forget me. That's my biggest fear; that i wasn't good enough for any of you. 

I was fighting demons you couldn't imagine and that's okay. But i'm at peace writing this. For the first time i feel alive, i'll be eternally with you now and one day we'll see each other again.

I'm happy all my words to you were good ones and that i got to hug you and my niece one more time. 

Love Always, 

Your daughter, sister, niece, granddaughter and friend

I'm sorry i've always been so selfish and my biggest regret will always be causing any of you pain.

goodbye. 

After the bitter lies and betrayal caused by Sebastian’s unfaithfulness, Gracelynn takes off and leaves her life she’s built with him behind. After being disowned from her family who now live three thousand miles away, she has no money and nowhere to go. Gracelynn had to figure something out and figure it out quick.

Jump forward five years and the young, innocent and naïve girl she was is long gone. Replacing modest clothes for salacious lingerie; Racy was now a high profile New York stripper that only the wealthy could afford. It wasn’t easy going from living on the streets to her penthouse that was supplied by a private client. Her bad situation turned worse when she ran away from the hospital bruised and bleeding on the inside and out. From being attacked and grabbed In sketchy towns and hole in the wall clubs to nearly getting herself involved with a pimp; Gracelynn hardened her loving heart and let almost no one in; she couldn’t if she wanted to survive.

With her life finally in order, complete with a body guard; Racy had no plans to let anyone take the life she made for herself away from her. But just like any time anything is going good in her life, things go into a downward spiral when her old life catches up to her. Threatening to destroy everything she’s accomplished, she shuts down emotionally to cope and stay strong against the very things that destroyed her youth when she was eighteen years old.

Racy will be forced to confront the painful and traumatic past she spent five years building walls to shut out. The memories she spent fleeing threatened to consume her once more, but not without a fight. If anyone was expecting the sweet and innocent yet sarcastic Gracelynn she used to be, they were in for a tough awakening.

Living on the streets, taking her clothes off for money and having men attack and grab at her nightly changed her. The old Gracelynn, the one who let people push her around and desperately wanted to please everyone was gone; she was never coming back.

No words and no actions can make amends for what Sebastian did, for what his actions caused. Nothing could change how she now feels about the husband she once loved. She trusted him, he was unfaithful. She gave him everything and he took it, leaving her nothing left. 

All he wants after all this time is her back. All she wants after five years is a divorce. Time has changed them both and only time will tell who will be the one to get what they desire most.

They meet by chance; Paul was sitting on the railing of the bridge when Phoebe sees him, going out there for the same reason. 

Surviving the car crash that killed her parents when she was nine, her brother took her in and beat her as a daily punishment. 

Estranged from his family, it was his fault his baby sister was now dead. 

He's filled with doubt, she's at peace with her choice. 

Being blunt, she asks if he wants to jump together, she lived a lonely life and it would be nice if she didn't die alone; the thought makes him second guess his decision to come out to the bridge. 

He makes her an offer:First day of summer is in three days, they make a bucket list and spend the summer doing them and then they decide the first day of fall; not before then. He offers her a place to live when she refuses to live at home, she tells him that’s a recipe to be tortured in a basement, but he persuades her to do it anyway. 

They make a list of twenty-five things that they can actually accomplish, the last one being to commit suicide. 

He refuses to help her with number six; to have sex. 

She can't help him accomplish number twenty-four; to fall in love. 

With limits set, she moves in and together they make plans to cross of twenty-three of their items together; a last and dying hope that maybe one summer can change your life. 

Maybe all you need is two people on the verge of suicide and and an insane idea to give each other the will to live. 

I’m on my second beer when he sits down beside me at the crowded bar.

At first, I don’t acknowledge him, because I’m way too busy staring at the picture of JewBoy87’s penis on my phone and wondering when my life came to this.

Firstly, who sexts pictures of their genitals at eight p.m. on a Friday night? Someone with no life, who has nothing better to do than come home from work, make dinner for himself, before stripping down and taking photos at various angles of his very erect, very pink penis. Or someone who just has a folder entitled ‘Dick Pix’ on their smartphone just for show-and-tell moments like this...

Her slender neck juts out at him, he could easily wrap his hand around the base, the thought remains a pleasing barrier that cages in his anger. Kai grabs her wrist and pulls her flush against his chest, giving no thought to the amount of attention they’d just drawn by the encounter. “Keep that mouth running and I’ll shove something hard down it,” his touch burns across her skin.

Twisting her wrist, she pulls free. “We’re in public.”

“You think that will stop me from bending you over and ramming into you from behind.” It isn’t a question. Little did she know, Kai would never expose her to a crowd simply because she is his little prey, a little treat for his eyes only to feast on.

**

Fourth book in the 'Dangerously Erotic' series.

A dark look flashes through his eyes and Emilia feels liquid heat leak from the junction between her thighs. "Gabriel Calváni." The man introduces himself.

Emilia scoffs, "nice name, Romeo."

"Charming, sweetheart. Do you have a name or do you go by; Juliet?" A smirk forms on the tall mans face, it'd been a while since such an expression had been welcomed.

The woman holds back her surprise at his teasing banter, "Emilia O'Niell."

* *

"Prepare yourself for an explosion of pleasurably, erotic destruction." — Jay