Finally

I was restless. Tired of waiting for the doorbell to chime. Waiting for the next guy to walk into my life. I say that as if I were an old hand - as if I had many guys in my past. Actually there had only been a few, and none of them staying for very long. But I was hoping that this one would be it. The big one. The one that fixes everything, puts my life on track, and makes me feel... okay.

I don't think I had felt okay for a while at that point.

I had a pretty good idea what I would see on the other side of that door. 'The perfect guy'. Or someone vaguely resembling that picture of him I had in my head, just enough that I could put faith in him to be what I thought I wanted. I was so clueless about what was actually waiting for me when I answered the door.

It was me. I was on the other side of my door. Now I know what you're thinking: narcissist alert. This girl opens the door to her perfect lover and it's... herself???

Actually it was a mirror, and the mirror had a note.

Dear Jess,

You don't really need me, you need her.

You can't meet me without meeting her.

You can't know me without knowing her.

You can't accept me without accepting her.

And most importantly,

You can't love me without loving her.

I can't wait for that to happen.

So I looked at the mirror again, and I started getting better.