Hidden Treasure
Too busy to stop and too busy to see,
too busy giving sweetly packaged pieces of me.
I looked up be it brief what I saw destroyed me.
The brass ring jingled painfully the sounds made unearthly.
The reflection, who is she?
Nobody mentioned.
Has she always been there?
I had a vague recollection.
Then I was falling fast out of my mind.
Where were the hands I held all my life?
Nobody there, those mortals I trusted.
Not just backed away but becoming the culprits.
The reflection reached out, glittering light.
Through the terror and anguish I could still see her shine.
Again I was falling down impossible depths.
There is nothing lower, not in life, not in death.
Like Alice through the looking glass,
how could I say goodbye?
It all mattered so much,
so I tried and I tried.
Watching it all spinning away and away,
seeing parts of me in all I had given away.
My mind stilled and I knew,
I had nothing left in me to help me through.
I held nothing back and got nothing returned.
The last of me was tattered and burned.
The last of me was gone long ago,
feeding the needs of those who needed me so.
They left when they realized what they had done.
Nothing left in me useful, time to move on.
Landing in this upside-down place terrified and confused.
Creatures knew my name, none of them I knew.
I couldn’t trust anything in this world without shape.
I curled up in a pitiful void, my sorrow my cape.
I cried silver butterflies and orange dragons with ropes.
My tears fell into seeds growing owls and wolves.
They grew loud and hungry in the void of my pain.
Terror and weakness grew as they raged.
I lay there for lifetimes of seconds and breaths.
Years into minutes I wept and I wept.
My mind raced and spun searching for the cure.
The moments she stood there my mind was empty and pure.
I would think of that nobody of light not worth mention.
The dragons stood guard with butterflies on there noses.
The owls crying tears big as mirrors to mask me.
Those tears with reflections materializing her with me.
I’d see her there shimmering in fantastic form.
Hiding in the void now wrapped in her arms.
I'd look to the dragons realizing anew,
how lost I was now in this world beyond truth.
I'd forget beautiful nobody again and again.
Sliding fast to delirium, falling back out of my head.
Emerging she’d creep between claw and buzzing wing.
First random, then often, then an everyday thing.
Years had gone by still she came everyday.
One day I bravely didn't push her away.
I held out my hand her face showed delight.
She took me by the hand we emerged into bright.
She held me steady while I looked around.
Eyes adjusting to the new reality I found.
I looked back again to my magical friend.
Laughing at my expression, awareness set in.
Reaching out I touched the cool glass I stared in.
Twirling around she glittered so free.
I felt the air around me as I twirled,
keeping pace…with me?
My laugh grew louder,
myself time to be.
She was me; I was her, the magical nobody.
Staying hidden behind the masks I would go by.
This time with no hiding she was visible and bright.
I realized with horror, I was hiding from my own light!
I wasn’t protecting myself from the monsters!
I was only protecting the pain that I fostered!
No, she laughed again, you gave you away without any care.
You’d have given them me too, you were so unaware.
Instead your pain saved me, kept me hidden and safe.
Now you understand and it’s a glorious day.
Now I am safe with you, full of trust and full of love.
I'd never give you away, you are a gift from above!
Myself, I remarked,
quickly grasping the point.
Your quiet genius you know that?
Her curtsy making me laugh.
You knew they would never let me be free,
if the light of you, sill flickered through me.
Safe then, in our dark despair. Who wants that?
We weren’t worth their care!
The light not put out, but carefully tended,
allowed only to burn as a tiny hot ember.
For staying hidden back then was the only way through.
Hiding my light is what led me to you.