Game? or Player?

The never ending silence

Prying open my eyelids

Searching for what a smile is

When inside screaming in violence

Just want to feel something

Other than despair

Sometimes it's kept deep inside

And don’t want to share

Then I do but there’s

Nothing inside left to spare

But all I do is contemplate

Who? What? And where?

Am I part of the game?

Or am I just a player?