I Bow
I'm choking on myself
just let me scream
let the dark close the doors
let the night sink it
I can't take this anymore
I'll suffocate again
All I want is to scream into the night
to let the darkness hides my tears
now anger is all that appears
it tears me apart
even as I mold it into leather
I'm strong but I am cold
I opened the door
But the light shown too bright
I ran screaming into the night
the night hides my tears
but there's a sound I no longer hear
It's that fake, cover up, whirring
it drowns out the sirens and bombs
it kept me sane
but now I remain
though the city has long been gone
I survived an earth quake
just to witnessed a storm
I was only a child
when I left my home.
I was only a child
when stared off the edge of a cliff
and imaged myself
sprawled at the bottom of it.
I was only a child
when I took death's hand.
No one owes me an apology
they all already paid for it
Whether it was the system
that betrayed me or not
doesn't matter anymore.
I'm locked outside that door.
The door to the real world
a world full of pain
I walk next to people who still remember my name.
They all think I'm insane
but in a world full of sorrow
in a world full of pain
not dying is a win
and its all that I can take
it's one of those days
its where I remain
even when I don't want to remain here anymore
I can't open the door.
It's world full of sorrow
its a world full of pain
its where I remain
till the end of my days
Its a knife in the back
its a stab through the heart
but its a start
cause I'm alive again
At I'm not sufferin' so hard
It's a twist of the knife
but it helps me feel alive.
I may be weak
but I am strong
I'm standing alone
but I still want fall
I want to fall
cause its not worth it anymore
I close the door
I stand on the edge of a cliff once again
I remember that time
when I sprawled at the bottom of it
I still want to die
but sometimes I get live
I continue of because this
I'm no longer one of those kids
I exist
Its a world full of sorrow
its a world full of pain
but its worth it,
every
second of the day
I hope
someday
I'll feel that again
the twist of the knife
the breaking of skin
its real
its hard
its cold
and it hurts
more then you
ever will know
but alive
for the first time
in a long time
is good
and I would 't
give it up
if even I could
I survive every shadow and fall
And I wouldn't give it up for a second of peace on the plane
I remain
I remain
I remain
I remain through it sorrows
I remain through the joys
Even if I hate it
I still rejoice
When all I know is lost
this life, it came with a cost
I'm cold
I'm broken
I've swallowed my soul
But the pieces are here
in the bloodied hands I hold
and I'll sew it back together
no matter how long it takes
I'll live
I'll exist
for fuckgoodness sake
I stake my claim
on
life
with nobody by my side
I survive.
It's a world full of sorrow
It's a world full of pain
I just want to scream
and hear it call out my name
instead I take a bow
to an unadoring crowd
I bow
I'm alive.