The Adventures of Gorgeous and Julie
((that's not me being narcissistic, its a play on my name and she calls me that all the time...))
They say opposites attract, but this is truly ridiculous.
I have dark, wild curly hair. I am publicly schooled and have seven siblings. My dad was military and I grew up...NOT in the city.
Julie has blond, straight hair. Home schooled and a single child. Her father is a linguist and she grew up in inner city Huston.
And we are TWO FREAKING PEAS IN A POD! If we stayed together for any longer we coulda taken over the world.
Some of our BEST moments would not make sense with this audience, to be fair, but I am under the impression that the BEST friendships are all about the LITTLE things.
She was doing an internship in Peru and read a facebook post I put out about an encounter I'd had on my way back from getting a C on my biology midterm. I had been crossing the street to my apartment building and this guy in the car driving by shouted "HAIL SATAN" at me. So I turned around and waved, because what else are you supposed to do?
I thought it was funny, so I shared it.
Well, Julie thought it was HYSTERICAL, like i knew she would, and she facebook video-ed me and we were laughing so hard and she told me the sadist news! Apparently, when she first read it she laughed out loud and told the other people in her group about my post...no one else thought it was funny. They were all VERY concerned about me and even MORE concerned that Julie thought it was funny.
For one day I had strangers in Peru feeling bad for me.
Winters are cold and I tried to drink more teas instead of coco since i was gaining a little pudge. Well, in school, I worked at 3am so my mugs sometimes ended up in odd places as I walked around getting ready for work and then leaving for work. That day, my mug was placed on the stove.
I forgot about it by the time i got home in the afternoon, and flopped down on the couch to get my homework done.
Time passes and Julie comes in and starts to talk to me about my eating baby hearts....
With a straight face she asks me how my "regimen" is going and if there's any other "cravings" i'm getting. She asks if I now have an aversion to garlic or urges to wear pointy hats.
I left the tea bag at the bottom of the mug on the stove and it REALLY looked suspicious under the kitchen light...kinda like a little heart.
I like anime and Julie- not so much.
So back in 2020 when i'm at home doing my last semester of school online, in the middle of a quiz, and i hear my phone buzz, I glance at it and see JULIE: "HE DIED!..."
You can understand I was a little...alarmed.
Thankfully it was NOT a timed quiz and i was on the last question anyway, so I picked up my phone and read it right away.
"HE DIED! WHY DID MAES HUGHES HAVE TO DIE!?" it was a longer rant, but it was about like this.
Granted my brain was still half on the quiz, but the other half had deduced that this was not an emergency. So while I couldn't remember where I had heard the name "Maes Hughes" before, I finished (and aced) my quiz.
After that I went back to the text and pondered for a sec and then it hit me..
She was watching FullMetal Alchemist!! AND if she was crying about HUGHES, that means she got past TUCKER!!!! ON HER OWN!!!
So I texted back and was just like, "hon, we gotta LOT to talk about...the doctor is IN."
In all honesty, I can only give stories that have made my day and the reasons that I absolutely love her. The way she talks and tells stories fills me with joy! She has such a fun way to turn a phrase and the way she can just make you laugh.
I can not be without my spiritual twin here!
True equality is surrounded by the idea of the outcome of ones opportunities and choices.
That's the only way you can ensure different people are happy with their life. Different people will want different things in life. Different goals make them happy.
What makes me happy doesn't even make my closest sister happy, and we're related and we were raised the same! We were treated the same and understand the same references and the same parents, but in the end, our life choices are vastly different.
So, looking at sisters from the same household, how can you expect two people from different households to bow to FORCED equality?
Because that's what (unnamed) people are talking about, yes? Disguising it by calling it "equity" instead.
By forcing fundamentally different people to be equal, you end up with situations like "A Wrinkle In Time". Of course its a blown up imagined version of the fear, but think about it for a moment.
This force is taking over planets in time and space and foceing everyone and everything to be "the same". If you don't agree with "It" then you must be "corrected". Doesn't that sound chillingly familiar and remind you of Mary Poppins for so odd reason?
Not to mention that "It" was called "It". Non-binary and inclusive to ALL so as not to offend anyone.
Can we all agree that as a fantasy book it is still far fetched, but there are some concerning parallels as an anecdote?
Your freedoms only extend until they infringe upon the rights of others. You have choices and opportunities. No one is keeping you where you are at except you.
Make those hard choices.
Make the better of two ill choices...or that third one that no one talks about...
Its your life.
YOU live it.
Its not my job.
The stories I could tell you about my nephew when he about five years old and things that would just pop out of that childs mouth...
~ Kindergarten was half a day. He would walk to school with his older brother in the morning, but I would have to pick him up in the afternoon.
One day we were walking home and holding hands. I forced him to hold my hand while walking so that we could match each others pace. He was also a flighty child and I didn't want him to run into the street.
This day he spontaneously speaks up and says, "the only reason you walk faster than me is because your legs are longer and you pick you feet up more!"
Impressed he was able to put that together on his own, I nod, smile, and respond with, "I know."
He looks horrified and says, "how did you know i was going to say that?"
I laugh and shrug, "I didn't. I was just agreeing with you."
"Oh," he says, and thinks about it for a moment. then he looks at me suspiciously and insists, "BUT HOW DID YOU KNOW?!"
By then I couldn't help myself.
"I can read minds."
"I knew it," he mutters, narrowing his eyes.
~I was making him lunch and microwaving him easy-mac. I can't remember why i was in such a bad mood that day but i yelled at the microwave to hurry up. I was just in a mood, ya know?
Well, behind me, sitting at the counter waiting for his food was Jackson.
"Did it hear you?"
My brain totally short circuited. Picture, if you will, the most innocent looking child waiting kindly for his food and asking a frazzled and crazy aunt if the sky is purple.
"Did it hear you?"
It occured to me then that he was talking about the microwave.
"Oh, no, hon. The microwave can't...um...look, i'm just-"
"It can hear me."
With the most serious expression and with unblinking eye contact he said, "it speaks in my mind and i can tell it to hurry up."
I had to leave so I could die laughing. When I told my sister what her son said later that day I almost couldn't get the story out I kept laughing...
These are only two stories....
Jackson had a whole following when he was little on facebook....my sister would just put up the heading: "Jackson Story" and her friends would go nuts.
I love my nieces and nephews. My sisters kids are my babies. They are a riot.
5 ‘Rules’ in Hunting When You’ve Defected
(Authors note at the end)
My name is Simmi’on. I make my living off bounties and jobs given to me by the king. Specifically, the gathering of the heads of former comrades. It is the cost of my own protection as well as my own living. The crown allows me to stay within the borders of the land- my own cottage as well- so long as I can clean up the mess from time to time.
I saw no problem with this.
There is a trick in tracking the creatures of darkness, however. Knowing how they think is a blessing and a curse…it helps, but it just makes me even more annoyed.
For example, there was the time I caught the trail of Krizix, a Knight in the Demon Lords army. Though he was only a knight when I left, he no doubt had risen in rank over the year. He was sly, powerful, and dangerous. The sooner I killed him the better.
I trailed him along the border of two human kingdoms and along the sea. His trail lead me inward to the deserted West Gate forest when I began to notice I was being tailed as well.
High evil is never alone, you see. The more important the evil, the surer you are that it will be protected at all costs.
Rule 1) They do not play fair. If you track them, they are, more often than not, tracking you as well.
It was about this time that Krizixs trail began to vanish. Gnashing my teeth a bit, I went as far as I could, and then waited.
It was a beautiful day. One my neighbors in the small village I had settled in often say is “picnic weather”. I made a mental note to return the basket I had borrowed before.
The ruins of West Gate were over grown and the earth was doing its job swallowing it up. The trees, though new after the war that had taken place here, were somewhat starved. Their root showing as they tried to dig into the hard packed earth. Other than that moss and weeds were the only thing hardy enough to really grow in bulk…
“Are you waiting for me?”
The woman- to any human- was stunning. She wore blue dragon skin silk that showed off well-toned muscles, but not only that, the shade of blue made her eyes large and sparkle in the sun. The style of fabric played with her long hair that was tied back in multiple bands, allowing one of them to frame her face while also being practical.
“No,” I said, “unless your leader is a coward.”
Her smile showed pearls and would have melted the heart of the kings army. It was then that I remembered I had my hood up and she honestly thought I was just a stronger than most human.
She walked closer to me. I assume there was a smell associated with the movement, but unless I make a conscious effort, I don’t have a sense of smell or taste.
“Why are you following us?”
“Why do you think?”
“You like games?”
“What’s your name? It’s a little rude to stalk us and not at least introduce yourself, yes?”
“My name is of no consequence, Roberta,” I said, “you’re looking a little thin. Is that why you’re trying so hard with me?”
I am usually a gentleman, but succubus’s aren’t ladies, so watching her get angry made me happy. I may be reformed in many ways, but I do have a bit of a MEAN streak…and I do enjoy watching my prey squirm.
“You have me at a disadvantage,” she said recovering quickly and bending over so I had a view of her goods, “I guess I have to play your game? Will you tell me the rules?”
“Of course,” I said pulling my skeletal hands from my sleeves. Purple sparks flying between my knuckles.
“Hold still and scream loudly so that everyone knows you lost.”
She hissed and moved back quickly, “Lich!”
“That’s the problem with using too much perfume, Roberta, you tend to miss the important details of who you are dealing with.”
She spat and flipped her hair; all pretenses of seduction gone. Her nose wrinkled and she rolled her eyes.
“I suppose you’re the hunter in that tiny kingdom up North, Simon?”
I sent my first bolt of lightning. She shrieked as she flailed to one side. I laughed at the humorous look on her face.
“What was that?!”
“We are in the middle of a battle,” I replied sending another bolt and was rewarded with another humorous antic, “did you think I was going to chat with you some more? Alas, my time is worth more than that.”
I had managed to singe her hair pretty good. Her face was now red and her knuckles white with fury. She cursed and threw her magic at me which I blocked effortlessly.
She was testing me.
A succubus and incubus are not confrontational fighters by choice, but they can be very mean. The best way I have found to fight them is to get them serious from the get go. Get them angry to start and then just have your fight. If you don’t, the succubus will test your will power and endurance by starting off slow and then increasing the difficulty as she feeds off your energy that way.
As a lich, she couldn’t feed off me, but I still would get bored if I had to fight her preferred way. And provoking her was so much fun.
“How long since you last fed,” I asked, making sure I sounded genuinely concerned, “for you to be so weak, I would assume your leader would give you a hand out or drugged prisoner-“
That did it.
Roberta screamed so loud my skull vibrated a little as she shot toward me, blue lightning shooting from her fingertips in an arch.
Rule 2) Know your opponent.
Succubus and Incubus do NOT use anything other than themselves. To even suggest that they would use drugs or a “hand out” is the highest insult you can give them. I know most of them DO use drugs and are lower than scum, but to actually SAY it…well…its like rubbing crap in an open wound.
She leapt into the air, arching her back as she rained down what she thought was her version of justice on me.
All it did was remove my hood as I shifted my footing to keep up my defense. As she landed, she threw more spells my way, twisting the magic and bending it to try and get past the barrier.
A thick black mist began to rise from the ground around our feet and rise, obscuring her footwork. She was skilled, but like most of her kind, painfully unimaginative. The mist helped her out a little, but not enough.
I threw attacks her way and got her comfortable blocking them, so I threw a curse in the middle of them as well.
The voice was loud, but cold. I stopped only when Roberta stopped. She hissed and cursed.
“My lord, I can-“
“Retreat and regroup. We have other tasks to complete before days end.”
She huffed and flipped her hair. I could already see the result of my curse. A slight blemish was starting to appear on her face…on her cheeks and on her chin. The washer ladies in town were the ones who helped me develop the curse and reassured me that any female- demon or other- would hide under their bed until the curse ran its course. I still didn’t understand it very well, but the human women were so sure of themselves I thought I would try it out.
I watched Roberta as she walked away and vanished into the shadows of the ruins.
“I will inform the King that you live well, Simmi’on.”
“You could correct that and offer him my head, Krizix,” I prompted, “I am tired after playing with your pet.”
“Maybe later. I just made it to General and I have SO much to do. You remember what its like, right?”
“Yes, yes,” I sighed, “is this mist your doing?”
“Very well done.”
“Thank you, but we will be going now…” his voice drifted off into the air.
“Too bad for you though,” I walked up to a tree and placed a hand on it. I channeled the mist right back into it, “Dark Mist is a spell I invented, so you can choke on it.”
The trees leaves all wilted and fell off. The bark peeled like a rotten fruit and inside was a demon. His black skin flaking off due to the fact that I’d just forced his magic back into him. Its not something any physical body endures very well.
Rule 3) If a trail ends, then chances are you didn’t loose your prey, you’re right on top of them.
“General Krizix,” I said reaching down and grabbing one of his horns to haul him up, “you are far too young to know how to use Dark Mist. Did you know that its main use is to be used at night, not during the day? The sun is still up. There is a human child I have grown quite fond of that would call you ‘silly’ for such behavior.”
I snapped the horn off his head and he screamed.
“That’s for the village you terrorized where I had to start tracking you. They should be able to sell that and pay for damages.”
I snapped off the other horn and he writhed on the ground where I dropped him.
“This is my compensation since those people and those I’ve met and helped on the way haven’t been able to pay me.”
I looked down at Krizix and thought about Roberta for a bit. I let my mind wonder for a moment about how I had ended up here in the first place.
Sighing a bit, I bent over and cast a spell exploding the new generals head.
Rule 4) Make sure the target is dead.
“Did you have to make a mess?”
If I had flesh eyes to roll, I would have.
The Demon King herself sat atop the stone ruins as if they were an extension of her throne. Since she was NOT the demon ruler to destroy the West Gate I thought this impudent of her.
“I did not know you were so concerned with cleanliness,” I replied flicking off brain matter from my robe in her direction.
“Roberta is in a state,” she said, “what is that spell?”
“A new one.”
“So I figured.”
“I’m tired, little king, and you still have to unite the demon lords under you if you wish to conquer the human realms in full. I will excuse myself.”
She raised her sword and stopped me. I sighed.
“Why did you leave?”
“I am old.”
“That is no excuse!”
“I AM NOT LITTLE! I AM THE RIGHTFUL KING!”
I gnashed my teeth, “That is up for interpretation. I have lived under the rule of over 600 demon kings, Little King. Many more powerful and more dignified than you. Many more petulant than you, if you can believe that. But I am tired. I am old. I wish to rest.”
“So you fight for humans?! How does that make sense?!”
“Do you know how Lich are born?”
True to being a monarch, she didn’t flinch, she simply narrowed her eyes and didn’t reply.
“A Lich starting point is born when a human dabbles in what they should not. My root is that of a human. Therefore, is it not fitting that I should not die among my own? Is it not poetic?”
Here her face faltered a bit, “You…you’re betraying me for…poetry?”
I laughed, “It’s not personal, little king.”
Her face, all pretense gone, showed her confusion out right.
I watched with amusement. It wasn’t a total lie. I had discovered, with a little help, that being around humans- creatures of light- as a lich -a creature of dark- made me weak. And I hoped that one day that weakness would bring me death.
Sweet release and slumber.
“Are you sure you want to be my enemy?” She asked, her “kingly” face back on.
I made a show of looking her up and down, “I think I’ll live another 100000 years…”
Pink splotches appeared on her face even though I hadn’t put a curse on her and she stood. A dark gate appeared behind her and she walked through.
I waited for anyone else to appear.
When the sun hit the horizon and the moons began to shine I lit a few orbs and rummaged through Krizixs belongings. Stored away whatever valuables he had and scoffed at the other things he kept with him. Turns out the guy was painfully superstitious and a bit of a hoarder.
Rule 5) Always take a different rout home.
Unless you have made promises on your journey- which I HIGHLY recommend you NOT do- you want to NOT take the same way home. Becoming predictable is how you become a target. Its how bandits get their paydays and how some inns and towns get forgotten.
Since the former new general took me the long way around the coast, I decided to go over the mountains back home. The single small pass that was only open three months of the year.
I traveled North and East and hitched a ride with a small caravan. The merchant and his sons kind enough but were the kind that didn’t like magic much. They worked with their hands and for honest wages.
I respected that and when they saw I didn’t mean them any argument, they were more than willing to hold a conversation with me.
When I got to Botend town- the town at the southern end of the pass, it was too late and the pass was closed. Being what I was I could easily just ignore it and go ahead up the mountain, but, again, I’m old, and I’ve gotten so used to taking it easy these days.
I found an inn, paid my keep up front, and nestled in for a long winter.
(A/N): I wrote this for a competition, but I don't have the money for the entry fee, so I'm posting it here. The object of the competition was to write a story about the above picture.
How do you think I did?
And do you want more?
I've grown fond of Simmi'on as I've done this, but I want to know what you think...
I Will Run For President In 2028
America is my home - born and raised at its center.
Get to know me:
I am an American. I like random stuff, I'm religious, I mind my own biz while at the same time keep a healthy nosy personality, and food is life. I'm stubborn, I have strong work ethic, I never got or get my way, and I love to laugh and be with good humored people. Collecting books and reading them are two different hobbies and I like them both, I just do more of one than the other. I write fiction and dabble in poetry because what's life without creation, whimsy, and art?
I'm a Mutt. I've yet to take a DNA test because 1) they're expensive and I'm poor, and 2) I already know I'm a Mutt! My dads side are historically blue eyes that came from Mexico and my moms side are pioneer stock from all over and German. Have fun sorting THAT out!
However that IS the beauty of America, don't you think?
That you can SHARE in the heritage! I don't have to claim a Germanic tribe over a Latino or Hispanic one! We can share it! We don't have to choose!
Why not have eggrolls and tacos in the same meal! This is America, if we feel like eating it, then eat it!
This separation will stop.
WE are American.
BEFORE we are "latino" or "german" or "hatian" or "african" or [insert color or other nationality here] WE ARE AMERICAN.
Your heritage is IMPORTANT, but we must BUILD were we are at! Love who we are, but also grow and love who we may and will become!
My focus as President:
The presidency is the Executive Branch. In case you didn't know: That means its in charge of the military and enforcing the law. Its function is to protect the citizens from threats both foreign and domestic, (and, no, parents who just want to know what their kids are learning in school are not a threat, deal with it yourself.)
As of late (2022) the E.Branch has overstepped its bounds FAR TOO OFTEN. In the past year alone there has been 20+ Executive Orders which were to only be used in times of war and in the UPMOST EMERGENCIES!!
The Orders given have not pertained to any "emergencies" but have only furthered a political agenda.
I, for one, am tired of DCs political games that play with peoples lives.
I played around with parties, sure, trying to find my place. But I've made up my mind now.
I am Neither Republican OR Democrat. I am NOT independent OR libertarian.
I am an American and I make NO distinction between one American and another.
However, DC hill has a LOT to answer for. The corruption will stop. I will Protect America, as per my job as President. No matter HOW DEEP IT GOES.
Into the depths of Hell if need be.
I will root out the weeds that would suck this nation dry.
I want the chance to show you...to them, that the government serves the PEOPLE. NOT the other way around. That power means nothing if its not done correctly and sparingly.
If you give me this chance, I know I can do it.
I just don't have the funding.
I don't have the "Party". Will you join me?
Nothing is going to change if we don't start SOMEWHERE! How can we hope to do anything if we don't take chances?
Why be an ELEPHANT or a JACKASS?! WE ARE NOT ANIMALS! WE ARE NOT STUPID!
We are people.
They have forgotten that.
(feel free to ask lots of questions)
The Story is at the end...
***I kid you not this is a true story.
Growing up, if we woke up in the middle of the night, we ere allowed to go out into the family room and watch TV so long as we were quiet. This ensured my parents got to sleep through the night.
One night, I had a dream that I woke up, took my little whine-the-pooh blanket out to go curl up on the couch to either watch midnight infomercials (we only had 2 channels), or to put on a movie.
But as I came into the kitchen and looked into the family room...i saw a HUGE T-Rex sitting on the couch, chewing on the remote, the TV spazzing out.
I backed up slowly and went to fetch my two older sisters.
Of course they didn't believe me until they saw the T-Rex themselves, and then the T-Rex started to chase us!
In our house the kitchen, family room, hallway, and living room are all connected in a circle, so around and around the T-Rex chased us! I was little and was wearing my purple footie pajamas and slipped...even though I was sure the floor was carpet.
Somehow I was able to get up and run.
Then I was tugged under the table and one of my older sisters gave me a bag of tea leaves. the T-Rex stomped by us, sniffing for us, and then went into the other room.
My sister said the tea leaves will mask our sent as we sneak by and get papa.
We ran into the back of the house, jumped into our parents bed, shaking them awake.
My dad sighed, told us in his gruff and tired yet protective "stay here" commanding way, and then he left. I heard him banging on my older brothers doors, waking them up. My sisters were crying and my mom was trying to calm them down.
Curious, I crept out and down the hall.
peaking around the corner, into the kitchen...I saw my father and my two older brother fighting the T-Rex with lightsabers. They fought and killed it.
Then I woke up.
I didn't tell anyone because, let's face it, five older siblings, no one wants to hear about my dreams anyway.
Years later I had the same dream AGAIN. It really kind of creeped me out, but I still didn't tell any of the family. I told a few friends, because my dad really is awesome. My dad can totally beat up your dad.
And then one Christmas, when the family was all together, we were talking and just doing dumb stuff, and my older sister tells the story about a dream she had when she was a kid...about a T-Rex chasing us and how we got away using tea leaves and how dad and our brothers killed it with lightsabers.
They tell me not to say it...
I know of a boy who thinks he's a girl.
~Because Gender Dysphoria is a thing and enabling the delusion is NOT the answer. it should be treated like a REAL mental illness because it is.
~HIS OWN MOTHER neglected and abused her son until he pretended to be a girl to get his mothers affection. (#killallmen)
~Because the feminist movement has gotten to a point where its IMPOSSIBLE to a man to LOOK upon a woman for fear of losing his job! so if he can't beat them, join them!
~Because there are actual perverts out there that see this as an opportunity and will wear the dress to gain the trust of victims.
~Because social pressure is REAL. pretending to be gay is hard, but wearing a skirt to school isn't that difficult to fit in if you don't want to get bullied or wat to claim "victimhood status". you only have to pretend for a few years and then you have the problem of the "self fulfilling prophecy" and "social delusions" in that case it REALLY needs to be TREATED LIKE A REAL MENTAL ILLNESS.
I know of a girl who thinks she's a boy.
~Because Gender Dysphoria is a thing and enabling the delusion is NOT the answer. it should be treated like a REAL mental illness because it IS
~Because society told her that she wasn't good enough unless she was a boy. That no one would take her seriously unless she was a boy. That she was LESS if she was a "girl".
In other words. Society LIED to her and she didn't listen to the guy next to her telling her she looked nice today just the way she was.
But that didn't cut it because society told her that he's just being misogynistic and to ignore him...(its almost like society WANTS them all to be MISERABLE).
~Because social pressure is a real thing. If all your friends are a part of the LGBTlmnop+ then YOU have to find a victim group to belong to as well!
~Because boys are NOT THE ONLY PERVERTS.
I know people who don't know WHAT they are! (how many nonexistent genders???)
~Because they HAVE to be special. Being part of the normal rainbow just doesn't cut it anymore. These people HAVE TO STAND OUT.. they're DESIRE- no, their INSANE desire to stand out is so palpable you can feel it through the screen and that's what makes most people sick when they watch their videos.
They crave attention more than a starved vampire craves blood. If their desire for attention could be converted into energy we'd solve global warming with only three of them.
That alone is an illness to itself and they need help as well. That craving needs to be curved or its going to consume them if it hasn't already.
As it pertains to CHILDREN:
It is ABUSE and should be treated as such. Are ANY OF YOU aware of the sick parents out there claiming their children are trans only because THEY want to be special?! They're willing to put their kids through SO MUCH HURT and DAMAGE THEIR KIDS for LIFE for a little bit of social attention.
Children don't know about "gender theory". They think "playing with the doll house" means you're a girl. AND THAT'S OK. LET THEM THINK THAT. You can also tell them:
"hey, John, you're still a boy, but its ok for you to play with the doll house too if you want."
And he'll be fine! Probably very happy!
It needs to stop.
It needs to be TREATED as the ILLNESS that it is.
Abusive parents need to be called out as abusive!
Don't mistake my blunt ranting as calling you names.
Not once have I called ANYONE names, if you will go back and see.
I am saying that you are IMPORTANT and you need HELP.
That the depression and the hopelessness and the anger and the purposelessness you are feeling IS NOT because people are "missgendering" you...its because YOU haven't accepted yourself.
I thought you said “Welcome all new POSERS...”
I grew up without any space. I have seven siblings; five above and two below (and, no, my parents have never divorced and we're all legitimate).
My dad retired from the military shortly after i was born and we moved off post and into...well...not quite the country? Very much NOT a city, but enough of a small town to make city snobs annoying? We lived in a neighborhood, but the houses were far enough apart for privacy.
In other words I grew up with YARD WORK. hauling branches up and down the hills in our yard to the burn piles while my older siblings rode the lawn mower (yes we were little pyros and now we're big pyros). I knew how to use an axe and hatchet fairly well before I could cut even slices of tomato. (I still can't cut even slices...)...but of course if you ask kids to "go pick up sticks". They are going to find a stick they can PLAY with. My siblings and I were wizards, explorers, gunmen, swordsmen, you name it, we were it with a stick.
How much blood comes out of a cut after smacking your brother with a stick?
It depends on where you hit him.
But you have to make sure you hit him hard enough that he doesn't hit you back, because he WILL hit back harder.
Anyway, needless to say, we were wild, natures children. We played all day and caught fireflies in June. In the Fall and Spring we played in the rain and thunder until we were soaked and coughing on the water coming down. From the first warm day of the year it was no shoes until the first frost of the year and even then we fought it!
Now we're all older. We've gone our separate ways. I don't talk to them as much anymore...
I guess I just miss that free nature feeling as I've grown older.
So does it really surprise anyone that I grew up wanting so much to work at a landscaping and gardening center?
And then I got the JOB!
AND THE BOSS IS AWESOME!
AND THE CUSTOMERS (some are weird) ARE ALSO (mostly) AWESOME!!
I've worked SO many jobs do to going to school out of state, I've just bounced around from job to job. but this is the FIRST job where I really LOVE the work, the co-workers, the Boss, AND the pay! EVERYTHING has come together and I just can't loose this job...
....I am currently writing this in the midst of 16 dead houseplants.
I have had customers come back to the store and THANK me for the advice I have given them for their plants.
But for some UNHOLY reason I can't keeps MY plants alive.
I thought if I made it into a name and treated it flippantly it would hurt a little less...
how much do YOU know...
Sometimes I walk
and then I run
but always I can dodge
in between the fun
they smile and laugh
they hug and talk
I get to class
my gut like a rock.
but it doesn't hurt me
except when it does
when they target just me
the room starts to buzz
What have I done
to incur such wrath?
I hate them much more
they have crossed MY path...
I am invisible
unless they wish to "play"
their fake smiles greet me
no matter what I say
I wont go to school
today I will sit
I will be invisible
no one will mind me a bit....
(1) The Thief - Ms. Megan draws you in with this simple story. Fun, fantastic world with its own deep history and religion. It reads like a YA novel, you could read this to children. It tickles your world building fancy and the characters are SO witty and story woven so well together you don't really think much of it.
then you find out there's a book 2?? but this book ended so well?....
(2) The Queen Of Attolia - Will punch you in the face and torture your soul and upend your sense of reality and it is by FAR my most favorite love story ever...
DO NOT read to children unless they can handle stuff like this. Some can, some can't. Read first before reading to them...the first few pages alone had my own gut in knots....
(3) The King Of Attolia - I love this book with all my heart. I had to buy a new copy recently because the other one was falling apart. You can LITERALLY open to any random page and start reading because it will be a "oh I love this part," moment. And here you get lulled....you also get slightly tricked...eee..its just so well done, KUDOS to Ms. Megan!
(4) Conspiracy of Kings - This one is more of a "while this was happening in Attolia, THIS was happening over HERE" kind of story. AND its a doozy. But with a VERY sad, yet satisfactory ending. I forced my younger brother to read these books and I knew he'd reached *ahhem* THAT *cough* part when I heard him go "YES! FINALLY! WOO!" And then quiet down with an "awww..." because it really is a mix of emotions.
(5) Thick As Thieves - Ms. Megan does something here that most authors wouldn't dare and you don't realize she's done it until this book.
she has neglected to describe a significant character in any significant detail until THIS book. But in THIS book she gives the description, but doesn't give the name...
BUT she's written the character SO well that even before the character gives himself away...you know who he is and you LOVE him! This book is MASTERFULLY written and bless it I cried and laughed and....oh I love this so much...
(6) Return Of The Thief - I had to wait an extra year and MORE for this, but I waited with gratitude because I was DONE with rushed endings (like from other series I'd read, Adventures Wanted- going back on their own lore, Summoner Series- so anti-climatic I almost cried, Rangers Apprentice- destroying Wills character for feminism. etc.)
BUT, I was NOT disappointed AT all! That stuff you missed in book three? yeah. even as I'm warning you, you're going to miss it. There are clues ALL THE WAY IN BOOK ONE as to why things are the way that they are...why does Gen make the decisions that he does? Why? Don't you remember the obscure hesitations...aaaaalll the way...back....in....book....one....
***I love this series. This author is a wonder. I want a movie, but I don't want ANYONE to touch it, you know? its too good. I'm afraid of what they'd do to it. I want it to be popular for Ms. Megan. but if its too popular then it will get a movie and heaven FORBID amazon butcher it like they're doing to LOTR...Makes me sick just thinking about it....
that just mean i'll have to produce and direct it myself someday. Get her permission and hope she holds onto those rights with an iron grip.