I never cried as a kid... I held it all inside of me acting like it didn't exist. I didn't want anyone to see me cry because I thought that it was weak and I had promised myself that weak was something I would never be. So I pushed it all to the back of my mind and started to figure out ways to make it go away. I tried to cope without actually feeling anything and eventually something inside of me broke. Holding everything in, acting like everything was okay shattered my spirit. Now it seems so stupid because everyone cries sometimes even the sky cries when it can't handle anymore. No one ever told me that it was okay to cry. That crying didn't make you weak it just meant that something was important to you. No one ever told me that crying helps it filters out those feelings and makes them easier to deal with.

Abortion is a choice no one else should be bothered by. Guns DO kill, anyone who says its people that kill are just lying to the only fool listening, themself. I'm a Catholic who believes that God crafted us over eons as science has shown to be true with nebular and big bang theory, is there still a place for me #confused. I don't know what and where or how to think without pissing someone off, wait who did I piss off in that statement? I think life is about finding out what life is but what do I know I'm only an undergrad. I feel at an odd place thinking I'm old yet knowing full well I'm too yound to supposed to be thinking that way. I wish someone would just tell me how to think#jk #ithink. I like the world the way I see it, in one piece#staybeautiful. I like to think I'm ok with all people everywhere but my conscience still judges them, is it ok if I blame my conscience for being a bigot? Am I a bigot as a result? I know I'm a millennial and value nothing but can siri tell me if I can change, I hope the answer is yes. #seriouslywhydoistillusehashtagswhenicanjustsendatweetwithoutone

As humans, our very touch ravages. It is always the cusp of reality that we cling desperately to, refusing to admit weakness or fault with toxic adamancy. We've become an ouroboros of what we find most taboo, most unspeakable- we willingly swallow the lies we tell ourselves at night because we are afraid. Afraid of adulthood, afraid of truth, afraid of ourselves. Dancing around what is deemed socially acceptable is like walking on glass, it's easiest to simply cover up that which is exposed to keep  from getting hurt. So behind masks we hide, trying to play a role we never were meant to play. 

Around the throat of every adolescent is a noose made of all that is expected of them, required to be accepted in their community. Held up by what has warrented those expectations, some find it easier to breathe than others. Some, however, loose their footing, choking themselves out on dreams not necessarily their own. 

'A pity.'

'A shame.'

It is a chorus that is wailed at an increasing rate, solemnly sung alongside epitaphs and death dates inscribed far sooner than they should have been. Bodies laid to rest long before they were meant to. We cry for those we have lost but fail to bring justice to that what has been wronged. We stand for harmony but are unable to recognize the deterioration of one of our own.

Suicide is a term loosely used, pegged on those who are said they could not bear their own thoughts. Ironic, really, isn't it? We, as humans, mandate that our existence is communal, one of unity. Our entire lives consist of continuously intersecting pathways but we have the audacity to claim we live statically, separately when faced with something inflammatory. Originality isn't a cornerstone of humankind, so don't dare say it was a moment of weakness, some poor kid falling victim to self-imposed corrosion. The words we speak can contain acid, burning away resolve like it's skin. Don't think for a moment that the thoughts we have are isolated because they are not, they are a reflection of every single encounter we've had.

So let's acknowledge it by its true name, the one where the line between life and death is crossed by the means to an end has been facilitated by another- murder.