"He's not who you think he is," Brendan said as Josh walked away to get punch. I knew he'd have a problem with me bringing Josh as a date.

"Why do you care?"

"Because you don't realize who he is. I know him, you don't."

"What happened to 'whatever makes you happy'. Huh, what happened to that?" I replied, getting frustrated.

"He won't make you happy."

"Okay, you had your chance but the minute you thought, 'Hey, well Hailee might like me while another girl, who I don't like as much, definently likes me.' You decided to ditch me," I felt tears well up in my eyes as I replayed what happened. Him liking me, dating my friend instead. "Forgeting" to text me. Then Josh. We danced at the Winter Formal. I fell in love with him and not Brendan. Now Brendan playing the, "You don't know him," card.

"You're just like everyone says. Blatantly liking boys hoping you find the right one," He said, scrunching up his face like I was old garbage. Tears started to pour.

"You have no right to tell me who I can and can't date, just because you had the chance and missed it. You, son of a-a-a jerk! How could you?" I said as I sobbed. This is what they talked about. Wet-anger. You want to give them all of your anger and pent up rage, but tears stop it. You can't believe they've betrayed you like this. Sadness, anger, frustration flood out all your other emotions. I couldn't do it anymore. "Don't text me," I yelled at him as I left the dance...

Music seems to be relevant to everything. You can relate it to anything. All the guys I’ve loved are defined by songs. The first guy I loved song would’ve been Good Times by All Time Low and the other guy would be Sweat (by All American Rejects) or Broken by lovelytheband. It’s weird how alike the songs are to the people.

Like the first boy. He moved in from a bigger city to the small rural town I live in. The way this town lights up his eyes is so amazing. He’s one of those people who just likes to take in the situation to enjoy it. He has a very bright future and is definitely going somewhere but could never think about leaving.

The other boy I don't know as well but, still is really amazing. He's one of those guys who has lots of confidence to cover his insecurities. He is very well liked in my school. I don't think he even knows my name but everyone knows his. He doesn't realize how amazing he is. These are some just some of the small things I noticed about the songs and these boys.

Once it the seventh grade we had a dance for Halloween. It was pretty fun. I dressed up as Napolean Dynomite but you know, as like an almost teen girl. Now, that night my older sister came over to do my make-up. My older sister is a photographer and did make-up most of her life. So when me and my twin sister when to that dance we wore make-up that would put everyone else to shame. This was really fun for me because I couldn't do make-up like that. So we got there and danced. I remember one guy dressed up as Marty McFly but I (being the biggest dork there) was the only one who noticed it. It was great. Near the end of it was the most interesting though.

I went to get a pop from our school's vending machine when I realized I didn't have a single quarter I needed to finish my transaction. One of the popular 8th grade guys happened to be getting a pop in the vending machine next to me. I absent mindedly asked my sister if she had a quarter when the 8th grader asked if I needed a dollar. He was one of those really nice people that made it to the top of the foodchain. I replied with that I only needed a quarter. He then gave me the entire dollar and said for me to keep it. Not realizing it was an eight grade guy I was talking to, I said "Thanks, I love you Tristan!" He said I love you back and I turned bright red. He walked away like it was nothing. It was only awkward for me...

You know that moment, about ten minutes before you fall asleep? When you run through a bunch of scenarios. The "What if this happened in real life?" things. That is the place I call home. If I went through all of my made up scenarios it would take a hot minute. All the guys I had crushes on, all the made up people, the new friends. Before I sleep I always remember one, same situation. I really don't know why, but it just comes up. It's about a guy who would never really like me. In the scenario, I see him talking to me. Being friends with me and eventually, loving me. The strange thing is, is that it's the same guy. The one who is completely out of my league. The one I'd never be with...

People write what they feel.

That may seem like a simple sentence but it holds so many possibilities. Someone you writes about powerful people might feel powerless. Someone who writes about love may need it the most. If someone writes about laughter and comedy they probably want to laugh, want to make someone laugh, or feel like someone is criticizing them. People who write about important ideas or situations want to be taken seriously.

I know this because I am all of these people...

Nine minutes until class started.

He started a conversation with her.

She stared into his eyes.

They were pools of green,

Waves of ice converged with steel blue,

Sage vines grew over emerald stalagmites,

Olive on azure with flicks of colbat.

She couldn’t close her eyes...

Fire burned in her heart.

Kindled with his words to another girl,

She grew angry,

She cried herself to sleep at night,

Mornings were just as bad.

Screams of dread and fear raged.

Daytime was the worst,

Doubt was a power saw, cutting at her confidence,

The only forgiveness left in her heart was under attack.

Arrows of pain and guilt soared,

Sorrow spears cut through any thing that showed even the most remote appearances of life,

While catapults of misery hit right in the center of her only defense...

Him...

The beat of her heart was offset to everyone else's.

Her mind's pace was faster,

Her legs paced while her brain settled.

Constant ideas,

Papers thrown everywhere,

Notebooks sprawled every where.

Pens scattered across the floors.

It was her organized mess.

A big trophy case lined the wall,

Full of trophies,

Small and tall,

When people visited they asked where her's were.

She would pull out a box,

Full of participation, 2nd and 3rd.

But she was fine with this,

A smile sprung across her face when her siblings won,

Because she was the smart one.