one too many

missed steps,

two missed texts,

messed up a

friendship.

you "mistook" the

things we ranted,

but before,

we weren't to be

taken for granted.

"forgive and forget"

oh, but i cannot,

"forgive and regret"

that's more like it,

but i'll can it away.

otherwise,

i'll be weighed down,

drowned,

by the nagging feeling of

this unappealing mess.

for now,

i think we need

to take a banana split,

because things aren't

looking too sweet.

lately,

salt is the only thing

keeping me afloat.

but unlike evaporated water,

you won't me mist.

drowned

ocean of emotion,

burned

a crazed blaze,

breathing ashes.

i said i was over you too,

and that's still true.

but i still can't fathom,

why my mind still recalls him.

haven't seen him in a month,

but my subconscious' been on the hunt.

searching, scouring, scavenging,

for a message, a picture - it's challenging.

when i get a message i still hope,

it's one from you - nope.

we've lost contact and i forgot,

the sound of your voice - oh god.

"in love?" "out." "of love?"

out of his favor, who i still write of.

"too like the lightning, which doth cease to be".

months of silence made up for in a week - actually three.

i keep saying i'll stop karing,

but i can't, so i'll keep sharing.

of our memories and old thoughts,

'cause without them i'm lost.

it's been a month since i've seen you,

i wonder - does your mind wander too?

when you see purple,

i hope you smell lilac fields

cause

when i seen maroon,

i'm immersed in the autumn bloom.

when you see the moon,

i hope you rest well

cause

when i see the sun,

i wish our time wasn't done.

ah, the second amendment,

right to bear arms

but

to pursue this deadly chase,

can't compare to your bear embrace.

oh, but you were a trigger,

and i'm a pistol

busy

shooting toxic darts,

through lilac and maroon hearts.

setting down the weapons,

i'd rather sit and wait to

hear

of other "star-crossed lovers"

than face your revolver.

perched by the window

silently watching

as raindrops

race down the glass

ironically, we aren’t old

enough to drive

yet, you drove me crazy

smugly watching the

world drown in rain

umbrellas flying up

and the others

sprinting for cover

and yet, only you

ran though my mind

caged in the stormy

city where all the

gray clouds blanket me

with warm security

from fear of cold

whilst keeping out

the sunshine

you were the sunshine

gleaming in my eyes

but you weren’t

shining for me,

and i was just

peeking over

the gray clouds.

barren fields spanning five acres

seeds from distant lands breach the soil

dandelions emerging, white umbrellas dash

weeds reaching like wildfire, spreading fields of energy

unable to sprint away, the red goes for miles

metal strikes metal, sparks fly

admiring the fireworks

butterflies emerge from hibernation

swarming the blazing fields

where the mind wanders, the heart lies

mindless now, falling for a maroon heart

trouble breathing, tears flowing

spending spring afternoons smelling the flora,

and gazing at sunshine streaks

unknownst to us, i had allergies,

and the fireworks became dynamite

a crystal vessel, the ocean it cannot contain,

now channels waves towards an incoming ship

drowning whenever i sea you

beneath the cool waves, suffocating on quiet

coming up for air, watching the shores booking,

tracing awe words upon golden sands,

soothing echoes resonating from seashells

blinking away salted waters, then

hiding beneath the brave blanketing blue

dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, need oxygen

floating on the bright sided moon,

my mind that revolved the sun,

now glares from the fire

planets spin, the moon is dark

months ’til luna sees light

we fell out of orbit,

leaving only space between us

with no oxygen to breathe

the fire scorching me passes

when winter transitions to spring,

i’ll have my sunglasses.