The dark night scares me. I do not let the blanket slip. It covers every inch of my body. The edges are carefully pressed beneath my feet. My head, my hand and not even a strand of hair should be seen outside the blanket lest he enters the room and sees me. 

The door creaks open. I hear footsteps. They don't seem to be his but who knows he must have changed his stride. He knows magic after all. He told me he has magical powers. He can make Ma and Papa disappear.

The footsteps come closer and closer.

"Oh my goodness, Meera! Don't cover your face or you will suffocate in this heat."

It is Ma. She always comes up to check on me once before I sleep. He comes after that.

"Meera, remove the blanket from over your face," says mother as she sits besides me.

"Ma, please let me sleep with you today."

"Sweetheart, you are growing up. You should sleep on your own now."

"But Ma, please," I plead once again, "I feel scared in the dark."

"Now baby that is not right. I have explained to you so many times, you should not be afraid of the dark."

"Ma, please"

"Alright, I will switch the night lamp on."

"Nooo.." I scream.

How do I tell Ma I can see his face in the light of the night lamp? I get more scared.

Mother caresses my forehead with her warm soft hands. I love to hear the jingle of her bangles.

"Calm down Meera; don't get angry. All children by your age sleep alone." she says, as she continues to caress my forehead.

I close my eyes. I can feel her leave the room. 

Her soft hands have moved away. 

I now wait for his hard sweaty hands.

Lord, here we are again.

I'm praying to you before my end.

Knees on bend, hands together on my chin,

Our daily contact has become a trend.

God, your guidance is needed,

As I struggle to share my faith.

I've been away from church too long

So around pastor I'm scared to bare my face.

My tithes, that 10 percent I promised?

To give you every payday?

Well I let that tab add up

And now my soul is screaming mayday.

So I'm praying for your forgiveness Lord,

I'm done with these sinful affairs.

So after I get my act back together,

I'll be there next Sunday I swear.

Let me flip the script from the stereotypical.

Let's go turn the tables, get away from the typical.

You say men are dogs, a pit bull at best.

A Rottweiler at the heart, which is frozen in chest.

But you girls, you women, you've hurt men too

Turn your feelings off after all this we went through

Love was exchanged, souls intermingled,

Too much shared just to break back into singles.

You cry, I cry, but in the long run I'm crushed

Never knew putting back a heart could be so tough.

Ripped us up to pieces, but gathered your tatters

And left mine to dry, my mind state shattered.

But I'm the dog right? I'm the relationship killer?

But who's the one on snap, with a puppy ear filter?

Guess times have changed, you're the only one

Whose heart is ice cold, with no sensitivity to love.

I've never been fond of clubs

But this night I made the trip.

I saw you across the room

And I offered to pay your tip.

You looking at me looking at you

So I noticed you noticed me.

Let's get out of here

Take you where you're supposed to be.

On my bed in my house,

Suede cushions of my couch.

Tip toe up out this club

So I might get you aroused.

I pull the rubber out my pocket

But I saw you watch it.

So I put it back

And you told me no need to botch it.

Said go head and unwrap the protection

As I saw your face fill with a rosy complexion.

Now we're sexin on the middle section of my sectional, I've never felt so sexual.

After that cardio regimen

And we finished intertwining our elements,

I see the rubber never made it on

Now my futures evident.

9 cycles in a row get missed

As that new life grew inside.

Now another calls me daddy

Despite my fathers insight.

He told me watch out

These girls try to trap soldiers.

I understand it now

Since I pay the support that I owe her

The things you didn't do

The dreams you didn't pursue

The life not lived

    Go

         Live

                Now