Lost in this cloud
Not a sudden thunderstorm,
The blackness just ebbed in
Casting longer shadows,
Over almost everything
No claps of thunder,
No sounds of rain
Just deafening silence,
Sound of muted pain
When everything shuts down
Reception dead, the lines are cut
Isolated from all life lines
Like they don't give a fuck
Knowing they really care
Terrified it's all a lie
Isolated from all reason
Commonsense begins to die
Poisoned thoughts filling the air
Choking on guilt and fear
Screaming through the fog
Knowing no one will hear
Too tired to fight alone
No light, no air, no hope
Trying to relight your sparkle
Quicker than you can tie rope
Make your choice
Ever wonder their motivation
Feel they may be one of those
Narcissistic humans
Who will only feed your lows
Their charms evaporate
Once their need's forfilled
Making you spin and twist
An unknown battlefield
Dismissing, acusing, bristling
You play a losing game
All efforts to appease
Only fail and cause shame
Do you make excuses
Or try to understand
Justify what they do
Hope it's not all underhand
Why are your good intentions
Met almost with contempt
Thinking love is undeserving
That no one cares, they're exempt
Can kindness be exploited
If given when in need
Did you care too much again
To show how much you bleed
Can you keep forgiving
What it does to your mind
Can you afford the price it costs
To care and to be kind
I will not change who I am
To prove their misbelief
It's time for them to learn
Life's hard, but friends provide relief
Truth and trust would light the way
Debunking self doubt so blind
If only their eyes would open
They'd see it's actually in their mind
Choosing what makes them happy
Will be what sets them free
To accept and comprehend love
From friends and family
It's not an easy journey
They'll stumble trip and fall
But while they keep trying
They're not using you at all
If they refuse to make that choice
And continue selling only pain
Make happiness your own choice
Sometimes you lose to gain
Being mean, selfish and hurtful
The test they don't think you'll pass
Wishing you won't give up on them
Hoping your love and care will last
It might be a harsh lesson
The friendship's their risk to take
If they're in it superficially
They've underestimated the stake
Remember always: you're deserving
Of the epic love you give
Don't pay their pain with your happiness
You need it to love and live
Epic love
That epic kind of love
The kind you want to run from
Because the thought of losing it
Surely will be the end of worlds
Can you dare to dream
To imagine having bliss
Can the past's nightmares
Be forgotten, be forgiven
It's to big to be denied
Just take the jump
And live this crazy love
That comes once in a life
Wonderland is fading
Silly Alice, drinking and eating and falling
The mad hatter still haunts her
The queen still in her head
The mysterious cat appearing with his riddles
The landscapes unstable, changing, warping
The paradigm is shifting
Wonderland is fading
Replaced with a dream or perhaps just a mirage
A lion of all beasts
Territorial, dominating, a creature of the night
He waits for her to make the kill
She's stuck in indecision
Trying in vein to protect her fragility
Her pieces still scattered on the AstroTurf of a memory
Such vast plains too terrifying
The pieces could be lost forever amongst the grass
She could never return whole if she fell
Mess of threads
Now look, silly girl,
Look at this mess you have made
Knots and tangles, webs and weaves
Just wait, I say, just wait and see
This, this is a magnificent mess!
Look closer you will see
Silver threads of wisdom
Dancing round colorful memories
And all the beautiful kind souls
That I have spun in along my way
It is where I draw strength
That is the tapestry
I call my life
Anxious writer
My first line got lost
My first line got lost so I'm using the second
As I did ten other things to get back to remembering I was looking for a pen
For my first line
I'm sorry sometimes I can't hear
The outside screaming in
The line, the line is back
My first line
Quick the pen...
My heart is leaking
That was it!