We always talk about the rollercoaster but never the line. The feet-hurting, yawn-inducing yawn to get to the crescendo that will make life worth doing. This year was the line. I don't remember much of anything of this year except that I had a mental breakdown and that I had to go to a mental hospital. The result has been a hellish three months of trying to get back to some form of normalcy. Even sitting and writing this feels like standing in an 85 minute wait line on a balmy summer day at an amusement park. This year ended with a bang and I am hoping the finish will be better than where I am right now.

Hoping for better

After the shitty year

Pandemics and masks,

Putin and Ukraine and

Young people dying daily.

Nothing

Ever

Wavers

Yet, I still hold

Eager hope that

After twenty-three years

Real change will happen.

Dragons, shut up about the fucking dragons. The commercial plays on repeat as I try to close my eyes and go to sleep. I used to be able to just roll over but now I have to distract myself with Hoarders to go to sleep. I think about how cool a clean hoard that was shaped like a fortress would be. Strategically assembled to be safe and secure and allow easy passage. A cozy place for me to pretend to be a dragon, squirreling my belongings away where I can rest in peace.