When I saw her from a distance she was beautiful. As clear as day and as simple as a blank page.

When I stood by her, her eyes lowered and she bit into her lip. As shy as a sun on that rainy day.

When I held her close to me she quivered just a pinch. As quiet as the ruffles on some beautiful dress.

When I took a step back my hand covered in black. As dark as the moonless night in a forest.

When I turned around she was utterly dark. As bleak as our future ahead of us like never before.

I want to hold you when that song plays

I want a hug in the wind

I want to kiss you in the rain

I want a dance

I want to sing along that song

I want a jump in the wind

I want to laugh with you in the rain

I want a smile

All the colours that I look at

Are all beautiful

But then there are those

I have ignored

Like I have ignored you.

The brown is ever present

Its comfortable

Just like I am

Always surrounds me

Like surrounded by you

The grey of those eyes

Steady and gripping

Like a paralysis

Holds me in place

Some place with you.

I go to work as always

Nothing like never before

Then I walk around

Before I come home

Coming home to you.

Wondering of our life

Those elements missing

Or are we too comfortable

When you are with me

And I am with you.

Missing someone is terrible. And when the time comes and the person isn't actually there after the long day, it sucks much more. There are times when you need somone to simply hug you after a long day. Or have your head lay in their lap as the sleep lulls u in peacefully.

I don't have that feeling now but I know it having faced it myself. Let couple of days pass and I will be there myself. But today, today I write for him as I feel my need there. A place I should be in right now because someone (that one particular someone) needs me to be there after his long day.

Are you going to be like this? Are you going to make me love you and look away? Are you in a bad mood? Is it because of me? Are you going to look at me and not smile? Are you going to be this withdrawn? Is it something I did? Are you going to make me suffer? Are you the kind to make me worry? Are you the kind to make me wonder if you are worth hurting over? Are you really going to be indifferent? Is it going to be this hurtful from now on? Are you going to pretend to not see my worry? Are you going to be blind to my sadness for you? Are you going to ignore that I need you? Am I the only one worrying? Are you going to tell me that it is my fault? Are we going to fight and make up? Are going to make me give up on you? Am I being stupid in thinking this? Are you going to widen my wounds or close them? Do I deserve this? Are going to be that kind to turn away? Are you going to walk away? Why did you place a stone over my heart?

Some fun kids

And some funny jibs

New people

And new place

Life of one side

Live like of a saint

Smiling around

And laughter bound

Happy people

Go lucky creatures

Ruled life

Of one after other

A house of life

That lives back in time

Heart is magic

And rebellion is freedom

Choose the side

Of lesser meaning

Happy heaven found

Standing on grey cloud

Ride along and ride now

Time is a mystery

And an unkept woe

Is isn't here

And it isn't by me

If it is by you

So wait thea

I am the one

With golden bow

So ride along and ride now

For time is bitchy

And its impatient

Will it wait

Or its your craddle

It isn't by me

It isn't by you

It might be a butterfly

Of a cool blue

Catch it

Before it catches you

So ride along and ride now

For time is a hag

Running its own show

Just the other day, the simple concept of a love relationship between school children seem so strange to my mother.

She frowned and stated that such kids must often do bad with studies. It isn't necessarily so, we told her. Her frown deepened but she said no further.

It made me realise that how generation after generation we humans have become more complicated..we compartmentalize our lives and set each task and emotion apart in boxes. Studying, scoring, relationship and friendship. Boxes have made life a managable office.

These boxes are neatly stacked in rows after rows, touching the ceiling.

Sure it has made ptioritizing easy and it has made life easier to deal with but such a thing has also brought about a wave of problems like depression, supression, agression and such.

Packing our emotions into neat boxes is a task of human mind trying hard to control the heart. Eventually the box fills up to the limit and burst open with the pressure. Then all the boxes are soaked in that one thing and there is nothing else visible.

I was mad at her and she was mad at me.

I moved on and she moved on.

I miss her and she misses me.

I want to be with het and she wants to be with me.

I love her and she loves me

But again,

She gets mad at me and I get mad at her.

I will get angry at her and she will get angry with me.

I will move on and she will move on.

I will miss her and she will miss me.