I am a sensative person when it comes to my God. I have heard so many stories about the way we are, why we are, and what we are expected to be.
I am judged daily by who I am, who I love and who I turned out to be. No one has the right to judge anyone else, even ur God. I do not live my life by the bible. Only because man made the bible. No one that was there then is here now except God. He did not write a bible, but he left scriptures to live by. And if you could read what he left then you could deliver a message to all. It is my belief and only MY belief that the reason we have different races is because of where Adam and Eve descendants delivered their children. If it was hotter and more sun, the children came out darker, if it was colder and less heat they came out lighter. I have seen two black people have a very light child. I have seen two white people have a very tan child. There is no logic to that. We all was born with eyes, nose, arms, legs, torsos, feet, fingers, hands, and head. Unless there was a complication in you growth development inside of your mother. This you can blame on your great to the hundredth power grandparents Adam and Eve. You see God made you in his mind “perfect”. For everything that his evil arch nimonsis had In mind, God created something to cure it or fix it. So you ask “hey, what about cancer?”. My opinion is that the cure for cancer lies in a bug that is here to annoy us but carries the cure. Such as June Bugs.
They do nothing, yet they carry something we need, and you only have hours to achieve it before they die. Meanwhile, more are growing in the dirt. Think about it. Silly me Right?
No. Everyone has their own God. They honor him or her in their own way. That is perfectly fine, because he do not judge you no matter what you do. He forgives you for all that you do. He might not answer when you want to be heard, but he hear ever word you send him. He's there for you when you need him, because he will never let you fall.
" Your God is your strength within everything you believe in" is my message to all.
I am a living testimony that he protects and listens to you. And I will forever spread his word. I love you, father Amen.
Is There Or Isn’t There
... a god. The Father? The I Am?
If we only go by the Bible, a book, written and rewritten down through history, and once so ordered to be written according to the likes King James demanded,the teachings on those pages tells us there is a god. A benevolent god. A righteous god. A loving god. A god who created mankind in his image.
And that is where I begin to question things. In his image. Is god physically all colors? All races? With prejudice? Hatred? Love? One to forgive? One that lives with denial? Anger? Fear?
These are but a few of the many traits humans have today. As such, if we are made in god's image, then so to are we part of his emotional precognitive way of thinking.
God created the big flood, killing thousands of people. He destroyed two cities because of sin, a sin I will add that was created because all those who lived there were created in his image, so in a broad sense, God ... was a sinful person.
And yet, we are taught to love and honor God as we should our parents. We are taught that God loves us all. Still, we have to this day, diseases that kills millions every year (Cancer, Leukemia, heart attacks and now Covid. Before it was swine flu, AIDS, the Pandemic of 1918 and so forth).
So we pray, to a person, entity, thing ... to someone or some thing no human eyes have ever see and place our trust in. There are times whenh prayers seem to be answered, but far more often, said prayers never reach past what words crossing over trembling lips.
Something such as this can open a can of worms that can become a large snake waiting to suck us in, devour us in one gulp; for the mystery surrounding God, is perhaps the last great mystery to be discovered on this earth.
Go ye by faith alone ... truth is ... faith cannot feed the belly, maintain a home, have a steady job or income. That's work, not faith. That's fact, not belief.
Yet, I am like many people that do believe there has to be some form of higher power for earth and people didn't come out of a crackerjack box.
I just feel that when God created this masterpiece in the beginning, he didn't forsee the problems that would come. Problems to this day, he still has no answer for.
Which briefly leads me to ... are there other gods.
To which, based on what I have here, I would say yes. Not the idol images say of Egypt (which in truth would be most confusing as they actually had over 1,500 different gods), but of the faith of followers base upon their own scripture they go by. I won't profess to say I know anything about these dieties, but what one believes, another may not. Herein are but a few.
Agnostics believes that nothing is known or can be known of the existence or nature of God or of anything beyond material phenomena; a person who claims neither faith nor disbelief in God.
Atheists are disbelieves, or lacks belief in the existence of God or gods. Yet they have their own beliefs on the existence of humankind.
There are three main systems of belief in China: Daoism (sometimes written Taoism), Buddhism and Confucianism. Chinese people did not adhere strictly to one religion.
Shinto ("the way of the gods") is the indigenous faith of the Japanese people and as old as Japan itself. It remains Japan's major religion alongside Buddhism.
Most Hindus are principally devoted to the god Vishnu, the god Shiva, or the Goddess. These practices are sometimes described respectively as, Vaishnavism (Vishnu), Shaivism (Shiva), and Shaktism (Shakti being another term for the female creative energy).
Muslims see Allah as the common Arabic word for God. In the English language, the word generally refers to God in Islam. The word is thought to be derived by contraction from al-ilāh, which means "the god", and is linguistically related to El (Elohim) and Elah, the Hebrew and Aramaic words for God.
The word Allah has been used by Arabic people of different religions since pre-Islamic times. More specifically, it has been used as a term for God by Muslims (both Arab and non-Arab), and Arab Christians. It is also often, albeit not exclusively, used in this way by Bábists, Baháʼís, Mandaeans, Indonesian and Maltese Christians, and Sephardi Jews. Similar usage by Christians and Sikhs in West Malaysia has recently led to political and legal controversies. Of this, I won't get wraqpped up in the politics of religion other than to say religion per se and politics have been sleeping in the same bed for thousands of years.
Looking at this from a different perspective, South Africa's religion is mostly Christianity. Whereas in Poland, they have no official religion, although a majority of the people are Roman-Catholic.
But all this is to drive home that there are other gods, so to say that there is but one true god is a misnomer. That would be like saying there is but one true race, and we should agree that that isn't true.
The years for me seemed to move slowly until I reached 66, and it seems in the blink of an eye I became 73. Because of this, I will tell you a secret ... something I just started recently as a month ago. Each night before I close my eyes and sleep, I whisper, "Is this the night where I don't wake up, God."
So, for all the words I put here, I still cling to a belief that someone hears me.
hate the word
people use it like it's a good thing.
"you have so much potential"
but then they weaponize it:
"if only you'd use it."
it's all about potential
isn't there something else this world
should be looking for?
we focus on the potential for good,
but there's always
the potential for evil
there's the potential to create a masterpiece
like a sculpture or a book
but there's also the potential
to create pain and death.
maybe we should stop focusing
and start focusing on what is.
maybe once we get rid of that
we'll start having less
of the wrong kind
I Call It God
I believe in one God.
You can call it
You can call on it
or not at all.
God is always there
inside and out.
You were made in God’s image.
God the ultimate creator
gifted you with whatever creativity
You can deny God
but you can’t escape
the energy of life.
It doesn’t matter much
what you think
believe it or not
anymore than you could
have stopped your birth
or believe your energy will go poof
Even the laws of science proclaim
that energy cannot be created or destroyed.
Bang bang...you're dead.
And even so
neither are up to you.
The easiest answer
the one humans have in some way
raising eyes to the sky in wonder
since the very beginning of time
as we know it
there is something greater.
I call it God.
Walking my Path Without any God
Before we start, I'll just throw in the ever needed disclaimer: I am not trying to change anyone's belief systems. I understand my personal beliefs can be seen as controversial at times, and although I may not agree with ones beliefs I fully respect them and am open to polite/respectful conversation on the matter.
Now, let's get to it. Personally, I do not believe there is a God, or 'higher up' being that has any set of 'rules' or teachings. This is due to the habits of people and the principles that most religions contain.
People tend to come with manipulation in many cases, and I find that for me, it makes sense to believe that religion was started by people who wanted control--whether they wanted control for the safety of their group, manipulation, or any other reason, I simply can't speak on. This makes sense in my mind because after years of searching and reading about different religions, so few of them put their God on the same level, or even remotely close to the people. The concept that I have an issue with is that one (or sometimes more than one) beings are so far above the people who follow them, to me, it has never felt like a real connection could be made.
The idea that there is a God, and God gives or takes something (usually afterlife) to those who do as God says feels like some kind of manipulation to me personally. Sure, I have a moral compass, and prefer to do the nice thing, but alongside my moral beliefs and compass stands the idea that any one being whom is said to be strong enough to create this world, and have these magical majestic powers, must be either strong enough to make everyone the good person that we all seem to strive to be when following a religion, or an extremely egotistical manipulative human being. Once again, just my personal thoughts and beliefs at this time in my life on God, religion, and kinda people, please don't take this as me believing I am correct, or as me telling you what to believe.
ROMANTICISM: THE TRUTH ABOUT LONGING
And, oh, the release of warm ache, the flow and the ebb of a living scarlet opaque, He took the need from me for my sake and I have recovered, give or take
I’m haunted, the urge does still plague my thoughts and my feelings, but it’s just as vague as the pale scars fading along my leg, deconstructing like a schizophrenic idea conveyed
And of aerosol’s bitter, misty love, I give it up to the one above, excise the impulse, no surgical glove, He uses no tools
Except golden forgiveness wrapped around spools as my tears of repentance collect in sorrowful pools, the last of the blood on the floor clots and cools, He breathes life into me
Finally, I can see that while filled with ethanol, I was utterly empty, drinking despite not being at all thirsty, trying to drown
But better to travel up than down, though there’s plenty of sin to be found in this tame little town, like claiming a virgin white wedding gown when you know good and well
Even if I never tell, my Morphine blue mood is something He can SMELL, chewing transdermal pieces of Hell when she needed them more
I had ‘a special place’ reserved before, that is until He spoke to me through my blackened door, He simply said, “No.”, just one word, nothing more, I stopped dead in my tracks
This was not another of my hallucinatory attacks, I choked on my chemically laced breath in coughs and hacks, doubled over, my lungs painfully wracked, expelling toxic fumes
To suffer forever in firey tombs with mothers who ripped their feti from their very own wombs without remorse and more in tune with satan, not God
Is what I was in line to do, when I swallowed Diazepam and 40 Benadryl, too, an unceasing tone and then I heard YOU, no panic in your voice,
“Go back…” and I had no choice, He didn’t want me yet, no, Ketamine helped hoist and somewhere far away, a lone angel rejoiced, it wasn’t my day
But, still, how I long for the way her embrace and her love gave me the courage to stay, her presence was a beautiful and singular sunray, guiding me through the dark
Yet it is for Him that I should hark, He kept me alive through every pill, every mark, all of the times when life was bleak, cold, and stark, He pushed me to persist
It is He who helps me resist all of the wickedness I used to kiss, He is there when everything goes amiss, and if I have faith, I have eternal bliss
I pray and I say please just let me sleep tonight away with restful ease, before head hits pillow, floor will be knelt upon on knees-
“Dear God…” and He instantly SEES
Truth is inherently Exclusive Otherwise, it’s only an opinion.
I got saved, (became a believer in Jesus), in August of 2015. That is a little over 5 years ago at the time of this writing.
If you asked me 6 years ago if this could ever happen, I would have emphatically denied the possibility. I believed that religion, especially Christianity, was false. I thought it was silly and made up.
I have to confess, I had no real reason not to believe in something. My life was in shambles. I was addicted to heroin. I had been in and out of jail. Been homeless. Sent to the psych ward on a 51/50 hold and generally tortured everyone who loved me, helped me, and knew me at the time.
Boy oh boy did I love to wax poetic about the state of our society. It was a wonderful exercise to blame everyone but myself for my problems. It was my DNA, I was born this way, my family history, the government set me up to fail, nothing is fair, and everyone else was corrupt which, in turn, excused my behavior. The longer I spent blaming everyone else, the worse I got.
I tried everything the culture suggested. Starting with, “let me do me, stay out of my business, doing heroin is romantic and artistic, do what feels good, etc., etc., etc.”
Truly, there was a time that I really was so self-absorbed, that I rarely thought about the effect I was having on anyone else. I didn’t care that I was throwing my life away. I was getting used to being processed through the Orange County jail. My conscience was going numb. I was losing touch with reality.
The crazy thing is…
I did everything they told me to.
How I felt superseded all things. Be popular, make sure you “sew your oats” I watched the perpetual adolescent male figure on television and in movies, and that was what I thought I was supposed to be like. Everyone experiments with drugs. Be with as many women as possible. That is what will define you as a man. Find a woman who will tolerate and support your charming idiocy and immaturity.
I stayed like a teenager until I was 30.
I became a Christian because my life depended on it.
Then, I found out it was actually true.
Be it sex, fame, fortune, substance, or simply status, man uses these things to satiate the spiritual cypher boiling internally. The eventuality of this declination is inevitable. The very thing used to fill the void exacerbates it.
We, as a culture, have been indoctrinated and have perpetuated the delusion, “I need something more.” We allow insecurity and selfishness to become the catalysts for the erosion of our moral fiber. We have no sense of belonging, gratitude, value, validity, or security.
Further, we have fed each other the fallacy that somehow the solution to our problems lies within us. How can it be that the solution lies within the same vessel within which the problem lies? Like it or not, the reason we all love the “self help” system is because it essentially makes us God. We are become the Divine. Who wouldn’t like that? How could we, the ultimate causers of confusion, calamity, chaos, and crisis, secretly be holding the key to salvation within ourselves? If only we’d unlock our potential.
Just examine the generation that stood against the “oppressive patriarchy” the “pull yourself up by your bootstraps,” folks. Unloving, unsympathetic, mean, and lacking in empathy.
However, aren’t the two ideologies essentially the same?
Perspectives differ, but the essential problem remains the same. We lack power. We do not have the ability to summon the power necessary to defeat evil. Plain and simple. No matter how you slice it. Evil has thrived, grown, and invaded our existence and we feverishly search for the answer to it.
This isn’t to deride human potential. Humans are capable of amazing, remarkable things. Created in the image of God and given gifts from which society has greatly benefitted. However, we need to understand the level of pride with which we suffer from. We need to understand the forces we are up against. It is of the utmost importance to understand that we are a part of the problem. If we understand this, and we understand that the answers need to transcend ourselves, then we have discovered a good thing.
Ultimately, we gasp and clutch our pearls as we become the victim of a self-centered crisis. This fictitious travesty, our victimhood, devolves from a fleeting thought, to an apparition, and finally to a demonic manifestation and reincarnation of our thirteen year-old selves. Impulse becomes the master. The search for comfort and gratification cloud out any rational judgement from consciousness. We deteriorate into a savages. We allow a warped perception fuel a base and misguided instinct. When these are coupled with insecurity and selfishness, satisfaction becomes priority. The search for pleasure blots out the reality of the harm we will cause from this descent into the darkness.
“Beware that, when fighting monsters, you yourself do not become a monster… for when you gaze long into the abyss. The abyss gazes also into you.” Enigmatic and poignant prose from Nietzsche. Can we imagine the countless hours of thought, the pages of literature, the gallons of ink, the exhaustion of breath, and the energy expelled, examining the seeming futility of the human condition? Essentially all coming to the same conclusion. You are the problem, and you are also the solution. I’ll save you the cost of admission to a seminar or the twenty bucks you’d spend on a book.
Countless people have sought gratification through indulgence and chased happiness across a desert of pain and loneliness. This vain transgression of avoiding the worst parts of ourselves accentuates those portions we would like to hide. The veil of comfort is sewn with thread composed of fear and denial. It is during this feverish and self-centered pursuit of, “meaning,” we are separated. This selfish quest is transformative and painful. Our current status, the goings on, and general madness are what it means to become the worst version of ourselves during the selfish pursuit of gratification and comfort.
I have spent a good portion of my time on this Earth restless, irritable, and discontented. I sought peace through chaos, I looked for comfort in pain, I searched for serenity in insanity. As I rummaged for relief I perpetuated my own deterioration and degradation. I became the monster I was fighting. My peers were baffled by my self-destructive and pathological behavior. I suffered from spiritual sickness outside the remedy of man’s faux antidotes. Fear ran through my veins like Mississippi creek water. Internally, a tempest loomed within my heart. A storm surged with tremendous power and I continually surrendered to the disaster. It was in the squall of temptation and insecurity that I developed a selfish propensity to assure that an instinctual need was met. This is always without regard to the consequence. There is never any consideration for the people hurt, the harm that is caused, and the general calamity in the wake of a man saturated with fear and insecurity. It is within this cauldron of self-loathing and ego driven madness that a convenient amnesia sets in.
What really sets man apart from beast is set within the deepest parts of ourselves. The knowing that our instincts cannot always win out over what is right, just, good, and moral. How blinded are we as a society when our culture is driven by instinct and instinct alone. This behavior makes us no better than the bloodthirsty monster. What’s more, is that we know better. We know what is civil, good, just, right, and moral. Save some grey exceptions. Our instincts are kept in check by our morality. The God-given and so defined foundation of our design. It’s is inarguable we are governed by a moral law. Even the most ardent atheist would have to agree.
The Faustian bargain is attractive. It is seductive and pushes men to the edge of morality until they plummet into obscurity. Souls die in the catacombs of despair and are deafened by a harmony of death rattles in a choir conducted by misery. Opposing temptation is warfare and there are lives at stake. This battle rages on and propels human beings to be in collision with one another. The friction is unbearable and the pain is extraordinary. Within this battlefield nomads wander and contemplate, “meaning.” We seek satisfaction and never consider the costs. To one extent or another we all participate in this battle. Our denial will be dressed as a conscientious objector with a white flag in hand, muttering deflated soliloquies about morality and curiosity. The foe is subtle and called many names. Some say it is just human nature, others regard it as a flaw in the mechanics and chemistry of the human psyche, still more believe this foe is Satan himself. This is the human condition. The legacy is a hopeless and painful vacuum.
The perpetrator may be unseen, but the consequences are not. These incidences are sketched almost lightly for entertainment within our culture. They are labeled as great works because of their parallelism with life. The Faustian bargain is cyclical. There is only one choice. We must search for a new pleasure to cover up the guilt from the last one. As his guilt escalates so do the escapades. The guilt, shame, and remorse, become a granite boulder fastened between our shoulder blades. We judge others for their flaws only because we hate ourselves. We pretend we don’t care denial becomes our code and we descend into the black.
The explosion of self-destruction is ignited self-gratification. It is only when the shroud of plausible deniability is lifted and we are forced to look at the destruction from our wrath that we see. Man, is constantly searching for his own definition. Autonomy, or “self-law.” This ideology rules the day. This search perpetuates a fatal disconnection from humanity. When we are consumed with ourselves we are lost. The monster becomes us. We freeze as the abyss stares through us understanding our weaknesses and vulnerability. The Faustian bargain is not a bargain. It is a concession.
Can it be said that looting, rioting, and destruction are a manifestation of what we truly are? Could it be true? Do you think the men who worked as Nazi camp guards were different from you and I? Do you think it is notable when the neighbors of serial killers are interviewed, and they point out that they, the killers, were nice enough, innocuous folks, quiet, and polite. Is it frightening to think of how many of us fit that description? Are we the monsters?
It’s amazing how quickly we humans convert from our faith in the Truth, “…not of this world.” This writer included. It is almost as if we were designed for worship. I saw a discussion recently on Twitter about theology. The young lady made a good point, in my opinion. She said, and I’ll paraphrase, something like, everyone has a theology. This gave me pause.
I’ve never participated in the arena of public discourse in any real meaningful way. I’m really just an observer, a fly on the wall. What I’ve seen is we cling to our belief systems, and world views for dear life. The life preservers for the drowning. Swords for the psudeo valiant keyboard conquerors held afloat by opinion alone. Fighting the ‘great war’ with a “hot take.” Posing as valiant and brave warriors whose powerful prose will vanquish the dragon and save the republic.
I’m not mad at them really. I think I have the same delusion.
It appears as though we embed ourselves within a particular kingdom, under a specific flag, representing a specific value system, and attitude. Through the valley of chaos we ride on horseback into battle. Swords raised, rebuttals, charts, facts, science, quips, takes, and the like raised ready to dispatch the evil hoard charging from the opposite side of the valley.
The big question can we prove God does not exist?
Searching for the truth to answer this question, it appears there is no evidence disprove there is a God. Only opinions of people form the answer that there is no God.
In the beginning, God... These four words are the heart of the issue. Most opinions which have been formed, there is no God. Therefore, I am not accountable to a higher power and I can live life as I want. No rules, then I can do what I want.
This idea can account for many of our social problems today. Human race created only man’s problems.
The facts that we exist shows there is a grand designer. Our Biological make up of multisystem with in multisystem, mathematically proves a designer. The magnitude of intelligence required is beyond our own, that a designer created humankind.
Evolution idea has its flaws and circle reasoning to conclude all of this is a cosmic accident. This is a very popular view today. Some opinions of people who believe evolution to be a fact, has not done their research.
Where does this leave us? We need to search out the truth, but how do we find this truth. We will not find it in religion, that is a fact. Even the Bible has only one scripture saying anything favorable to religion. Don’t take my word on it, look it up. That is the Point!
Prove that there is no God.
If there is a God, why does a bad thing happen to good people? This may be the wrong question to ask. How about why does God do good things to bad people?
If there is a God, he wrote the rule book on how to live. Then humankind has broken the rules, then there are no good people. People who do not believe in God are like the fool who says, “I do not believe in gravity.” He steps off a ten story building and gravity, a law of science takes his life.
God made the laws of Nature, Science, physics, even the God particle. All scientific facts... The Spiritual laws or Supernatural laws which are beyond our understanding... They too have a cause and effect not unlike Science. To violate them may cause harm or death.
My conclusion to the matter is life is not an accident. We all have a role and purpose in our lives. This is a fallen world and we should not judge God by his creation. His creation has become corrupted. God is perfect and desired man to be the same. God did not make robots, but humanity with a will of its own. He loves us so much he will let you destroy yourself. God being perfect cannot lie as a man. God is not surprised at what we have done to ourselves.
God desires a personal relationship with everyone. It’s a choice to believe the facts or turn a blind eye. The point is, if you want to know if there is a God, do not take anyone’s opinions, and look for the facts not that hard.
Reason To Believe
Often when reading what others have written on this site, I see God’s presence.
The lyrics of this old song by Frankie Lane give me reason to believe.
“I believe, for every drop of rain that falls,
A flower grows...
I believe that somewhere in the darkest night,
A candle glows...
I believe for everyone who goes astray,
Someone will come, to show the way,
I believe above the storm the smallest prayer,
Will still be heard...
I believe, that someone in the great somewhere,
Hears every word…”
A Lament for the Sick
Oh, cruel Fate, how came it to me?! I can no more unknow it, a glance never to be unlearned. Douse the fire within me and cast the carnal fervour from my flesh; quench this house of bone in ash and sand. Sleep! give unto me that eternal rest, erase the foul image that forsakes, as other than this I’ve yet been able to see.
Oh, mercy me! that I may come to rest in paradise. Mercy still in the torment consigned to flames of woe. Both nought and pity lost, spared neither by golden pasture nor fervent brimstone, man in blackness to be tossed.
Oh, how came it to be that I should know Death? Alas, I have supped of the poisoned chalice. I am His testimony enfleshed, the decrepit inspiration devised in cruel thrall. A misshapen creature, a monster shattered and horribly reassembled. In me is found a half-human soul, one that gropes at the immortal door hanging desperately on the knocker with redounding fist, and only at the last, to become an effort all for the amusement in rescinding.
Oh, that rocking brink of sickness, the vision I cannot unsee! How far beneath the feet lay that yawning chasm donning its full black immensity. Divert thy gaze to avoid the sight, yet sweeping across the face, the briny, wet breath of those depths rushing upwards in a mighty expulsion. At that same moment, so that all be one, a precipitous hand, cold as only Death’s can be, will thrust thy wrangled neck aslant the craggy fringe.
Caught and wriggling as on the hook that hangs above the gory jaw, I was compelled to stare into that unblinking emptiness so I might witness, in testament to His eternal creation, Expiry and Oblivion itself, that there existed no other side.