Every morning I curse the dawn,

Plodding through life as an automaton.

Little hope,

Hard to cope,

New art to remind me I must go on.

Am I a coward who can't face

The daily struggles from the moment I open my eyes or

Am I so courageous that in spite of this heavy unwillingness, I still rise every morning and face these mundane and almost ludicrous tasks?!

What is this?

Why is this so hard for me?

What is the ultimate purpose for this constant fight?

What for and for what?

Everything will inevitably end

Just like all roads lead to an end

A precipice?

A wall?

I would jump if I only knew the fear would cease

I would smash my face with all my might if I only knew the ache would stop

I am ready!! READY, you hear?!

So, please, come and take me

End this unforgiving battle

I am weary

I knew that I would wreck it,

I did it anyhow.

I begged my soul for mercy,

and yet it would not quell.

Until the breeze had smoothed the sail,

and it did it well.

I knew that I would wreck it,

blow it all to hell.

Tear it down and tear it down

until you couldn't tell

anything ever existed here;

the remnants barely show the tale.

There was no wreck after all,

just a fatal twist,

the only thing that died,

was a person who did not exist.

What is life

Without death

But a period of 

Wasted time

#life #death

i had all the time

spend it on candy

subversion ended eternity

i had endless dreams

perfect as they seem

subversion cut that endlessness

infinitely happy

happier then dog

subversion played out all that joy

turned my back

as you turned yours

guess who's the one that's happy

I'm walking

Carefully,

Because I

Still don't

Know what

I really want.

I just hope

That I won't

Break your

Throbbing

Little heart

With my

Recklessness.

The water is tepid

I am 

Emotionally numb

A carousel of

Never-ending circles

Painted horses

With gold tears and

A blue heart

Wading along the faceless

Dispositions excused from

Coarse action

I will drink the remains

Of you

Dissolving in the midst 

I'm breathing in poison

Trying to stay above water

But either way I'm dying,

A slow and painful death.

Should I die of torture,

Because I chose to fight?

Or will I die from bending back

To accommodate other's wishes?

I'm not sure that either way

I'll ever find the freedom to live.

Either way my life will end 

With bitter regrets and a tormented heart.

Flashing neons mirror pain in street puddles. 

Viper-like eyes flash and smile to prey.

Alcohol can be a sight aid and a bad advisor.

Silk and leather have true connotations.

It's easy to undo something meant to be undone.

A single bed can hold up to two people.

Simple discoveries are easy to make

In the middle of a night.