This life consists forever

Repeating my mistakes

Love, pain, lust, and sorrow

It's more than my heart can take

Eternal life seems powerful and nice

It's all you want, and all you need,

The power takes a hold of you

and leaves you with greed

So choose wisely my little one

Your wish is my command

Eternity is quite a long time

And It all starts where we stand.

Forever in love

Forever a lie

You were my one and only

And you didn't even try

Through thick and thin

I was loyal from the start

But you didn't care

And that broke my heart

Did you notice where it was?

My heart was with you to stay

And you destroyed it,

simply threw it away.

No song nor shared emotion

Will heal this broken soul

I was once a forgiver

But my life has taken a toll

Crippled, bruised and bleeding,

You left my heart abused

I don't feel like a trophy,

I just feel used.

So answer me this

What is love to you?

Is it a prank, a joke

Or is it what i felt, if you only knew

Ok ok ok ok. I know, i know. Ok. ok? Ok.

Something happened between you and me.

Something really really bad.

I REALLY liked you ok?

I don't think you understood that.

That day i felt something that i've never felt and never want to again.

Hearing that from someone other than you made it worse.

Finding out it was true from someone else made it EVEN worse

I lost my confidence and strength as a person.

Because of you.

You.

You are a part of this you know.

You can go ahead and forget but i won't.

I can't forget because it was my first ever heartbreak.

I can't forget because of YOU.

you .

You're in my head.

Haunting my nightmares

Floating in my dreams.

You.

But me.

Ya i don't care about that.

I “don't care”.

Truth is i do care.

Truth is i CARE a lot.

Every time i see you.

I feel...uncomfortable.

It's not the same feeling when you see me though.

When you see me.

When YOU know i'm there.

It means your thinking.

Thinking of me.

But that's not always good.

The way you replied to him about me.

The way you talked about me.

The way you talked about my friends.

Made me feel upset.

Made me feel like you truly are the person you said you weren't

You are that person.

But you know what?

I like that person.

And i couldn't ever say it.

As innocent as i can be

My fragile heart reminds

Of the one that kept me in his clenches

As we start to loose our minds

Isolated in this room

i am now a forever prisoner

Forever in this doom

And i just want to die

As i'm forced to watch his play

Nothing could ever describe

How i could be living with this guilt and strife.

I'm not allowed to watch the news

But i'm aware of what's happening

My parents are looking,pleading, crippling

He comes down the stairs

With a brown bottle and cigar

I feel scared and unsure

Ac ouple years pass

I sit here staring at a wall

The devil is on my shoulder

Right now i feel so small

The days start to pass quicker than usual

Thats because i've been saved,

The light, it looks so beautiful

I'm in a hospital with my mother beside me

The doctors ask some questions

They asked how many years was i gone, i guessed three

I'm safe and at home in my Boston city

Forgetting about the days of the past

The preachers made me

A man that i wouldn't  ever want to be.

I storm up the hallway stairs

I mumble a little but no one cares

I stomp to a beat of anger

1,2,3,4 then bump my shoulder on my coat hanger

My face red as an apple, in a hot shower of tears

Breaking down into a ball of fears

Crying because of all the strife

Thinking they ruined my life

I know they mean for the best

But i cried so much i had a pain in my chest

Maybe if i try to be better

I could wear the pride like an ugly christmas sweater

For now i just think i’m a crumb on the floor

Or that shirt you have that you tore

Guilt and shame runs through my veins

Starting to make me feel that way in my brain

Anger fear and shame are thoughts i feel

My carefree act isn’t real

Squeezing my coral colored pillow

I cry and cry in anger as billowed

Hot tears fall down my red cheeks

I've never let it out, it's been like this all week

Anger,stress, pressure, and sadness

I think i’m in a complete state of madness

Anger leads to hate, and hate leads to suffering

It's like the way my brain has been acting is buffering

Anger.

It captures you like a unknown stranger.

Apologies are hard to do face to face

But of course apologizing wasn't the case

Harassment is a felony you know

You might care a little but you won't let it show

Cyber attacks are common for you

But “just kidding” is how you view

This time it wasn't a joke

The friendship we had, it broke

Your dumb choices led you to madness

You got out of control, cause sadness

I warned them about you by the way

“I won’t do that again” you say

Talk talk talk is all you do

Is this the way it has to be? You choose

Cyber sexual harassment in the chat

I thought you were better than that

Your actions cause our lives misery

You can call this whatever you want, just not a victory

Excuses are like fingers

We all have some that linger

But behind my back?

Trust is what we now lack

Geez, i thought you could change

But you got worse, creepy, and strange

You’ve ruined everything

don’t even want to look at you, the strangest thing

I'm broken

From the words that were spoken

Just leave me alone

You’ve caused me pain, deep into the bone

Apologies.

I sit here daydreaming

Waiting, wishing

We share motions

It's feels like a love potion

You're in my head

It's just something i said

Im clumsy in love

I see the white dove

But word don't really mean a thing

I've broken the wing

Signals are just hand motions

When i'm with you i feel many emotions

The signal has been lost

The connection between us has been tossed.

The Night awakens

Daylight is forsaken

the darkness takes over

not many days are leftover

the end is near

we will die in fear

blood drips from the victim

its torture, they tricked them

The monsters take control

The supernatural will take your soul