A hellish descent
I walk upon the surface of a giant frozen lake,
I know it is dangerous to do so but I persist;
What gives me confidence is all that is not fake,
That is why I continue as the light dissipates the mist.
Captivated by the parts where the ice is about to crack,
I am driven there hypnotically, headlong;
I feel in my gut there is no coming back,
Although I am unspeakably strong.
The fall is steep, daunting and welcoming,
And I enter a tunnel full of fire and ice,
Uncertainty and contradictory desires. The spring,
I realize, is painful and will never suffice,
Unless I decompose everything and create a flowing dice.
Catching the wind
I am happy when I am not conscious about it. As soon as I rationalize it, it fades away because it cannot bare the prison of words.
To me from me
I have never been a fan of advices, though I have found some and they often are contradictory. I believe that is fundamental to listen to your inner voice, which is hindred by your overreactive mind.
So my advice would be to be couragoeus and just do something, try, experiment, which is a very difficult endeavour facilitated by turning off the critical thinking, at least whilst in the middle of writing, as opposed to outlininig, and focusing on the moment. It also helps to remember that you enjoy what you are doing and play the game for the sake of the game, so to speak, without goals and expectations. All of which is more easily said that done, no doubts about it.
I think overthinking is holding back most of us. Then there is the opinion of others, which is easier to ignore.
The hardest thing about life is the fact that we become attached very easily to our states of comfort, from which we are afraid to fall, thus we suffer a great deal, unable to accept the incessant change of life.
Alien and reversed kaleidoscope
I used to think that I am the controller of my destiny and my musings,
And that I am the observant who choses to watch all the reverberant images;
But I feel as I am a terrain which is periodically attacked by savages,
And my eyes are used to give birth to new worlds and flesh-like paintings.
It is complicated to talk about such things, for you always have the sensation that you are following cliches, and you usually do. I believe we suffer because we have some thinking patterns which we use to adjust and make sense out of the reality, and we suffer when they do not serve their purpose very well and lack exactitude.
Our ego is also a construction, as weird as that sounds, and it takes a lot of awareness not to let it control you and cause distress, which sounds more easy than it is. Yet I am convinced that whenever we experience deep suffering, we have to turn our attention within again and find the answer, and also view it as a symptom that our life needs some balance and some changes, and that it is overall beneficial but not bad.
I feel like the vacuum inside me opens up and is about to grab my future in its clutches.
We move in a predetermined way, like a clockwork. Our motivations are limited by what you, humans, attributer to us; but what if I told you that we are not as different as you like to think and our existence is correlated? After all, the universe is inside you.
If you always need motivation to do something, then maybe you should question whether you are living an appropriate life.