Death Understands Love
He's angry and I don't really care. No, actually. I DONT give a frickin fudge that he's angry. So what if my dad wanted me to marry him before my dad left? It's been four years, I have a happy life, I have a boyfriend who actually shows his face when my dad dies. I don't need this sorry excuse for a boyfriend, much less husband.
"You're fucking dating somebody?" He yells. I glare at him, I don't care enough to give him an answer. I don't care at all. Maybe when we were younger I would have cared. Maybe when we were still thirteen and flirting with each other despite the fact that I was dating somebody. " What happened to your fathers wishes of our marriage?"
I roll my eyes and look away. NOW he's going to acknowledge my fathers death. After four years? Four years of me sitting by the grave of my father alone? No. I'm not going to take that. So I look away, I don't want to talk to him. After four years of death and silence the only thing he acknowledges is that I'm dating John. Probably the only reason he showed his face to me.
"Answer me! The only reason I care is because I cared for your father. You little whore. You know what? I don't even like you, you're a brat, beyond words there is nothing to put you up. You hate your father huh? That's why you don't honor his wishes?" He screams. Now he's truly pressed my buttons.
" Oh, I'm the one who hates him? After being the only one to show up to his funerial? I'm the one who hates him? Who doesn't honor his wishes? after four years of YOU not even showing your face! Yeah, of course I'm not going to like you! At least somebody held my hand through the hard year of my fathers passing! And that wasn't you! You impertinent little.. Ugh, there is no words to describe you!" I scream right back. It's clearly a blow to his ego. He reels back a few feet.
When he starts to take a step forward I turn, whipping my hair into his face. I know it's painful. I've done it to a few people. It only hurts because I wear a braid with plenty of tiny little beads and decorations in it. I start to storm into my house. Thank the lord my mother isn't home. She can't handle this kind of stuff very well. She used to be able to before dad left us. Before we figured out that dad couldn't get a new heart, before the heart attack.
" You com back here! I am still in charge of you!" He yells. I snort. Un lady like, my dad would have had a fit if he heard me. But lately he hasn't been able to.
" Oh, please. You're not my husband, or my dad. Plus, you're younger than me." I say, turning over my shoulder but still walking off. I roll my eyes, right where he can see it.
" Only by five months and twenty-nine days!" He yells. I pause. I remember that day. The day that I told him how much younger he was. We were twelve. July fourth and under the tree at a corner to watch the fireworks. Well actually I was thirteen and he was twelve. On the fifth he would be thirteen with me. We were talking about many thing. Mostly how we could reach the speed of light using engines. Yes, we were two little geniuses thinking together. It was right after a water fight at his house.
Seventh grade was coming up. Right before it all happened. just before I asked John out. Yes, I was in band because it would help me get a scholar ship for law school. John was an eighth grader and we shared the same band class. I had a crush on him and we'd video call every night pretending to just be friends. Then, on one Friday night at ten o'clock I got on and realized he'd called me a ton of times and I hadn't answered because I was busy making dinner for the family with my mom.
We started playing truth or dare and he was trying to figure out who my crush was. So he finally dared me to ask my crush out on Monday. Monday came and we were talking on Gmail. Of course though he was extremely dumb and so I just plain out asked him. After asking him three different times in a way that technically wasn't asking. But it was at the same time.
And now we were still dating. four years of dating and I wanted nothing to do with Deegan. He upset me, didn't even try to say hi for four years and was now yelling at me for finding somebody that I actually cared about and they actually cared for me.
Deegan grabbed my hair from behind. I yelped and turned, using a few moves I learned from my brother to set him on the ground. Then I turned away to walk off.
" Oh no you don't." He growled and yanked me to the ground next to him. I hit my head on the ground But that's when I heard him. John was running up to me. My beautiful John. The one I loved most. He attacked Deegan full on. Turning him into a full on mess. i had to pull him away. And he hugged me so tight. I almost couldn't breathe. But John knows just how to hold me tight enough that he doesn't have to let go and still not tight enough to kill me. I know I'm in the arms of the one that I want, the one that loves me most, and that I love most. Nothing is going to stop that. Not even death wishes. Although I do feel a little guilty for not doing as my father wants. But he'd understand. Because John is mine, and I am his.
Songs of a Broken Heart
I had somebody once,
She was mine my rose.
I promised the universe to her
never thinking shed get stuck
stuck in something so big
yet to small to have any hole
I gave her my hand
told her to run
so we could run forever
with my heart in her hand
her heart in my pocket
I gave her everything
showed her nearly everything
and together we ran
we ran through fire and ice
we ran through light and dark
But something happened
we would be together forever
but she let go
somebody caught her
that somebody wasn't me
so I left her
I didn't want to,
but it was the only way
we're parallel to each other
seeing without sight
we know each other
I said goodbye
but my last message was never sent
sometimes I wish we'd had more time
but that would have made it harder
sometimes i wish I had said more
said more than just
Rose Tyler I
But she's my reflection now
I know shes watching in her dreams
and I watch in mine
we are mirrors of each other now.
Rose
I had somebody once,
he was mine my doctor.
I promised my world to him
never thinking he had the universe stuck
trapped in something he ruled
yet having no power
I toke his hand
he told me to run
so we could run forever
with his heart in my hand
my heart in his pocket
I gave him everything I had
we saw everything
and together we ran
ran through fire and ice
we ran through light and darkness
but somethings happened
we would have been together forever
but I let go
somebody caught me
that somebody wasn't him
so he left me
We didn't want to
but it was the only way
we're parallel to each other
and sometimes I swear I see him
see him in the mirror
I know him, he knows me
I said goodbye
but, he ended the message
I wish he'd stayed a little longer
but, that would have been worse probably
sometimes I wish he'd said one thing
that would make me his forever
I wish he'd said
Love You
but we're reflections now
I'm watching in mine
he's watching in his dreams
we are mirrors now.
- For every dr. who fan who's cried during Doomsday
The Mind Of A Writer.
Whirl pools of thoughts. Words splattered on the walls. Boxes and boxes of ideas tucked away. A story always being written no matter where it is. A story being led off until another one comes up. Reenacting everything from beyond and everything that is broken being glued back with perfect words.
Everything is in some type of array, always organized in such a crazy way you wouldn't think that it's true, but deep down you'd know. Perfectly build statues crumbling for no reason and being rebuilt to another thing. Ink is lying on the floor. But it's always there so it's nothing different. Although it should be dry it's wet, sticky, like somebody had just dropped it. Words smear over time without anybosy touching them, just making them barely good enough to read. Remembering it in a different wording just to improvise for everything that you cannot see.
She’s not Innocent
She walks up behind him and whispers. He turns in the chair to face her. So close together.
" You realize how close we are?" He asks. She gives him that smile. Naughty, but it's sly and looks Innocent.
"Yes."
" You realize what I could do?" He asks. She puts up that innocent facade, but he can see past it.
"What?" She asks, begging him to answer, being a sly little fox. They know exactly how to press each other's buttons even though they've only been together for a little bit, but they were friends in the beginning anyway.
" I could kiss you right here." He replies. She seems barely worried. No, she doesn't really care because she's daring him to. Wanting him to even though she shouldn't. Daring him in a way no other could. Pressing those certain buttons.
" Could you though?" She replies.
" I could." He's saying, although her smile is cruel it's so enticingly beautiful. Anybody would want to kiss that away.
" Could you? What if I pulled away?" She dared. She was testing, seeing if he'd comply to the dare.
"Oh, but you wouldn't." He replies confidently. It's driving her insane. He's driving her insane.
" You don't know, you haven't tried yet. You'd probably not do it, then never know. Or maybe you'd do it and I pulled away." She laughed. The dare was taunting. Without breaking eye contact he replied.
"You're hair's down." She smiles. She brushes through it, making it flare like it would have if he'd grabbed her and ran his hands through it. She was naughty for a seventh grader.
"It is." It wasn't a question. Neither of them noticed how the free time band class had gone quiet. People pulling out phones, taking photos and videos. Of course they would probably be the power couple of the school. Neither noticed the band teacher walk in and not let the door close because everybody had been waiting for this moment. Even though kissing was against the school code, she didn't care, the teacher thought this would be good, so she quietly watched.
" You little brat." He replied easily. At that she smiled, so naughty she was.
" You're pretty needy yourself." She replied. She waited, wondering whether or not he would actually try, or whether he wouldn't. He pulled back a little, as if complying to not take the dare. Her face showed a little bit of disappointment. Enough to make him know that she wouldn't pull away.
Quickly, before she backed away, he pulled her face to his. She was stiff for barely a moment before replying. He twisted out of the chair, body against body, a beautiful Reunion.
He softly ran his fingers through her hair, but she replied more fiercly, wanting more. Begging for him to quench her hunger. She was starving, and this was the first taste of him she'd ever gotten.
They pulled away, air is completely overated. She looks him dead in the eye and whispers loud enough for everybody to hear.
" I would have pulled away, you just surprised me." He laughed at her, slung his arm around her shoulder casually.
" Sure you would have."' He laughs.
Over Thinkers Already Know
I know it's wrong. I know because we're a grade apart. Most people don't make it through high school, did you know that? We're already only three months away from summer. Our time slowly running out.
No, it's not slowly running out, after all it's running. I already know how it's going to end. I've thought about it. In my imagination it hurts, and in real life it will hurt even worse, I know that for a fact.
How is it going to go though? That's what you're asking because you've never been that bright. Do you really want me to tell you? Yes? You're sure? Let me tell you under the may flowers and bright sun that'll evaporate every year I shed.
May
It's the last week of school, I want to wait. Although there is no more time to wait. I'm not going to do it on the last day of school. The bell's already rung and my best friend, she already knows. She's waiting. Only a few yards away because that's as far as I probably can get.
" Can I talk to you really quick?" I ask, but I already know you'll let me say what I want because, that's what we're supposed to do. So we fall into the hole, between three walls with only one opening and even though it's in plain sight nobody will notice.
" What's up?" You ask. I don't have much time, my numbing antidote is falling away quickly, and I know I'll start thinking soon again.
" I'm breaking up with you." I say. It's plenty loud enough for you to hear. But you're shocked, and I have nothing left to keep me numb. I'm already starting to think, that's nothing good.
" Why?" You ask, you're pained face is more painful for me, but I know that if I show weakness nothing will work out how I need it to. But I need my explanation.
" You're going to high school soon, and if you meet somebody that is awesome, that's good for you. I don't want to hold you back. It'll never have worked out any way, we both know that." I say quickly, this already hurts to much.
" Can I have one thing?" You ask. You know it's slowly breaking me, you know what you're doing, testing to see if I'll follow through, testing to see of you can stay, can keep me. I know it, and so do you.
"Yes?" It's only a whisper because I'm almost about to cry, but I can't. I just can't.
" One last kiss?" You ask, of course this is what you want because I once told you that you're kisses could be the only reason that I'd ever stay with you. I nod because there's nothing else I can do.
I take you're face in my hands. This isn't our usual kisses, this is way to gentle. I push you away gently. I make eye contact, I'm not going to cry. I'm not going to cry. I AM NOT GOING TO CRY.
I turn around, starting to walk away. My best friends right there. So I turn around and smile at you because I know if you see me cry you'll never be able to let go. I turn away. My best friend nods, that means you're gone, walking home. You're not going to turn back, that's not like you. I don't remember getting into her arms before I cry. I fall, I slip to the ground. I know why people say you have to love them enough to let them go. You can't ever be selfish. My tears fall around me, but she's there. My best friend hugging me, comforting me. So, why is it that I still am empty? Why is it that I'm like this even though I've known for so long how it'll end. So why don't I feel comforted?
″ Bad Luck” She whispered
We are all whispering. Not wanting the ghost to hear us even though we've agreed that she doesn't listen. Though she seems to see us, past the real people that fill the room. Ghosts shouldn't hunt us, it's not our fault we fell for these blindly let out lies. The trap skillfully woven just like a spider web.
Bad luck, that's what she'd whispered to all of us, the only thing we remember, other than how we let her become our ghost. She'd stuck me through the stomach and twisted. Bad luck was how we died treacherously, unjustly, and unlucky.
Mistakes to happy end
She had a crush, on a guy that maybe her friends wouldn't like. Although they did like him, maybe not if he become her boyfriend. So, she'd stuck as friends. Friends who video call all the time, friends who talk and sit next to each other. friends who know everything that's important. That's how it was.
It was a mistake. Playing truth or dare. Huge mistake. But, it had been late. She was alone awake which she'd always been. In her bed, watching her screen. Then she remembered, maybe he'd have texted her. So, she looked. She checked. And she shouldn't have.
She'd said she was sorry, she'd been hanging out with her Madre when he'd texted and called. She hadn't expected him to be awake at ten in the night. Everybody usually went to bed at nine, or even eight. So, when he'd replied she didn't say goodnight. She asked him what he was doing. That was a mistake.
They were both bored. So they played a game, of truth and dare and stayed. Always scared of the truth, she hid in the dare. Only until it wasn't fun and games. But it was to late, she'd sealed her fate. On one Friday night, something she could not fight.
She'd have to ask her crush out, she'd been dared by her crush. It's okay though because she had till Monday. So, she waited, abides her time. Soon domes day would come. And she'd definitely have to be ready, ready for the answer.
Of course he wanted a screenshot. So she'd agreed. That was a mistake.
She'd asked if he could tell her crush without telling him. He said sure. So she replied, if I told you everything this game would be over. He didn't understand when she sent a screenshot of that. She'd have to explain. She hovered over the keyboard, unsure.
" So, basically. . ." She thought for a second, how would she explain this. Then she opted for the easiest way she could. " Will you date me?" She waited one minute. Then asked, " Is that self explanatory?" He'd replied with a yes. But to which question. She shouldn't have asked.
" The first one" He'd reply. Now, how was she going to tell her friends. Well, it'd be okay in the end. All the mistakes led to one happy end.
Endless games
Truth or dare?
A question, a game that starts a flare.
daring, testing, seeing, making, I'll do it I swear
not knowing what I'd have to declare
Nerves and truths jumbling,
thoughts and words tumbling
hands twirling in a nervous dance fumbling
not knowing what's brewing, what's slumbering.
Truth is scarier than dare, although less fear
this is where it's played, just here
make my truth jumbled, my dare clear
swearing from embarrassment I'll disappear.
We always played, whether from boredom or from recklessness
staying forever playing, half in and half out, staying breathless
We never know how we'll become senseless.
Maybe in the next round because this game is endless.
Rosy silence
She wishes she could talk, but how is that possible
she's the wordless inarticulate
Sounds are to dull
He appears from a nook
Something that wasn't actually there
From a shadow in the wall
Brown eyes and black messy hair
warm and thin, not quite tall
His smile came from the sun
But his mouth never moves, never changes
faithful to her like a nun
beautiful, understanding like an angel
Until she's to cold
Until she cant remember her name
Finally into the darkness she'll fold
And nobody can ever come get her to claim.
After
She doesn't remember anything. She could have been here for so long. Maybe centuries. Although she couldn't ever be truly down here forever because he had promised her that he'd find her.
She still remembers, thinks about him all the time. It hurts her heart, it aches to hard. Sometimes all she can do is curl up here, not having enough energy to continue searching. Hades must be laughing from the throne, she thought. Truly though, Hades is on his throne, trying to get Will down here. Throwing so many diseases so Angela won't be so cold. She doesn't know anything about it, or why. But fatherly love can go through every being, including Gods.
Will is fighting to survive, only if because she had asked him once upon a time to come down with epic stories. Stories full of sunshine and adventure, full of nights and songs. She had always wanted to see a wolf, and not the tame ones. The wild treacherous ones that attack if threatened. Will had been searching for the beach if only because she had asked, even if he fell off the edge of the earth first he'd still find a beach.
Hades tries though, throwing wolves at him, tsunami's thanks to Poseidon, storms from Zeus, broken and treacherous animals and creatures that should stay in the underworld, only, Will thought that she would love every new story. Although he wouldn't die from it. Not yet.
Setting eye on the sea for the first time he almost drowned, but there was a dolphin of whom he clung to tightly. He'd gone to the front line of a war he wasn't even in. He'd found Medusa and killed her, never peered at her though because then he'd be stuck forever. He couldn't afford forever. He'd sold it to another.
Will had fought a witch, a wizard, and a guard. He'd torn down a kingdom and built it all back up again. Maybe, he thought, some Gods loved him while others didn't. He'd crawled through torturous, hunted down the TARDIS and set eyes on a blue rose, a violet rose, and a violet/blue rose. It was in his pocket, and before it withered he'd have to die, so he could bring it to her forever. A promise fulfilled.
Hades actually won that day. He owed it all to a bullet and knife. Will traveled through as fast as he could. Across the Styx River, basically pushing it himself. He cut the line without anyone noticing. He appeared from random nooks in towns that you'd never believe. He traveled as fast as he ever could because the rose, it would wither. It would leave him before he found her.
Will had climbed through the castle without being seen by anyone but Hades, though Hades never let him know. He'd given the rose an immortality, although it shouldn't even be down here. Hades wished the child away to the stones of a broken wall. A wall taken down by a monster years ago.
Hades was always one for romance, like Aphrodite, but nobody cared to know because he was so dark. Nobody like the darkness, nobody really ever wanted to accept it until there was no other choice. And although it sometimes hurt it was ok because when they came down they realized how cruel that world up there had been. They realized how cruel words had been after they were taken away. Souls cannot talk though because there is no mouth, nothing physical until wished into existence.
Will looked, continuing to search, picking up stories on the way. Until he found the brown eyed, brown haired girl he'd always loved. Reaching into his pocket he pulled out the rose. Even though he shouldn't be able to hold it he held it out, he didn't call out to her because she wouldn't be able to reply. So he appeared from a nook like he always had just for her because she loved it.
Her smile was so bright and beautiful he wanted to tell her the love he had, but she wouldn't understand, so he gave her the rose. And as it ripped through their fingers they smiled because even though there was pain, it wasn't supposed to be there. It meant something was keeping them alive, after death, and that was themselves. No it was each other. For all eternity will they hold the rose between them, the blended blue and violet rose, the beautiful rose to some, painful to the others. Just like the silence.
We’re Prose
Here is my folder, the space I need. Although it's not tucked into a locker or on a forgettable shelf. Always active and moving and reading and writing. The things that I love about life. And you never cross the same stuff twice unless you're really looking for it all over again.
Few people understand the notion of fake worlds you create and destroy. Nobody has the perfect imagination, but I like mine. Full of fun, horrors, villains and anything I really want. It's not really an outlet, because outlets take it and don't give anything back. Once you put something in it you can see it, but you don't get anything back from it.
I don't really have a word for it, but I do know one thing. That every time I put something in it, I get a lot more back. Comments that help succeed, likes that show love from other people who actually understand the books, and notifications( Which are annoying me because I cannot figure out how to delete old ones) that show what we need.
Prose are people who have awesome ideas based upon other things. Every challenge I enter is another fun world that I want to explore and write about. Every time I write, honestly I cannot help but to write more than one because I write one and then an idea is like, ohhh, look this'll be fun, it'll contrast.
Everytime that I look into this website I prepare myself for hours worth of reading, and a couple minutes of writing the first thing and then branching out. It's crazy what we do, how we do things. We do things like no other people, because we're the prose.