You hurt me once,

Then hurt me twice

felt so bad,

You apologized.

I kept so strong

but then I fell.

Down the

deepest,

darkest,

scariest,

Well.

You little snake,

you saw me break

right when

you knew I knew

You hurt me thrice.

And now…

Avalanching thoughts bring me truth

Make it stop

I want nothing to do with you

Because…

You stripped me bare

And saw me then

Caused my tears

and let them fall… again.

You heard me cry and didn't care

Watched me shake and closed your eyes

said I was the one that didn't understand.

So…

I walked out the door

And felt so low

because, I knew

You slept in peace

while I sat in the dark

and wept alone

Thinking…

For so long before

I didn't wanna see

Those honest lies

you kept feeding me.

So naive,

Chose not to believe

Those ugly crimes

you commited every time.

So why'd I stick around

even when I felt left behind?

I cared for you

How silly of me.

How much it hurt

my efforts burnt.

Shamelessly trying

to mend nothing there,

I smiled

I laughed

I cried

I died

Every time

a little inside.

A buff and shine

now a clear mind,

stitched up scars

now a beating heart,

Need you?

No.

Cuz now I see,

all I ever needed

was just really me.

Composed and collected,

now my words selected.

With a breath of fresh air

I no longer care,

I can finally breathe

I’m finally free.

I am happiest when I’m alone

I need those 25 minutes of peace on my daily commute where I’m completely enveloped in what music I’m listening to,

whilst daydreaming about all the things,

I never had the courage to say or do

I’m happiest when I’m alone,

And not strung out on your love

Waiting for the phone

to ring

There’s things I should’ve known

like when you turn a lover into a home,

One spark,

Can be the guilty flame that smokes you out.

I’m happier now when I’m alone

and I’m curled up in bed

With no sign of your notes or the polaroids we took on beaches and boats. My tides are high and the weather is changing, I’m the captain and I hold my own rope

I am happy.

To be alone,

In a world so full of opportunity

No longer gazing in the mirror of scrutiny,

Knowing that the words “I am enough” can spark change, create unity,

and if someone were to describe you to me,

After all these years,

I’d want you to be happy too, with me.

I see my mother's eyes staring back at me, filled with curiosity and passion.

I see my father's sharp nose pointing at the sky; knowledgeable and confident.

I see my grandmother's smile. Beautiful words always escape her tongue.

I see my grandfather's unruly hair. So big. So overpowering. It almost has a personality of its own.

I see my ancestors on the color of my skin. Similar to the Saharan Desert.

I see a girl at a loss of how her anatomy, her body, her being is greater than just a reflection on the mirror.

You're not just any girl dear.

You are the generations before you.

You represent nations, cultures, traditions.

Wear yourself proudly.

Look at yourself proudly.

You're the not the only person that mirror is reflecting.

I am tumbling

mumbling, stumbling

humbled as I crumble

dumped on my rump

numb as I slump

my mind reels and peels

in circles and bumps

slow motion

no notion of emotion

empty and weak

life is bleak

at the bottom.