The day I found an apology message in my unanswered chats because somehow. I felt my heart burst.

Finally…. someone had acknowledged their wrongs, for once, I wasn’t the only one shouldering the guilt. As I read, a strange emptiness settled in.

More guilt. I have been busy clinging to their mistake that I no longer knew how to see a deliberate hurt or not.

I sit on a bench, glancing back and forth,

The sun bathes the surroundings in splendor,

Highlighting the lively atmosphere,

Kids chasing one another,

Women lounging in leisure,

Teenage girls stealing glances at sun-kissed boys.

The giggles and laughter fill my ears,

Yet, I feel like an empty, useless soul,

Despite the joy, sadness creeps back in

The darkness persists despite the sunshine’s warmth,

It has found its roots in me,

Sharp and insistent.

Tears stream down my cheeks

Perhaps due to the breathtaking scene before me,

Or tears of joy, I am not sure,

But deep within my heart,

The feeling lingers on,

The feeling of missing a soul.

When I was young, every single glance meant something, a single touch, a single smile, an accidental glaze of shoulders, a simple inquiry of how I am doing…I would magnify it into something big.

Maybe I was desperate or crazy. I was a big romantic, I dreamed of someone of my own who would turn my fantasies into my reality. Someone who would be outgoing, hold a conversation, a great host if we had a party and who would not mind my awkwardness.

But how could someone notice me when I didn't stand out? or even wanted to. I didn't fit the mold of a typical romantic interest, and my introverted nature made it hard for others to connect with me. I wasn't into social media, trends, makeup; I preferred the background. If someone showed interest in me, I would avoid them like plagues. My conversations felt forced, and my moods were unpredictable.

After trying tried too hard masking myself only to end up in disappointing relationships, I gave up. Maybe it was true that not all of us can find love. Perhaps there is a reason for the supportive, ever-present bestfriend in every story. There has be to that plain and unassuming character.

1. "Demons" by Imagine Dragons

2. "Happy” NF

3. "Hate Myself" by NF

4. "Trauma" NF

5. “All for us” Labrinth

6. “Human” Christina Perri

7. “Tying My Best” Anson Seabra

8. "You Don’t know" by Katelyn Tarver

9. "Hold On” Chord Overstreet

10. “Flicker” Niall Horan

11. “Let You Down” by NF

12. “Miracle” Labrinth

13. “Life, I am Over You” Zevia

Verse 1:

In the depths of his soul, demons took hold,

Addictions and disorders, stories yet untold.

He fought with every ounce of his might,

But the worst enemy he faced was his own endless night.

Chorus:

Oh, the battle waged within his troubled mind,

Therapies failed, and meds couldn't find

A way to silence the screams in his head,

As he stumbled through the darkness, alone and misled.

Verse 2:

Nosey neighbors, gossiping tongues,

Misunderstandings and judgment clung.

He couldn't explain the horrors they heard,

His nightmares trapped him, the truth obscured.

Bridge:

Bloodshot eyes, a sign of his plight,

Insomnia's curse, not alcohol in sight.

He grew accustomed to their stares and disdain,

But wondered if his children viewed him the same.

Chorus:

Oh, the suddenness struck like a knife,

As the children's service arrived in his life.

He couldn't confess the battles he fought,

For fear it would worsen, his sanity distraught.

Verse 3:

Beyond the furnishings, colors so bright,

Love permeated that house, hidden from sight.

But they took them away, his reason to live,

Leaving behind a hollow life, no solace to give.

Bridge:

His job once a refuge, a place to find peace,

Now a blurry haze, focus began to cease.

Regret seeped through his veins, a constant ache,

As he faced the consequences of his mistakes.

Chorus:

Oh, the shadows of regret cast a long, dark pall,

In a life now empty, he yearned for the call

Of laughter and joy that his children once shared,

Leaving him alone, broken, and emotionally impaired.

Outro:

In the echoes of silence, he stood all alone,

A shattered soul, with no place to call home.

He clung to the remnants of a life once whole,

Lost in the shadows, regret taking its toll.

As the sun ascends from the east,

A tapestry of orange engulfs the sky,

Memories etched in its radiant hues,

Promises woven with each passing day.

Happiness resides not in mere dreams,

But in the blessings, we hold dear,

Those who fill every precious moment,

Whose absence leaves a void too clear.

In our envisioned frames of the future,

They find their rightful place,

Their presence, a beacon of solace,

An embrace that time cannot erase.

Together, we face the depths of fear,

When the world wears a smile,

In their eyes, we glimpse strength,

For they understand us, free from guile.

A call that holds no agenda or cause,

Just a simple query, "Are you okay?"

Year after year, we draw them close,

Sharing triumphs, marking each day.

And in their patient souls, a virtue unfurled,

They become irreplaceable, the rarest of gems.

For in a world of haste and restless whirls,

They offer solace and tranquility, like diadems.

With steadfast calm, they weather life's storms,

Guiding us with unwavering grace.

Their gentle words, like healing balm,

Bring peace to our tumultuous space.

In moments of chaos, they stand serene,

Their patience an anchor that keeps us strong.

They teach us the beauty of waiting unseen,

And with understanding, right our every wrong.

In a realm where instant gratification reigns,

Their presence is a beacon, a resolute sign.

Their patience, a testament that remains,

That their love and worth are truly divine.

No happiness greater than a life embraced,

With joy, laughter, and love by our sides.

In their company, our hearts find solace and rest,

Forever grateful for the love that abides.