the final straw
I’ve heard of the place, planned to visit, but never thought I’d actually move there.
Today I became its newest resident.
The pharmacist apologized profusely because my insurance suddenly refused to cover my medicaton any longer.
Medication I have taken for many years.
Medication that my insurance has had no issues paying for prior.
Medication my primary care physician adorably calls “maintenance medication”.
I placed my hands on the counter and leaned toward the pharmacist. The poor man winced and visibly steadied himself for the oncoming barrage of verbal abuse. But that's not what was unleashed upon him, much to his surprise. Instead, I told him in a very quiet voice, “It's okay. Thank you so much for trying to help me.” And I walked away.
I will never go back.
Fuck that medication. It was not a matter of cost. I can afford it. It's the principle.
This minor inconvenience was the final straw. I just quit taking it. Dear reader, please do not be alarmed. I will not die, nor will any harm come to others if I quit taking it. Contrary to what the casual observer may assume, I am not on any psychotropic medication (whether or not I should be is beside the point). The medication is for a chronic, benign condition and my insurance being assholes about it flipped a switch for me.
I do not care any longer. To any thing/person that offers resistance of any kind, I resolutely flip you the bird and move on. I don't fucking care any longer. I have no more energy or want.
From today on, I am a permanent resident of ZeroFucksLandia.
unbroken
Human driftwood
Grasping
At gauzy mesh dreams
Wrapped in crumbling stardust
Trading stability
For shifting nameless peaks
How I would love you
Like no one else has ever loved you
And I know you sense that too
But I cannot corral you
I cannot hold you
To keep you in captivity
Is wrong
Your spirit is best left
Alone
Beautiful
Unbroken