Please Care
I guess it's my fault
For always pushing,
And for always saying
I'm okay when I'm not.
It's just that somewhere
I got lost in my own head,
And I didn't think
Anyone would ever notice,
But then I found one person
Who could read me like a book,
Except that you're not him,
And he never answers my calls.
I'm not asking you
To catch a bullet to the heart,
I'm just asking you
To notice my pain,
And to care
That I'm lonely,
And to hold me
When I'm falling apart.
I'm just asking
For you to do the things
That made me fall in love
In the first place.
And There Was Light
There is a peace
That comes over the soul
When nature paints it's canvas
When the sun begins to ascend
As it's light illuminates
Underneath a cloud covered sky
I look in awe at the magnificent colors
At the twisted cloud formations
That scatter their texture endlessly
For 8 minutes, I've never seen such a sight
But slowly, the colors fade
Into gray and blue, heavier than before
The sun hides, blanketed by overcast skies
The clouds weep, in anticipation for it's return
But it is nowhere to be seen
And then it appeared, more amazing than before
Descending like the Son of God from Heaven
Casting hope to those with dark and heavy heart's
The colors were endless, as they fell upon the landscape
They danced with excitement
As if they touched everything the eye could see
Mesmerized, I watch as the colors deepen
The orange and pinks, become deeper and fuller
Every second that passes, brings more depth to this canvas
I quietly wait and I watch
The colors begin to fade, yet again
Which only brings anticipation for the light of the morning
Dissolving Love
Mercy was sought on my knees
Sequestered to the riverbank
My flesh muddied and bruised
Sharp rocks cut my suffering
I slice into my weakened arms
Blood and tears drain from me
And rush away in baptismal sorrow
My soul washes clean you absorbed
Of the deep heartache and despair
And your beautiful face is reflected
In the crimson pool of my heart
And traveling away with the current
Mr. G
dear mister gee
i think you owe me an apology
about ten years ago you took something
very important to me
i could not think of what it was
i could not feel
i dared not pause
i searched through my collections of rocks and stamps
i stayed up every night by the light of my
searching lamp
i always thought so highly of you
your son was in my first grade class
and second too
he was a funny gap toothed boy
and
like your pretty wife
he was a decoy
Mister G, I promise you,
as long as I live I will not forget.
Every scar,
every deformity,
every grotesque, phantomic bump on my body
aches with your residual touch.
My heart knows treachery;
My body knows invasions;
My innocence knows murder;
My tongue holds stories of injustice and
slaughter and
I will remember.
I will always remember.
Destination, Further
faking breaking oscillating, separate
the thoughts we're scraping on pads
with pens and false intent, footsteps
follow without relenting, the hope that
grows with groans of hearts misspent
never finding permanence but ever
fleeting dead content sent below to hands
that rent souls with holes of mold and
troves by stacks of traps but heaven looks
with eyes of black that track my foolish
planning spanning decades old flames of
burning methane and shine in time for her
when home is reached a place called futher
Fade away..
I am not lonely
I am not sad
I am not angry
I am not depressed
How can I express my feelings
Being secluded in a far off place
So cold and so dry
I want someone to be here
But there is no one
I am about to fade away
I want to talk to someone
I want to pour my emotions
Please don't let me fade away
I cannot handle all the blurs
And the emotions pouring out at once
Or I will fade away....