Imagine That
Imagine this for a second
Being a young woman, pregnant at 15
Not really sure how to do the “mommy thing”
But you handled it gracefully
Life happens again, 3 years in a row
’90, ‘91, and ’92
And before you knew it, you had a dope ass crew
Imagine years going by and thinking “I’ll give it one more try”
And now it’s ’95 and you’re a 24 year old mother of 5!!
Imagine 5 different attitudes
5 different birthday parties
Imagine working and going to school, to feed 5 mouths
Imagine barely seeing those 5 faces
Because you had to creep in after bedtime
And be gone before they woke up
Imagine losing your career in 2008 and praying to God
Then getting blessed with your OWN BUSINESS in 2009
Now imagine thinking, “Aw shit, I’m finally getting the hang of this!”
Then turning around and adopting 6 MORE KIDS!!!
Man life got crazy quick!
In the midst of all of this, that original 5 gave you 10 GRANDKIDS!!
Imagine sitting in your room at night
Crying and begging God to make sure you’re doing it right.
Imagine being told you’re not good enough
Imagine being a diamond in the rough
Imagine facing adversities, while dealing with your own demons
But still SMILING!
Imagine doing all of this, and STILL reaching your 10 YEAR BLACK OWNED BUSINESS ANNIVERSARY!!!
11 kids, 10 grandkids, and a booming business
Now let’s be honest, this shit sounds hectic!
Some may call a woman like this insane and maybe even crazy
But I call her MOMMY and let me tell you
You are the SHIT to me lady!!
You are blessed, you are STRONG
And Lord knows you are patient.
It was hard to imagine that life, huh?
Hell, I couldn’t imagine it either.
But my momma, my BLACK QUEEN does it FAITHFULLY & EFFORTLESSLY!
Nostalgia
Take me back
Back to when the street lights were our curfew
Back to when we’d coming running down the street, when we heard mama holler.
Take me back
Back to when we’d ride bikes for HOURS
Back to when we played Hide-n-Go Seek
(the seeker would always cheat!)
Take me back to breaking the fire hydrants open and packed pools on the hottest days.
Take me back to bundled coats and Vaseline soaked faces in the winter
Spending all Saturday playing sports at the Riverside Family Center.
Dance contests with our friends, playing curb ball, eating popsicles, playing Crash Bandicoot.
Take me back to Kenan and Kel, ALL That, and HEY Arnold
Back to B.E.T Uncut and Tales from the Crypt
We knew we shouldn’t have been watching that...y’all we were a trip!
I Am Me
I Am A Woman!
I Am A Black Woman!
I LOVE My Chocolate~kissed skin.
I LOVE My stretch marks!
I LOVE My wide hips & full lips.
I Embrace My thick thighs.
I Adore the way My cheeks rise when I smile and nearly close my eyes.
I Love Me!
I Adore Me!
I Embrace Me!
I Owe it to myself to live AUTHENTICALLY!
So I stride through life MAJESTICALLY!!
That’s Who I’m Raising
That 5 year old girl, that 1 year old boy
Teaching them the way of life
Teaching them when to fight
Fight for themselves and each other when they can
And understand that I will go toe to toe with ANY man when they feel they can't
Teaching them to love themselves
Love that melanin you were blessed with
Don't let them tell you when your crown needs to be adjusted
To my little black girl, you will be great
Because no stereotype will determine your fate
To my little black boy, you will go far
Because strength was embedded in you before you became who you are
Don't fear snacking on your Skittles, or drinking your Arizona Tea
Don't fear taking a knee
Don't fear recording injustice
Don't fear speaking up for us
Because y'all are the voice...
The voice of the lost, the hurt, the confused, the broken
Some may look at me and ask,
"Who do you think you're raising...because your delivery is quite brazen?"
Well here, let me break it down for you.
You see that little black girl, she is
Charleena Lyles, gunned down while pregnant
7 YEAR OLD Aiyana Stanley-Jones, gunned down while sleeping AT HOME
India Kager, just an innocent fucking bystander riding home with her family
That little black boy, he is
Botham Shem Jean, gunned down by an intrusive BITCH with a badge...IN HIS HOME
Trayvon Martin, chased and gunned down by COWARD with a badge
Victor White III, shot and placed in handcuffs as a cover up
Lest we forget Sandra Bland, Tamir Rice, Eric Garner, Tanisha Anderson, Michael Brown, Yvette Smith, and unfortunately so many more.
This is OUR truth, and part of OUR story.
So pardon me, no FUCK THAT...PARDON YOU, if I seem brazen
But that's who I KNOW I'm raising!
Can You Hear Me Crying?
Came into the world, a healthy baby girl
Smooth skin, kinky hair, brown eyed beauty
Encompassed by my mothers love
Can you hear me crying?
Going to pre-school, eager to learn
Standing in the bus line, awaiting my turn
Momma was worried, I got on the wrong bus
Can you hear me crying?
Middle school, I obviously wasn’t popular
Dark skin, wore glasses, tallest girl out there
Getting picked on & bullied, those days were horrifying
Can you hear me crying?
High School, I played sports
Lost games, lost friends, went through things of all sorts
Momma was there FRONT & CENTER, no denying
But you...Can you hear me crying?
College came and went
Had 2 beautiful babies, who cherish all the time MawMaw has spent
Playing with them, and loving them
Giving them all the love grandparents should be supplying
Can you still not hear me crying?
You missed all of this, and anything more to come
Because Momma was ALWAYS there
But you...you placed me last against EVERYONE
I hope you get what I’m implying
I bet you wish you heard me crying.
Appeal To Yourself
Brush your teeth, wash your face, fix your hair
Grab you best outfit, don’t forget the shoes
Accessorize & moisturize
Standing in the mirror, admiring your hips
Hyping yourself up with an occasional “YASSS BITCH”
Curling your lashes, glossing up your lips
Queen Bey playing in the background & giving your Buttercream Chardonnay a sip
But after you’ve zipped your dress, strapped up your heels
You double back past that full length mirror & you question yourself
Did I do this for me, or did I do this for someone’s son to be pleased
Realizing you didn’t do this for you,
You kick off your shoes, wash your face & put your dress back in its place
Wrap your hair up & throw on your bonnet
Just to climb in your bed and write this sonnet.
PROSPEROUSLY
She was shy & timid
She was quiet & meek
She was insecure & felt unpretty...yet
She grew & gained a smile.
She began cracking the shell
Coming from beneath her rock
Attempted to leave home
Go to school & gain some knowledge.
And then college......college
Ya know; the temporary home away from home
Campus encased by train tracks
Inside those tracks, she felt secure
But outside those tracks she was hurt.
She was raped, she was mistreated
She was an object, she was shamed
She hid again & cried endlessly
She lost her smile & felt silenced.
But eventually....
She began to trust again & let people in
She became a mother & learned to love
She learned patience & gained poise
She refused to be a sexual ploy.
And now.....NOW
She is beautiful & graceful
Sexy & sassy...how do I know you ask me?
Because I am Her & She is Me
And I am taking on life
PROSPEROUSLY