Love is a verb
As I was walking down the street the other day, I noticed the following sentence written on the sidewalk in big white block letters:
LOVE IS A VERB.
That made me smile and think yes, yes it is.
Yes, it is also a noun: deep affection. But, for that phrase to actually have more substance than the breath you expel upon saying I love you, there must be actions to give it weight. To give it meaning. Love cannot live in words alone if they are not to fade away to nothingness, or worse, twist and rot in the absence of actions or in the face of actions that put lie to the words.
What those actions might be, that demonstrate that love, are myriad and multitudinous...and quite personal to each individual.
For me, it is bear hugs. It's the words said every day, multiple times a day. It is standing on the porch waving as a loved one drives away. It's baking someone's favorite dessert, preparing homecooked meals. It's listening, accepting those you love as they are while encouraging them, supporting them to be their best selves. It's compromising. It's remembering things that are important to your loved one. Doing things for and with your loved one.
Sometimes it's sacrificing - time, energy, money, sleep for your loved one.
Nurtured, it will grow and strengthen. Blossom. Evolve.
Limited to words belied by actions - or inaction, it ceases to be love.
On the Dastardly Nature of Human Mating Practices
Humans are peerlessly ridiculous creatures when it comes to matters of the heart.
Oh, don’t get me wrong; other animals have rather silly mating rituals as well. If you’ve ever seen a bird of paradise hopping up and down displaying extravagantly radiant plumage and flipping himself backwards in an attempt to impress his picky courtesan, (only to be quite literally crestfallen upon her disapproval) you might understandably get the impression that human love is somehow sensible, demure, or rational by comparison...
It is not.
The clues are in the language: We don’t ever decide to love. We fall, we are swept, we are struck.
Einstein once said “When you trip over love it is easy to get up, but when you fall in love it is impossible to stand again.”
So, even at the highest levels of cognizance humans can muster, there still appears to be very little choice involved in a physioligical reaction to attraction. I mean just look at us; we’re a bunch of hopeless, drooling, swooning lunatics. Anything is liable to set us off.
And having a passing aquaintence with the biological fact that these high flung feelings of enamoration are due mostly to procreation instincts won’t stop your heart fluttering or your stomach flipping or your cheeks blushing or your loins aching for whoever happens to strike your perilous fancy.
Oh yes, you’ll fall. It’s only a matter of time.
And to many of the most drooly, swoony, rabidly romantic members of the human race (myself included) nothing is so worth the tumble. For it is through this embarrassing display of honest emotion that you develop an attachment to people; start caring about them, as more than pleasantly amusing fellow dilly-dalliers.
Then finally, after many years of primarily-senseless floundering in the shallows of adoration you’ll settle down and start a family. At which point, if you’re lucky, you get to dive to the bottom and discover what love actually is:
A gigantically mesmerizing, frightfully fretful, deliciously demanding, stinkingly ecstatic, tumultuously tearful, hulkingly hellish, simperingly stupifying, bountifully beautiful great big bloody brilliant mess.
Or, to put it in less painfully cacographic terms:
Love is what makes life worth living.
Haiku Love You
Silken soft kisses
unfolding like earth flowers
blossoming to love.
* * * * * * *
The Four Letter Word
Google defines love as: an intense feeling of deep affection, or a great interest and pleasure in something [“his love for frosted ear muffs” for example]. This definition assumes one understands what ‘affection’ is. Also ‘feeling’ and ‘intense.’ What exactly is “intense,” and what measurement of it qualifies? 11? What’s a feeling? How do you want to put a definition on that?? I have a feeling that my suspicion of the sense of premonitions is a sentence that means totally zero.
We can say that love is good. Mostly. Sometimes we can love too much. Sometimes we don’t love enough. We should really care about a lot more things in life but we don’t love them enough to risk financial woe and ridicule to do so. Like for example Earth.
So we can’t really say love is good.
Does that mean it is bad?
Hmm, few would argue for this idea, but if one is attempting to climb the career ladder for example love can get in the way. Love is also certainly most probably possibly bad if extended within a toxic relationship. Also if one feels compelled to extend into something toxic if you know what I mean. Ouch!
But that is neither here nor there.
What matters is that the definition of love, no matter where one looks, is vague. There is neither agreement nor clear answers to the question. Coincidentally, it mat be noted that love is also not the only word without a clear cut definition. Religion also enters a gray area; it means a lot of things for a lot of people and most can give examples of religion (where is the italics option in this newfangled version of Prose?) but ask any 27 people what religion is and they will stare at you, unblinking, with saliva slipping from their lips, until the start of wrestling, or it is time for a Twit. True story.*
I’m going to assume that the term “God” falls under the same category, although there is no reason for me to do so.
The point is: if we cannot define love, religion, God, good, bad, respect, gratitude, hope, freedom, compassion, mercy, up, down, in and out, of what use are these words? And without the words, there is no place for any of these ideas in our lives.
Welcome to the Brave New World!
Another option: try not needing a definition, and just let it happen. It's more natural, more effective, and more intense that way. Enjoy it, don't destroy it, which rhymes!
I was asked to define love
it’s simple math
where the equal sign
lands between you
and those who accept you
and would save you
in a burning room
A game of dillusion
I fell in love.
I played the game of discussion.
Loyalty is all I needed.
Cheating is all I got.
The truth is love is undefinable. You love your family and your friends and your pets. You love romantically too. People say they are different types of love, but I don't believe so. Love is undefinable because it is the definition. It is the name you put to feelings of undying loyalty and trust. You can't stop loving people. Once you feel it, it's there for good. You can stop liking people or stop agreeing with them, but once you love them, it's permanent. I believe you have different relationships with different people, but the feeling underneath is the same.
I'm a daydreaming high school girl. Romantically, my experience is limited to one girlfriend who broke my heart a year ago, a current crush on a straight girl, and plenty of straight boy's numbers.
So romance isn't quite right for me as a teenager. But love? I'm not even sure where to start, so I'll just write all my thoughts.
Thinking of all that I love: my little brother, my sisters, my mama, my best friend, my cross-country friends, my soccer friends, reading in class, my English teacher, crocheting, baking, the book "Toil & Trouble: 15 Tales of Women and Witchcraft", the teddy bear I haven't been able to sleep without for a decade, my coworker who's like an older brother, Taylor Swift albums, my green and white sweatshirt, my weighted blanket, my letterman jacket, the library, autumn air, summer air, winter air, spring air, rainy air, sun-soaked air, salty air, even humid air, my bulletin board, stealing my sisters' clothes, wearing a watch, writing, feeling like I belong, talking about my feelings, learning Spanish, making too many Spotify playlists, running 8 miles so hard that I forget everything except happiness mixed with pain.
There's so much more, more than I could ever write, more than I could even remember, but that list seems to be a microcosm of my life, if you will.
I suppose the next step to answering your question would be to figure out what all those things have in common. Let me think. None of them are ground-breaking or unique, they're just the things I surround myself with. Maybe some of them wouldn't be so special if I didn't love them. Maybe it comes from me; me being a lover first, and everything being loved second. So maybe love doesn't have to be that deep, and it doesn't even have to be about the thing being loved. It can be about you, the lover, having so much love in your heart that you'd fully love something as simple as a ladybug on the bleachers.
I hope this makes sense. I just started writing and I have so much to say. Thank you for reading <3
What love is (or isn’t)
Love isn't patient or kind.
It doesn't conquer all,
and it definitely isn't blind.
sometimes kissing and making up isn't the solution,
and sometimes it is best to just walk away.
Love definitely DOES NOT mean
never having to say your sorry.
Love isn't butterflies and sweet dreams,
and happily every after.
Sometimes love is knowing you can't be together.
Sometimes love is laughing until you cry.
Or crying until you laugh.
Love is not accepting people for who they are,
but growing together.
Talking into the wee hours of the morning.
Sometimes love is mourning.
Love is fast and hard, and slow,
and no matter the measure it always leaves you wrecked.
Love is making the commitment to do what's best for you both.
Walking away, or making it work.
Nothing and Everything
Love isn't never needing to say you're sorry. Love isn't the electricity that stuns your brain and moves every cell in your body into submission. Love isn't unconditional. Love isn't the melding of souls. Love isn't the little things.
Love is the sum of all but nothing in particular. Love is all the emotions and feelings without the drama and destruction.
Love isn't just anything...it's nothing and everything.
Or at least that's my two cents;-). Good luck with finding an answer @Riley_45 !