I immediately fail this challenge as I am loath to create a fake username to hide behind, even though Yowwa is not my name it is how I am referred to by my biggest (and youngest) fan.

So then, here is what I would only tell a therapist, except it isn't as I'm telling you all as I do not have a therapist.

1. I self harm (though not with knives or machetes or other horrendous weapons. I smoked for over forty years and can attest to the harmful effects of nicotine. I no longer smoke, but I Vape, and in so doing I inhale nicotine which is a highly toxic poison. Hence, I self harm.

2. I often get deeply depressed about myself. I believe this stems from my past, either that or I am by nature so inclined. Often I am so deeply mired in depression I think of suicide, but have so far managed to reason myself from carrying it out.

3. I once kissed a man full on the lips (though it wasn't true love, it was for a bet). And he had a moustache which made it all the more hideous.

4. There is no 4. (Thank you Monty Python for that).

There is no therapist.

There is no trauma. There is no suffering. There is just this, and this, however named, is perfect. All is perfect. Perfect stillness, perfect knowing, perfect being. It is only when perfection incarnated, nirvana as samsara, forgets this one and only truth of perfection, of just this, that imperfection manifests and induces unnecessary pain - suffering. But upon recollection, perfection incarnated soon becomes reliberated from all previous suffering. All karmic debt, all psychological wounds, are instantly relieved consequent to this ultimate recollection, similar to recollecting a nightmare is not real.

Reality is perfection, and you are reality.

To my therapist? The last one quit because of me. I have no problems, really, aside the fact I wonder sometimes if I'm bi, which I believe is just overthinking.. I look as life's problems as a little challenge. I DARE you to get over her. I BET you can fix your grades. Struggles suck for a little while, but that's what makes them more fun to be fixed! So what'd I'd tell my therapist? I don't know what part got him. Maybe it's when I tell him how my day is going, maybe it was when I told him my life story. Maybe it was simply how I answered his questions. Either way, he looked at me like I knew everything, like how dark the world is. He knew I know something twisted as hell about everything. Yet he wonders, how am I still happy? How the hell am I still alive?