Breathe Again
Empty of life’s breath,
I take a gulp of air
into my hollow essence
thirsting to fill
my concave valley
with sparkling drops
of silvered water
soothing me in tiny sips
beneath
my floundering surface.
I beg to fill my soul,
overcome by drumming heart,
scraped by sloughing skin,
bloodless ties
torn asunder,
ribbons of my sobs.
I incise my body
of my wounds,
swallow my need
and memories of you.
At last, I take another
gasp of breath
expelling space to fill
my lungs with inhaled
pulse of zephyrs
beginning anew
as wet cheeks are met
with loving hands
grasping me
in their calming heat.
Value
If it's okay to hold my breath,
to show that I want to breathe,
Then maybe I'll walk out to the door
To show how much I don't want to leave.
Then afterwords I'll empty my fridge,
And give all my food away,
To show how much I value it,
How much I need it at the end of the day.
Is it okay to throw away,
Anything with value to me,
To show how much I want it,
As if it's the only way to see.
To see how much I treasure life,
And each breath I take,
Then maybe I'll just go to sleep,
And never again wake.
last breath
when blood spills on steel we may
hold our breath
when bad news hits hard,
maybe the dreaded word of death,
the c word for cancer,
the pycho ward,
the verdict,
our breath involuntary holds,
and so,
light headedness
the fainting spell
despite our will however strong
at times we hold our breath
it teaches us to know when we hold our breath its cool
to feel more alive,
reminds us well that's its okay to want again to breathe
our breath to hold by our will
gives at times our desperate minds
to breathe again is cool
reminds ourselves a breath is precious still
consider those trapped underground
megatons of rock above,
with darkness deep profound
the panic suffocation chokes and gags
the spirit by the throat
a crippled airline flight
your withheld breath,
a freefall dive from miles above
high altitude of grief,
childhood pain,
five brothers on your chest
the panic fight, the muffled cry of fear,
the urgent need to take a breath ensues
hold your breath to challenged match
in underwater diver's plunge
until your lungs feel hot to burst
will make you feel alive
depression's weight on your soul
the pain despair withholds,
your wanting to breathe in
its ugly claws tears your heart and mind
kills you slowly at a time
suffocates your wanting to live on
you hold your breath crying out
in silent agony,
but soon enough you suck in air
for another try
another moment, however brief
of vital respiration
although you feel dead inside
you're somewhat glad you're still alive
your last moments on this earth
might make you love the last breaths that you take
for you hold and contemplate
the slow inhale,
slow exhale
when you by circumstance,
see a living picture come serene,
a mother holding baby to her breast
sunshine reflecting off a young girl's hair
walking on a foot path in early morning air
you might think you must have courage
sometimes just to take another shallow breath
must have strength sometimes just to live another hour
as you slowly suck it all in
you make another deliberate inhalation
it may not be that you're afraid to die,
but more that you'd rather live
Asthma.
You don't know
how it feels when the moisture
evaporates inside me,
When my chest is crushed
and you say I'm faking it
as I hold my hand over my heart,
my ribs can't go wide enough.
I want to breathe.
I thank everyday,
because those times
when the attacks return
and I want to cry
because my sadness
collapses inside me,
I am glad I can breathe.
