I had never been in love before.

I avoided it. A veritable pariah.

I coasted through high school

with my nose in a book

baggy sweaters

and a tomboyish appeal.

I was not interested

in menial relations

and bore a case of near

haphephobia.

Most of my friends

happened to be men

and I was reading King

while girls cooed over-

eugh-

Twilight.

I met him in a class

I had offered at the zoo

which had me on a high anyway,

I mean-

who gets tutored beside a toucan?

We spent the night in a group

all herded into one room

and he wandered up and plopped down

and shared my pillow

while the rest of him stretched

comfortably away from me.

Not quite sure how to deal with it

I just laid there for a while

and eventually fell asleep

heartened when

nothing else happened.

We were friends for a time

dated, broke up.

Distance is rough

on any relationship.

But we remained friends

which apparently is rare

a mutual respect

that wouldn’t let it waver.

And now as chance would have it

here we are again

faced with a possibility

that distance

will no longer be a problem.

So for one last effort

we’ll give it another try

I’m hopeful that it works

maybe even confident

yet if it doesn’t

I find comfort in the knowledge

that despite it all

in the end

I will still

have my friend.

I have never been in love before.

But today was different.

My backpack felt heavy with homework and textbooks, but when I saw him it lightened me up.

He was laughing with his friends--why was his smile so perfect?

His brown hair almost touched his matching brown eyes.

He wore faded jeans and a shaggy T-shirt.

He turned to look at me, and my heart beat fast and I hoped he could not hear it.

His nose crinkles when he smiles, I noted.

"Hello."

My heart stopped beating for a second and then it gave a nervous flutter.

"Oh, um, hi," I mumbled.

His eyes met mine, and he tilted his head.

"I like your shirt."

That comment made my heart flutter again, and I looked down at my shirt.

It was just a plain blue T-shirt. Why did he like it?

"I--yours is nice too," I stammered.

The boy grinned. "I'm Carson."

"Oh," I said. "Nice name. I'm Lily."

"Nice name," Carson echoed. The bell rang, and he once again smiled at me. "See you."

I nodded, and stared into direction he went until my friend nudged me, looking amused. "C'mon. Let's go to my house."

I nodded again robotically. "Okay." But I could not stop thinking about Carson, with his laughing eyes and his smile.

For the first time, I was in love.

I have never been in love before.

But when he looked at me for the first time, I swore I was. I know, pretty cliché right? But nonetheless true.

The first time I saw him, he appeared to be busy. His mind somewhere else.

I walked in and he looked up, because of the sudden noise I realized. He seemed almost confused by this new group of three that walked through the doors. He turned to us, but not to look for too long. I sat down, nervous and slightly uncomfortable (and he didn't really help much) but somehow I felt comforted. His dirty blonde hair was kinda long, but not passed his ears, and his sea foam blue eyes were astounding (though I tried not to stare.) he had acne scars but they didn't matter to me because all I could think is, 'there is no other perfect being on this earth but him.'

Amazingly, we became friends. Over the next year and a half we talked and hung out (never on a date though and always with the company of my sisters.) and before I knew it, he was all I could think about. Day and night. My best dreams were the ones that he featured in and I loved every second of it.

I was talking to my friend over the phone through text message and she said she was talking to him. She was his friend too, you see. I told her to say hi for me and then something I didn't expect happened. He asked for my number. I was blushing like crazy and glad no one could see. Obviously I said yes and we talked that night. Eventually he asked, and I quote, "Do you like like me?" My heart was racing but I couldn't tell him the truth. You see, at that moment I had started falling for him and I knew I more than just "like like(d)" him. I couldn't tell him that for a few reasons though. 1.) he'd think I was crazy 2.) I was afraid of his intentions with the question. What if he didn't ask because he liked me back and was just curious, because I'm sure it was obvious and 3.) my sister liked him too. So after thinking it over I asked him, and again I quote, "why do you want to know?" Surprise surprise, he didn't respond and we continued our lives as if the conversation never happened. But life with him in it was spectacular. I knew there was something special about him from the beginning but I never thought I would end up falling for him. But soon my hopes of being with him were crushed. My sister told me that she was sure he liked her and not me. I wasn't ready to admit that that could be possible so I decided to let things happen naturally and what ended up happing isn't much of a surprise. Because this is a love story after all. He ended up falling for her. Oh, I see, you thought this was a love story about me? Sorry to disappoint, I wished for the same thing too, but there was nothing anyone could do about it.

So I sat and watched them grow closer as my heart tore apart.

My heart ached to be with him more than anything else in this world, but I was happy for them. Whenever she smiles, he's happy.

Whenever he's with her, he's happy.

Though it's true I love him even to this day, but still, I'm glad he got the love story he was after. Even if that meant I'd have to wait for mine.

I have never been in love before . At least not real , true , captivating love. Maybe the kind you think is true , but then when you find the real thing, is when you realize I have never been in love before, until I fell in love with him. I've had very few boyfriends, but when I met this one, I knew it was meant to be. I have never wanted somebody so bad, or tried so hard before. It was just the way he looked up at me , that made me want him so badly. He was looking down at his fumbling hands until I walked by, then he slowly lifted his chin up to meet my gazing eyes . I saw the shine they had to them, so green and so shy. He didn't say a word to me , until a few weeks later. He finally found the guts to introduce himself to me. We talked for hours and hours on end , and getting upset when we had to go. One day he finally kissed me , but not a sloppy first kiss kind of kiss, but one with potential to be more, one glowing with much passion. He hugged me so tight , and wouldn't let go , and of course I didn't mind. When I thought he was about to let go, he actually just hung on tighter. He whispered in my ear to me, " I won't let go unless you make me. Because why would I let go to something so perfect, when it could have the chance to leave. And if you chose to leave right now , you'll always carry a piece of me." It was in that moment there I knew I have never been in love before, until he came into my life, and I know I never want him to leave.

I have never been in love before, but It was just took one Friday to make that change....

It was after school I walked in the commons sat in a table and started to study while and another friend arrived and chatted before we heard "excuse me but is it alright if I sit here?" He had those dark glazing chocolate brown eyes shaggy brown hair, I don't know what happened to start, but eventually I closed my study put it away, my friend left and we talked up a storm. We laughed we walked and to think I am a sophomore and he was is senior at another school, he was there to pick up his sister, but looks like he picked up my heart too. We exchanged numbers that day I had the guts to ask him. On Saturday night he asked me if I liked him over text after basically talking all day I said "yes." he said "good because I like you too." My heart fluttered and I felt this warmth ache, But he did not know I could only date him secretly. When he found out my heart ached for him and unending pain I still have today he said no because like the gentleman he is. He wants to ask my father in order to date me publicly, but I know with my mothers will she will never let that happen. If I could I would, but right now I know she won't let it happen. I won't let her stop how I feel I will find away even if or love is forbidden even if I have to wait or beg maybe just maybe for the first time my mother will allow me for the first time something I want.(based on true story)

—Terra

I had never been in love before. So I didn't really know what to expect, or how I would know that I was in love.

He got really sick in January. It was before we were living together, and I called him in the morning before leaving for work. He didn’t pick up, but I thought he was in the shower. On the subway I tried again, and there was no answer. The second the clock in the bakery hit 11:00 I tore off my apron and ran out the door to the subway, barely managing to catch one before the doors closed. He still had not answered his phone. When I arrived at the apartment, it smelled like stuffiness and sick and I found him crouched on the bathroom floor.

I gave him a cool washcloth and a glass of water, took his temperature and tucked him into bed with the trash bin by the nightstand, promising to come back in a few hours.

When I got back and his temperature was above 104, his skin pale and clammy, I helped him out of bed, and very slowly we made our way out the door and down the 5 flights of stairs to the garage. We drove to the emergency room and I held his head in my lap under the bright white lights as he groaned and mumbled nonsense in Spanish and English and Portuguese about unicorns and French toast.

It made me sick to watch him disappear with the doctors through the double doors, leaving me sitting in the uncomfortable plastic chair all alone. I remember being so worried about him I couldn’t even think straight. I think that's how I knew.

When a friendly old doctor came over to me to tell me I could see him, I actually hugged him before dashing inside.

The first time we said I love you was there, in the hospital, me crouched by his bedside, our hands intertwined.