i. tomorrow is never promised

so don't leave anything unsaid

ii. tell your friends i love you

every day

because who knows if you're the only one in their lives

that is willing to say that

iii. and goddammit everyone deserves to love

and be loved

at least once in their lifetime

#justrandomthoughtsforgivemeitsbad #poetry

I'm sorry,

I really am very sorry.

believe me

please

Like the pied piper and the rat

though now that I see

Am I the piper, or are you?

Am I the rat, or are you?

probably me

I'm sorry

For the mask that I wore

that I made you see

for the strings I so lovingly tied to you

as I told you to dance

and so you danced

danced for me

So that I might be entertained

I, who gathered the fragments of your shattered heart

and pieced it together

and framed it,

signed it:

"With Love."

so yes,

I'm sorry

he loves me

he loves me not

he loves me

he loves me...not

I.

run

run further.

anywhere just to escape this dreaded room.

filled with flowers so ready to bloom.

II.

climb

climb further.

you're almost at the top of the cliff.

no one will find you if you are swift.

III.

lean

lean further.

stare into the deep ocean abyss.

simply longing for his dead, cold kiss.

IV.

stare

stare further.

doesn't the moons dancing light look pleasant?

as it sings to you in the shape of a crescent.

V.

cry

cry further.

the tears will fall in the ocean too.

as sirens cold grasps keep them safe for you.

VI.

think

think further.

a midnight swim doesn't sound too bad.

surely they know it's only because you're sad.

VII.

late

too late.

crashing down you go.

the railing won't keep you from what's below.

VIII.

fall

fall further.

now you know how it feels to fly.

silently through the deep night sky.

IX.

crash

crash further.

the cold water pierces you, as you fall from rather high.

i'm sorry to say, but it's too late for good bye.

X.

die

die further.

it's simpler this way.

i'm sure he'll just forget you someday.

... i love you

he will say,

petal in hand

maybe he will mourn on your funeral day?

it's funny how time repeats itself

she thought,

as she stood in the barren field

rose in hand,

as the shine in her eyes dripped away as tears.

slowly, the wind began to push harder

as she lifted her head,

holding back a storm.

longer she stood,

the petals of the rose, slowly wilting, drifted further away

as time moved around her.

it got harder to hold her head up

it's ok to let a few tears fall

the wind pushed further,

and further,

it was no longer simply wind pushing her away

as the rain began to pour,

her hair soaked,

covering her face.

the rain went for an eternity.

let the hail start

she said,

as it began to hit her harder each time

leaving scratches and bruises

but there was nothing to end it.

this time, she could no longer stand.

she fell to the ground in agony.

none of this is real

she thought.

when will she realise,

she's just terrified of the wind blowing her away again.

1. forget about all the yourselfs you've lost in empty hotel rooms that nobody paid for,

forget they even existed.

you are the only yourself that the world will ever need.

2. if you wake up in the middle of a sleepless night

sitting cross-legged

on the edge of your bed,

gun pressed to your head,

fingers clenching like the blinking stars of our hands

when we were five and sang twinkle twinkle little star,

know that i love you

and please remind yourself

which side of the gun

you should be on.

3. your arms around me

are enough.

they always will be.

4. if you can feel a panic attack

coming,

please don't lock yourself in your room

and turn the music up

just a little bit

and check, frantically,

that the curtains are closed

and press your eyelids shut

as if they were hands pressed together in prayer.

breathe slowly and ground yourself:

find five different things you can see,

four things you can feel,

three things you can hear,

two things you can smell

and one thing you can taste.

take a deep breath with each thing you find.

5. i know it's never nice to lose yourself,

but sometimes it happens

so you can become stronger.

6. your favourite flower

is the yellow chrysanthemum.

7. you matter.

8. in the end,

you are your own hero.

you don't need wings

or a cape

or a wish

to fly.

9. don't be scared.

10. i love you, i will always love you, i have always loved you. now and forever.

11. i'm sorry.

#poetry #fiction

did you call her your sunflower

and in the creases of her skin

spell out love

like a liability,

the hum of two bodies pressed together

not knowing the name of the other,

with a taste like the word please

and thank you?

did you make her a bath

and drown her,

all of her,

slick skin

and bruised hips

and wet hair

and broken heart

and pendulum eyes

her?

did you soak your soal

in vodka

and wash out the taste of her,

the colour she dyed your hands

and mind

and the woodwork of your bedroom,

the promises

that made you warm

on such a cold, stormy night?

when you set the room on fire,

tell me,

was it you

or your love

that burnt down first?

#poetry