My earliest memory is when I fell down the steps at my house. I don't remember much but I remember running downstairs with two of my sisters and my mom. I do not remember why we went down but we were standing on the wooden steps heading into my basement. I was standing behind my sister Maddy and I remember yelling at her to move. She refused to move down the steps any farther. I was looking down at my socks which i remember were white with a yellow ring around the toe. I then fell down and off the side of the steps. I slammed my head onto the concrete floor and my mother said she remembers seeing my skull under all the blood gushing out of my head. I do not remember much of what happened after that but my family raced me to the hospital. I remember opening up my eyes and seeing white. I believe they put something over my face to cover up my new wound. I remember hearing loud noises and voices. I got stitches and now have a scar on my head from my earliest memory.

It only happens when you’re not here

When i'm alone

When its only my thoughts

When you’re not here to distract me

It only happens when you’re not here

I can’t smile when you’re not here

I can't eat when you’re not here

I can’t think straight when you’re not here

It only happens when you’re not here

I'm not happy when you’re not here

It only happens when you’re not here

Depression is the worst feeling you could feel and you cannot stop it. People say you must get over it and grow from it but you can only go numb to it. It will never leave you, you will always be stuck with that feeling in your stomach or that thought in the back of your head. Depression makes you hate who you are, it makes you feel unnormal. At times you might feel like you are literally going insane and each outburst gets worse. But slowly you grow farther and farther from who you once were. The pain grows more and you no longer feel human. You feel like you are your own being and will never fit in with anyone else. All you want is to feel normal but it will never happen. You will only continue to hate yourself more. The people who once loved you will start to hate you and grow farther apart from you because of how much you will change.

Many people turn to drugs or alcohol to try to numb this horrible feeling; this only makes it worse for yourself. You turn into a addict on your first try. That first “high” and your hooked. This is the best you have ever felt in your life. You want to feel this way all the time. So you continue to use and you start to rely on it to feel happy or to feel normal. You are slowly killing yourself; the drugs or alcohol are only making it worse for you. When you finally realize this you are already hooked and you hate yourself even more for letting it get this far. So you just resorte back to it. The cycle will never end. You are never going to be happy again.

“They’ll know it was us!” yelled Mark. “No way! We’ll make sure of it. Nobody will have a clue,” replied Aaron. “Do you have the stuff?” asked Jacob . “I brought all my mom had; we will have enough.” said Aaron. “Wes will know it was us! He’ll kill us if he sees us.” yelled Mark. “If he does catch us, we will be legends for this night!” Aaron cheered.

It was halloween night, and Aaron and his friends devised a plan to trash their school bully’s house. They all grabbed their bikes and headed down the street with egg cartons and toilet paper stuffed in their backpacks and masks on their faces. “There’s too many people out trick or treating right now!” squawked Mark. “We can wait until nobody's around, but right now is the best time for it; they’ll never know it was us.”

They all waited around the block until the coast was clear. They pedaled up to his house and unleashed everything they had. Aaron started with an egg; he felt powerful. Then Jacob and Mark started throwing toilet paper in the trees and over the house. They all laughed together. Then, a woman in her fifties came out screaming and yelling. Aaron pelted her with an egg and the other two boys followed. She slammed the door screaming. The three boys jumped on their bikes and raced home. They knew the lady had to have called the cops; this just made them feel strong. The boys made it to Aaron’s house and put on different costumes and went out trick or treating.

“Did you see the look on her face when I hit her with the egg?” Aaron laughed. “That was priceless! Good thing we got out of there so fast.” replied Jacob.“Y-y-yeah, do you think she knew it was us? Do you think she called the cops?” asked Mark. “No way she knew it was us, the old bag wears huge thick glasses she couldn't see a thing without them. But she might’ve called the cops, who cares anyways?” answered Aaron.

Aaron and his friends continued to trick or treat with pride on their chest. They all felt great for finally standing up to Wes. But soon this would all change. Almost two hours later they seen Wes and his mother cleaning up the mess they created. Thinking they were out of the clear they walked by like nothing was wrong but Wes knew it was them.

“Hey, buttmunchers! I know it was you three, I’ll kill you!” Screamed Wes. The second they heard Wes’ voice the kids started running up the street in freight of what was about to happen. They darted for the woods to get away from Wes. Mark and Aaron ran straight into the woods but Jacob ducked behind houses and kept running until he was safe. Mark and Aaron ran until they couldn’t breathe. They were in the middle of the woods in the pitch black dark abyss. There was no sight of Wes, or anyone around.

The two boys hid for awhile until they felt safe. “I think we lost him, there’s no way he’d come this far into the woods” said Aaron. “W-why did you make us egg his house? He’s going to kill us now.” Cried Mark. “Why are you being such a girl. You had the egg in your hand and you chose to do that so don't blame me!” Aaron said angrily. They started going deeper and deeper into the woods not knowing where they were going.

“Oh no, we are going to get in trouble, I'm going to get in trouble.” Mark said repeatedly in a frightened tone. “Can you shut-up with that. We are not going to get in trouble. If you say it one more time I'm leaving you out here by yourself.” Aaron said Irritatingly. The boys kept moving still not sure of where the were going.

The wind was blowing through the trees and every little sound scared the boys. “I can’t just keep walking! Wes probably stopped looking for us anyways” said Aaron. “Well, how do we get home?” asked Mark. The boys looked around with no clue of where they were and how to get home. The bushes rustled again; and Wes jumped out with a pocket knife in hand. “You won't need to know how to get home when you’re dead” laughed Wes. The boys backed up into a tree with fright in their eyes. This was the end for both of them.