We were up early and driving to thrift shops around the city, then into downtown, where we parked and had coffee. The actual city of Los Angeles was rarely depicted in film, but it was a city, skyscrapers and pedestrian traffic with vendors and beggars, with lawyers and pick-pockets and steel edges. We walked the steps of Angels Flight, and my heart was blown to bits by the music in Arturo Bandini, the life of Fante’s words. All of Los Angeles in the afternoon, the working hours, when the city was less molested and timeless, a black and white lens.

getting to know you,

getting to know all about you!

getting to like you,

getting to hope you like me!

getting to know you,

putting it my way but nicely!

you are precisely...

my cup of tea!

The piano is not firewood yet

They try to remember

But still they forget

That the heart beats in three

Just like a waltz

And nothing can stop you from dancing

Rise from your cold hospital bed

I tell you

You're

Not

Dying

Everyone knows

You're going to live

So you might as well start trying

Love what you have

And you'll have more love

You're

Not

Dying

Everyone knows

You're going to love

Though there's still

No cure

For crying

They paved paradise and put up a parking lot

With a pink hotel, a boutique, and a swingin' hot spot

Don't it always seem to go

That you don't know what you got 'til it's gone

They paved paradise and put up a parking lot

-Counting Crows version

Muscle to muscle and toe to toe

The fear has gripped me but here I go

My heart sinks as I jump up

Your hand grips hand as my eyes shut

My mind is like a crazy maze. usually there's 6 different songs, 5 different feelings and thoughts, 4 math problems, 3 books, 2 names, 1 little me lost in my mind of thoughts trying to figure out what's going on in it.

But then my mind goes blank and all thats left is the songs.

Oh no there's another song stuck in my head!

Queens of the Stone Age is a band that I've been addicted to ever since I heard,"No One Knows" back in 2002 when it was released. I saw QOTSA on some late night talk show, and watching the bass solo just blew my mind. The title song is a mix of a relaxing/reminder for me, since it's an upbeat but mellow song, and it helps with my social anxiety. If they already know I'm insane, I can be me without being too constrained. I never stray too far from listening to QOTSA, Eagles of Death Metal, KYUSS, The Desert Sessions Album, or Them Crooked Vultures on my playlists since Desert/Robot/Rockabilly is probably my favorite stuff to listen to when I want to relax.