Prowling the alleys of rhymes,

Captain Hook spins a bloody yarn,

fantasy unfurled like Jolly Roger flag

when open sea and sky met

old salt’s mischievous half smile.

He was not a buffoon when it came

to booty of shiny doubloons.

Pirate seadog told his tale

of a ghostly harbor

of lost phantom ships-

The bilge be suckin’

and me mateys

be dancin’

with Jack Ketch,

at the end

of their ropes.

A tale of too

much grog,

three sheets to the wind,

and blaggards pillagin’.

Me mates be stealin’

a buccaneers’ wench,

be throwin’ her to the hold,

crackin’ Jenny’s teacup

in battened down hatches,

be raisin’ kill devil

to the blustery sky.

Me tars be ravagin’ fair wench

when blimey, me saw

clipper ship be pursuin’

yonder to east.

Shiver Me Timbers!

Heave to, I be yellin’

Weigh anchor

and hoist the mizzen!

Soon me ship

be death vessel,

gathering souls

of me hearties

to walk yon plank.

Avast, me phantom

ship now be restin’

in Davy Jones’ Locker.

Dead men be telling

no tales

but be shark bait

ten fathoms under.

I shall reinvent voice,

because me hears

the sound scurry beneath

me skin as I sleep,

and the hull of my heart

holds regrets that look like rats,

I would swallow the anchor,

lower sails for good,

but her eyes be

a black spot,

set to blow me down

into the depths,

where I will feed fishes

in her honor

until me flesh is no longer

written on the maps of sharks,

and the plank holding

the imprint of me heel,

will form an arrow that points

to the well of pirate tears.

and she has made an ocean.

but dead men tell no tales,

and the treasure of her

lies marooned on a shore

beyond the reach of sails.

I wait for the storm,

so claps of thunder

can make me forget.

“I’ll pay ye back, and more besides!”

    The old man shouted loud,

“When Red-eyed Jack o’ the “Dagger” returns

    “I’ll hold me head up proud!”

“A drink for all, the best o’ beef

    and all me debts I’ll settle.

I’ll have a portion full - but more...

    his word to vouch me mettle!”

“Away with ye’!  Scurvy wretch!”

    The watchman shook his head

“A leg, one arm and barely an eye,

    a month and you’ll be dead.”

“A drunken, wasted, tavern rat

    ’tis all of ye I see,

A beggar now, a beggar then

    ’tis all ye’ll ever be!”

“Mock, me not!” The grey-beard cried

    “The tale I tells is true,

Of bigger days, and bolder ways

    and better men than you!”

“Twenty years I sailed with him

    ’til worthless men arose.

A mutiny - a murder

    for a moonless night they chose!

Now, Jack be sleepin’ soundly

    as the cowards find their mark

But I been smellin’ trouble

    so I’m waitin’ in the dark

I slit the first from ear to ear ...

    the second shouts “Curse you!”...

He shoots me in the leg,

    while with me’ blade I run ’im through!

The third he cries and runs away.

    The life-boat now wants he…

But ’fore he draws a free man’s breath

    He’ll have to go through me

So knife in hand it’s overboard

    ’midst cut and blood and bone

’til bleeding, cold, victorious

    ashore I wash, alone.

And now in every port I sing

    The song o’ the Dagger’s night

with hopes that Red Eyed Jack prevailed

    to hear his ship-mate’s plight”

The Watchman turned his head a sneer

    “We’re done with all yer lies!

If Jack appear to good folk here

    I’ll bow before their eyes”

“The Dagger be sent to Davy Jones

    That and all her crew.

If treasure there be there’s none fer ye’

    old dog, ye know it true!”

Now a pirate sees most every shade

    And that he learns to bear

But this, at last, be a tellin’ made

    to shed a red-eyed tear

Three paces full I strode at haste

    to where the old man sat.

Three bags of gold I proudly placed

    upon his boney lap.

A hush to shake the rafter falls

    upon the crowded inn

And to the door the watchman calls

    a runnin’ from his sin.

“Not so fast!” I bellow loud

    “Yer day is not hear done.

Ye’ve said yer piece and now it’s time

    fer Jack to have some fun!”

“So bow before these fine good folk

    Aye, bow to kneel and pray

And kiss the hand of the one I owe

    a debt too high to pay!”

    So next ye’ hear an old salt sing

        A song of better days

    Be sure to mind yer manners, fer

        his Captain comes to pay!

Ahoy Mateys

The Unicorn sails

Fer' once again in the pirate's name.

Red feathered hat floats with the blighter

Batten down your hatches

The original Buccaneer is here

Blimey, I thought he was dead

But avast stands here Rackham the Red

The jolly roger flutters with all its might

The bearded pirate spreads a fright

He knows where lies his treasure chest

And back he is in his chivalry best

For he is the very pirate who stormed unknown seas

And his spirit his back to loot his lost guineas.

image from @The Adventures of Tintin

Share with me yer shanty's,

Yer tales and yer fancies.

The black sea's me 'ome,

An' me hearts with a lassie,

Avast ye! Now listen,

Not a girl with a glisten,

A maiden of wood.

A ship not a she.

I've been called an old salt,

But I've no mind for labels,

I'm a man-o-war,

With an eye too heave ho,

Though I'll walk the plank,

Before I ever grow old.

The sea is me life,

The salts greater than gold!

'Cast the line and open 'er sail!'

The swag Pirate Cap'n Bogart did hail

We'd made wit' the looty

Aye, what a booty!

T'was to open seas fer us w'out fail

'Argh! We be chased! All men make haste!'

Bogart grabbed 'de wheel and about faced

We slipped and slid cross deck and bow

Doing our best to stay upright but how

'Oi grabbed at some rope, tried to keep hope

The life 'o a pirate is truly no joke

Being a lady, 'oi be pretty shady

Snuck in claiming me name was O'Brady

Now 'oi could only pray 'oid live thru the day

That none 'o the blokes looked too close me way

'Oid gave up me skirt for a life 'o hard work

Neath me nails 'oi 'ad a gallon 'o dirt

'Blimey, O'Brady, yar ain't no lady!

Get up that sail 'for 'oi make yar me gravy!'

Bogart 'ollered at me from above

Me pirate cap'n, 'e is me true love

Aye, Cap'n, me 'ollars, voice really gruff

Flung back 'dem ropes, pulled wit' a huff

No way 'oid let 'dem boys gives me a sneer

Meet th' ropes end or 'oil be buccaneer

Me love, Cap'n Bogart thinks me a man

E's no oi'dea 'o me secret plan

'Oil be mixin' me potion 'o love fer 'is rum

'Den once 'e drinks it, 'oil show 'im me bum!

(For partial glossary of pirate-a-nese, see Lish's poem, the author of this challenge.... 'Oil be taggin' 'er in comments and it be on 'er profile!)