Well now really when we go back then to falling in love. And say it’s crazy falling. You see we don’t say rising into love. There is in it the idea of the fall. And it is goes back as a matter of fact two extremely fundamental things that there is always a curious tie at some point between the fall and the creation. Taking this ghastly risk, is the condition of there being life. You see, for all life is an act of faith and an act of gamble. The moment you take a step, you do so on an act of faith, because you don’t really know that the floors not going to give in to your feet. The moment you take a journey what an act of faith. The moment you enter into any kind of human undertaking in relationship what an act of faith you see you’ve given yourself up. But this is the most powerful thing that can be done surrender see and love is an act of surrender to another person. Total abandonment. I give myself to you. Take me, do anything you like with me. So, that’s quite mad because you see it’s letting things get out of control all sensible people keep things in control. Watch it, watch it, watch it. Security. Vigilance. Watch it police, watch it Gods, watch it , who’s going to watch the Gods? So actually there for all the cost and wisdom what is really sensible is to let go that is to commit oneself to give oneself up and that’s quite mad, so we come to the strange conclusion that in madness lies sanity.

Your words,

I love them.

I hate them.

every laugh.

every taunt.

stupid,

I know.

you hurt me.

burn me.

break me.

shred me.

into a million pieces.

but I still like you.

so damn much.

every time I hear your lips moving,

curling into a sneer,

or into that damn charming smile,

I freeze up.

don’t ask me why.

_____________________________________________________________________

it’s like a goddamn chain

immediately locks around my wrists

and I freeze,

trapped,

rooted to the ground,

nowhere to run,

locked up in the prison

created by your

stupid words,

and vain taunts.

But I still like you,

I still try to pull you in,

closer,

although all logic screams at me not to.

Damn you,

it’s not fair to be locked up,

by the person,

you hate and goddamn love at the same time.

Why can’t I get over you?

Why do I allow myself,

my heart,

my mind,

my innocent soul,

to be locked up,

in chains,

in a damn

P R I S O N

P R I S O N

P R I S O N

P R I S O N

P R I S O N

P R I S O N

P R I S O N

willingly?

plain and simple,

I am a loser,

an idiot,

completely

in love with you.

nothingness.

The you I know, or past tense knew,

was not the kind that was not motivated

or the kind that would give up so darn easily.

The you I knew was a goddy rebel,

who would fight,

and keep fighting.

But also

a soft and nice person.

Now,

I don't know you anymore,

and I'm being honest, cousin.

Well,

you are still stubborn.

Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

I have no idea.

Last time,

it was.

Now,

I don't know.

You won't even let me help you.

You won't let me in.

Now you tell me,

who are you?

'Cause,

I'll be lying if I said I don't wanna know.

I left him for somebody else

I don’t regret

Our relation was just pain

but is no more

I try to forget

But here he is, again

Standing at my door

Why don’t you leave me alone?

Why don’t you go where you belong?

I have already tried you enough

I don’t wanna be your drug

I can see the pain

in your eyes

maybe it’s yours

maybe it’s mine

And he say

'Listen,

It’s not your pain, its mine

And I know MY pain pains you more

But you are my only drug

And I am your only cure

You can break me

use me

tamper me

reuse me

I won’t complain

Cause I belong with you

I belong with this pain’

Laden with jewels,

He crosses the sands,

Devoid of anxiety,

But instead filled to the brim with anticipation,

The man searches for the oasis,

For the crystalline azure

That was once promised to him,

Long ago.

- Lady Bell