.i.a.m.o.n.l.y.n.o.i.s.e.

a meaningless bother inside my head

i.a.m.b.a.n.g.b.a.n.g.

the lemon of marmelaide

.i.a.m.t.h.e.s.t.r.i.n.g.p.u.l.l.e.d.

you seek me to turn out the lights on your reality

i.a.m.s.w.i.s.s.c.h.e.e.s.e.

but in a sinful, unholy way

.i.a.m.a.n.o.f.f.b.e.a.t.

the dairy queen negro maid

i.a.m.s.o.u.l.o.f.s.w.e.e.t.

purity means i go to fuck-in church every sunday

.i.a.m.m.i.x.e.d.c.o.n.t.e.n.t.

rated xxx at times of sex appeal and chocolate

i.a.m.i.n.d.e.n.t.s.

a paragraph of bitterness

.i.a.m.t.h.e.e.x.t.e.n.d.e.d.l.i.p.

pulled over the chin to hide the phat

i.a.m.w.i.t.h.o.u.t.w.i.n.g.s.

no escape to comfort me, i just bleed and bleed thru me

.i.a.m.p.r.i.n.t.l.e.s.s.

no crime can stick to my name

i.a.m.n.o.i.d.e.n.t.i.t.y.

not much of anything, but gone away

.i.a.m.n.o.t.h.i.n.g.

i create and create, but remain the same

i.a.m.v.o.i.d.

identical to the pupil, vacancy

.i.a.m.a.w.a.k.e.

sleep tight.

I will not be the direct image of you.

I am not someone who is dismissive.

I am unapologetic and defiant.

I will never be submissive,

I will not allow it become subsequent in my brain.

I will never be compliant,

I am not someone who you can tell who to be,

I am not someone who you can tell what to say.

I will stay the stedfast solider,

That you will never break.

The decades of heartache within your genes,

You don't get to release it all on me.

I wasn't equipped to handle your fall,

nor was I ever allowed to just simply be.

Oh, the pitiful cries inside your voice,

when you came to realize you won't be a part of my choice.

Inside of me I've always had a choice,

to never make a sound,

or to make myself proud.

So I sing my anthem,

so loud.

Just not proud,

because I know that deep inside,

I am someone who likes to hide.

Elbows off the table

sit up straight

Good girls speak softly

Close your mouth

fork down between bites

Good girls don’t ask questions

Eat it all

nothing goes to waste

Good girls do as they are told

Silence

is golden

Good girl

Answer me with tears

when I scream at you

Good girl

You don’t need a door

body exploration is sin

Good girl

Finish your chores

or get the belt

Good girl

Be home when I say

grounded a week for each minute late

Bad Girl

You don’t need books

knowledge is dangerous

Bad Girl

You don’t need friends

they’ll poison your mind

Bad Girl

Suffocate

Stagnate

Rot in place

Starved of truth, light, air,

love

You.

Will.

Thrive.

Another living dead girl

molded to our specifications.

Take my life so I can be

Out from under, truly free.

Let me end it now, I pray.

I would do it ev’ry day.

I would do it ev’ry day.

Take my life, I cannot wait,

All my trials to consecrate.

All my ailments, take them, too.

I’ll devote them all to you.

I’ll devote them all to you.

Suspended

there are no memories

only moments of time

suspended in life

~ ki ~

https://lonecypressworkshop.com/the-conversation/

https://lonecypressworkshop.com/

I’ll admit

I probably don’t know you

as well as I think

I do

but I want to

and you run away

I’m still here

you see

waiting at the other side

of the wall

won’t you

talk to me?

Strangers -{renata ferretti}