Subterfuge in touching you

Alleviate was my purpose.

Somewhere along those missguided shores

I left you gasping for breath

As my blood surged. 

Striking. Spectacular. Imposing. 

I leapt, dashed, strangled

Without ever meaning to.

All I yearned for

Was the chance to heal you.

Mistaken. Unsound. Imprecise. 

My faults leaked from my well-intentioned fingertips.

To handle your inescapable pain

Let it escape. Let it be mine. 

And as your hushed heartbeat thumped to the rhythm of my selfish ways

I let you slip away.

Unease. Sorrow. Compunction. 

I'll regrettably live to heal another day.

Closing my eyes to sleep

Trying to connect every little thing I see

Even in the dark, images come to life

Playing the role of a god

Just for a minute to decide

Which story I want to play

To accompany me throughout the night

Sunrise and sunset, I seldom see

Mother, father, a family

Letters, cards, poems not written

Hoping to have courage the next day

30 seconds remaining

Tossing and turning

I want to see your face, his face, our faces

Because I know I can't remember my dreams

So, it's okay to take a random piece of memory

That's what I tell myself every evening

Waiting, creating, connecting

Our breaths like raging storms

Filled with energy as we fall under

As passionate as the swirling wind

As loud as the rolling thunder

Every touch lightning

Sparking that lust within

words go down on paper

Ideas rush through minds

Love steals hearts

And men and women continue on

A blue bird flies by

Chasing a cardinal

The songs they sing

intertwine to make beauty

The artists mind wanders 

His body ages

His love of life fades

but he still puts pen to paper

I wonder 

but have yet to wander

I aspire 

but have yet to inspire

Doubts cripple strong men

But determination carries us through

The cardinal sings a song of love

The blue bird sings one of sadness

And I sit 

pen in hand

paper on desk

and words in my heart 

I always have beautiful music playing.

I replay the events of the day backwards to go over anything I may have missed. "Did I remember to tell them I love them?" "Does she know how much she means to me?, did I take the time to make sure they know that I am grateful for everything they do for me?" Then I get to my dreams of the night before, last night was a wonderful one! Pure love from heaven from my elders, oh Twas a loving sort!

Anyway, usually I try to plan the coming day, at least have an idea of what the next day will look like.

There's usually a Doberman as close to me as he can get, as the sound of the

Music lulls me to sleep.

My music choices: Listen to Moon-Silvered Clouds by Deuter on @AppleMusic.

https://itun.es/us/cwn4e?i=81843556

Listen to Life and Death by Paul Cardall on @AppleMusic.

https://itun.es/us/onciX?i=824189778

Check out the music. Sweet dreams baby.

Soothing seas beckon her sorrow

Walk into cool water until it encircles

Pampers your soul, anchors your angst

Tears mix with water soothing despair.

     Ocean b-r-e-a-t-h-e-s for her.

the shadow on his face like

a comfortable parasite,

gulping to grey fatness.

his skin, pale as the surface

wilts lonely, desperate for

the fondle of dawn.

the future hangs overhead

and feeds the creature.

he knows, her breath is moist

with sweetness, able to

slaughter the shade, able to

beckon the warmth again.

her majesty brightens the

phantoms he projects and

he tastes the moment with her,

gentle licks of salvation.