I am tired

Of constantly being underestimated

Of being looked at as unworthy

Of being told I am ugly

Of being told I am stupid

Of being seen as a waste of space

One day, I should stand up to myself...

Silence is something that you feel,

when a hungry beggar is sitting in front of you,

but you have too little money with you

and you choose to have your meal.

You weren't too right though,just think, were you?

Silence is something that you hear,

when you know you have to put up a smile

just to show that you are not fragile,

but everywhere within you it's just - fear.

You then are not too strong either, just think, are you?

Silence is something that you realize,

when you want to fight for the bigger one,

but have nobody to relish the smaller one,

so you decide to have the pizza pieces alone - you were wise.

You do feel it, think again, don't you?

"Can I hold her?" The new father asked. He was so hesitant around the newborn. But this was his daughter. She was so small he was afraid he would break her. But he deaspretly wanted to hold her. A nurse gently deposited the child in his arms. His daughter curled up in his arms, asleep. He smiled, tears in his eyes.

3 years later his little girl was running around the house. The man had just gotten off of work. She jumped up into his arms, and the man laughed, pulling her close.

"Daddy, you can let go of me." The man smiled. "I'm going to hug you, and love you, and squeeze you, and call you Goerge. Hi Goerge" The girl laughed.

Jumping off the bus, into her father's arms the 5-year old smiled. Together they said. "I'm going to hug you, and love you, and squeeze you, and call you Goerge. HI GOERGE!"

The nurse shook her head sadly. The father looked helplessly at the young teen that was his daughter. The body, once so full of life, now lay dead on the cot. He looked at the nurse.

"Can I hold her?"

I want to sit by the lakeside and stare into the future. Who knows what's there. I'm not sure I'm ready to visit the future just yet. It'll be here soon enough.

I don't want to go into the past either. There are too many scary things I've seen, too many thoughts I'd rather let die in history.

So maybe I'll just explore the present. The lake's edge. The dark trees. The fading stars. Because soon enough, this will be the past. And I'll be in the future.

tonight i drove in the rain. Phoebe Bridgers was playing and the lights i've grown to know as my town were distorted and had an ethereal glow. my sister was sitting next to me. i've been told it's the little things. i never believed it until tonight. it might be the feeling of his head on my chest or my guitar that i decorated. it's my black eyeshadow and the way my angst eats me alive. my crystals might be fake, but i trust them like my grandma trusts a cross with a sheet across it. his lips were on mine and i felt nothing. i looked at myself in the mirror and felt everything. it's the little things. it's my friends laughing with me. it's pen on paper. i have to believe it's the little things. the little things bleed magic, however small. the little magic isn't witchcraft, it's human. the little magic makes me believe. maybe magic isn't real. i still hear you either way. you and i are the storm, darling.

Imagine screwing up,

Again and again.

Can't do anything right,

Might as well stop trying.

To see everyone mad and disappointed,

Has me crying.

Wishing I could leave,

Be by myself,

Where I belong.

Nowhere to be seen.

So I can't screw up,

Make everyone mad at me.

Sorry that I'm broken,

Sorry I'm not what you wanted me to be,

But I warned you when I met you how I am.

You didn't listen and now here we are.

A standstill.

A cold war.

I'm sorry for being me.

A flicker in the air catches my eye. Is that what I think it is? Nah, it can't be. Magic isn't real. That's something for fantasy stories, ones in far off lands that no one but the author has known about before.

But there is it again. Another flicker of light bouncing from one space to another. I want to catch it. To see where it will take me. Maybe it'll take me to that far off place. Maybe it'll give me new powers I never saw coming. Maybe I'll be able to fly.

I would love to fly. To whisk around through the air, looking at things from a bird's view for once. I would never have to walk again. Instead, I could just jump off the ground and soar through the trees.

But magic isn't like that. I see the flicker once more, and then I understand where it's coming from. One little look, and I see a girl sitting beside her grandpa, listening to his story for the first time. She laughs as he acts out an angry ogre stomping around the room. I see a guy nervous to ask out his crush, wondering if she really would turn him down like his friends said she would. But he does, and she says yes. I see a hardworking woman who wants nothing more than to help her famil get the promotion she was going for, finally able to stop worrying about putting food on the table for her children.

That's the magic. It's not getting powers or going to a land far away. It's being here. In the moment. Ready for the future.

Look up to the sky

Now down to the ground

Maybe turn around once or twice

See the world?

It's ours

Let's not destroy it just yet