Walking Out Your Door
You can’t possibly know
that I’ve figured you out.
I won’t fall for cunning ruses
won’t wash feet of filth
won’t take dreadful abuse
your angry words
your demeaning lies
your cheating ways.
In fact, you’ll be
a distant memory
that won’t be repeated.
You’ll see my back
Walking out your door
in lilting bounce steps.
I know this now
but you do not!
Transcendence.
You know not what I know now,
Why I won't bow.
You don't know what it took to grow,
Why I won't let the hate flow.
You couldn't comprehend,
Can't even pretend or transcend.
You wouldn't try,
Not with insanity so nigh.
It's sad, really,
And pretty silly.
Anywho,
In relation to you,
I won't sink to your level,
I won't mirror the devil.
Because I know what you know not,
And what you know is naught,
Due to you being overwrought.
You always told me
I was a tulip
When I thought of myself
As a dandelion
You promised
To tend me
To water me
To help me grow and flourish
But one day
You fed me weed killer
And told me
It was nectar
And I believed you
I believed you when
My leaves shriveled up and
My color was drained
I believed you
Because you were a daffodil
And weeds are nothing
Next to flowers
But one day
I told myself
That I was
An orchid
And that was what
I became
And your weed killer
No longer
Had its hold on me
I grew taller
And stronger
Than even you
And I crowded you out of the garden
And now I take
My own sun
Leaving you to scavenge
For the remaining
Crybaby Queen
The girl is red-cheeked,
her lashes wet.
And everyone can tell,
Her emotions got the best of her head.
She thinks it'll go away,
Like pimples or the oily sheen.
In a few more years,
She'll stop being their crybaby queen.
Oh, sweetheart,
you know not what I know,
this is one trait of yours,
that'll never go.
You'll be better at hiding,
Memorize tile in the bathroom,
but you have to use water,
to make a flower bloom.
Caring too much isn't your fault,
it's what you do with that feeling,
and you, my dear,
will leave the world reeling.
You know not what I now know
I used to think like you. I used to look for meaning. I used to want things to matter. I used to think that there had to be some greater purpose to my life, to my presence.
But there isn't. Nothing we silly little humans do means anything. None of it matters. Ultimately, nobody cares.
We're all beautifully worthless, you know. Everything that we worry and care too much about, every meticulously planned action and line, all were completely, blissfully unimportant in the end.
In the end, we all die. We are forgotten, if not soon, than eventually.
That idea used to terrify me, it used to make me wonder why I bother doing anything, why I bother placing value in anything.
But eventually I realized the truth: it's liberating. It's liberating not to matter, not to mean anything. Nothing has any inherent meaning, so it's your job to assign meaning. or not to. You can - and should, I think - do what makes you happy, because that's the only thing you truly control. You should work for yourself, for your interests, because when humans have gone extinct, nobody will remember you anyway.
If you know what I now know, you'd be selfish.
You Will Know
You know not what I now know
Your time is coming, boy, you will learn
Your stubborn ears don't hear a thing
Every scar a badge of honor earned
Do you know what made you run away?
Have you given it a moment of thought?
No - you've regressed
into a drunken mess
Numb your brain, numb the pain,
Whiskey shots
What I know is who you are deep inside
Your cowardice is your biggest flaw
Too scared to accept the life we planned
And too scared to cut ties - you withdraw
You know not what I now know
I know that most relationships won't last
They're stamped with an expiration date
I think our "use by"date may have passed
Do you know your actions are cutting me?
Do you care that Im over here bleeding?
Do you think I'll wait for you forever?
Do you like me best, crying & pleading?
You know not what I now know
It's unnatural the way you turn so cold
To turn off emotions like you turn off a lamp
How are your emotions so controlled?
You know not what I now know
I learned the hard way, I earned my scars
Yet I was dumb enough to fall for you
So dumb to think the dream could be ours
I know a truth, you'll find out as well
I think soon your eyes will be open
There's not enough liquor in the world
To fix a lonely heart that has been broken
I know what you are going to know
But you're going to learn the hard way
You are not entitled to a goddamn thing
And every dog does NOT have his day
You know not what I now know
Happiness is not guaranteed
It's a limited offer, may not come again
Grab on tight, don't let it recede
I don't think you and I stand a chance
Not while you're a walking shit show
We are squandering the love we should embrace
Soon enough, you'll know what I know
I have learned.
You pretend to smile
At others who know what you did.
You play a role that elicits sympathy
From those who fail to see the real you.
You wear a mask of happiness,
You still prey on those who care.
After all the trials, tribulations,
Lies and sacrifices...
You still know not what I now know.
I know now how to love myself.
I know now how to wear a smile
Showing that I am truly happy.
I no longer pretend to be someone
I am not for the sake of others.
I know now that I need not cling
To others to be happy.
I now know that only I
Can love myself for who I truly am.
And it pains me to say
That you know not what I now know.
I look
At your tear-stained face
Your mouth, spouting those horrible
Words
Comments
Insults
Meant to hurt me
Break my bones
And yet
You know not what I now know
You haven't yet realized
I know
I know everything
All the others in our bed
You, keeping them company
You, who I thought was my everything
Now, in my pain
You are still my everything
I've come to find, though
That I was never yours.
Knowledge
You know not what I now know.
Ignorance is fatal,
Susceptible and naive.
Knowledge is torture,
Gnawing and heavy.
I sought greatness.
What are fame and fortune to a scholar?
I had questions,
I found answers.
Honesty breaks what lies do not,
Secrets were meant to be kept.
Like Frankenstein I pushed too far,
Like Caesar I fell.
Like Napoleon I met my end,
Like a king I lost my crown.
Knowledge was not meant for men,
A treasure to be sought.
Knowledge is the only thing,
That can unveil those truly corrupt.
i thought i knew but the more i know the less i think i know
You know not what i thought i knew long ago, but i now know that that is not what i thought i knew and that is that although i know substantially more in terms of quantity, i do not necessarily know more in terms of quality. What i mean to say is that i know that it's impossible to know all things about anything, but intrinsically, i aspire to know all things nonetheless realizing that for me to know all things would never bring me peace but rather torment. I therefore resolve to become as a little child wishing i had never tasted of the forbidden fruit; the fruit of the tree of knowledge, that is the knowledge of good and evil. I tasted by default and do taste daily, incidentally and hereby grow in knowledge of both in this cosmic dualism.
True. I know not what you now know and the same holds true in regard to my knowing that which i know you do not know of what i know either. Perhaps we are at an impasse. Perhaps what you know matters not to what i know and vice versa. And perhaps if we meet in the middle and share via communication, information pertaining to what each of us is willing to share with the other, we may grow in knowledge.
The ancient adage of ignorance being bliss is applicable in context of that not knowing, not exercising the freedom of will to, say murder, steal or cheat, that is to do hurtful things to oneself or to others, may offer a form of ignorance which could yield to me peace. However this state, in my opinion, is something less than true freedom being essentially akin to the conscienceness of a turnip or toad. Freedom of choice to do good or evil is liberating because herein is freedom to live in a world of both realms, the physical and spiritual, wherein good and evil resides in each and every lepiquark, neutrino, atom, matter and antimatter; in the conscience and breath of every living organism.
Every man is an island. Every man, every woman although they may live on the same island or even the same village or home, will never fully understand even their closest friend, spouse or twin . . . and for that matter as a point of further emphasis, even conjoined twins may never know or be able to perceive each other's feelings, thinking philosophical, or religious ponderings.
That is the most amazing, intriguing and fascinating thing about cognition: billions of homo sapiens have inhabited, have lived upon the earth past, present and will future, but like snowflakes in varietal differences of atomic structure, each is infinitely unlike all others that have been and ever shall be, so too, no living organism is exactly alike in physical appearance or in process of thought.
One may argue the point of my assumptive premise and challenge me to prove my awkward thesis, however i can readily reverse the tables as it were, and challenge such difference of opinion, theory or premise from one with an opposing viewpoint. My challenge in this case would be to prove me wrong.
Each individual upon this planet, is uniquely different. I am fully aware that i sound arrogantly narcissistic to any reader, even to myself. I realize that i sound stupidly ignorant because at this point there really isn't any scientific study to support my thesis embedded within the relative superficial lines contained in this essay. At risk of redundancy, there haven't been any scientific studies to disprove my premise either.
I'm sure many of us have peered through the lens of microscopes and or electron microscopes. Let's take any element. Are all its atoms exactly alike? The answer on its surface appears to be a resounding, yes. However, let's open up Pandora's lid a little wider, shall we? How about a Google search on the topic of quantum mechanics. Some particles bear the names like, "strange," "up," "love," etc. Ever hear of CERN? Perhaps here are a few topics for research that will further emphasize my point that no two objects are completely, perfectly alike.
Perhaps what i have just shared with you, dear reader is but another example of the precept that what i now know is not what you know. I totally and humbly acquiesce to the knowledge that you possess information of which i am totally unaware, (so does the military - i'm sure you've heard of NASA's face on Mars) . . . One can go in any direction with this sort of thing. Let me be frivolous - why so serious?
Do you suppose the indigenous peoples of Papua New Guinea or the Amazonian equatorial jungles know about Judge Judy or Beavis and Butt Head, or Jello? - (okay, I'm done).
You know not what i now know, nor do i know what you know outside your willingness to share. But most all of us know that even with the best of communication's skills regardless of language; there is no such thing as perfect skill in conveying thought relative to feelings. At best we have but an inkling of feel between ourselves. All earth societies are replete with misunderstanding, perhaps one indicative reason for warfare that is common to all of our species.
Each person endowed with intelligence, is aware that thought is novel, unique and creative in varying degrees. Do we as homo sapiens, (without even considering other intelligent forms of life like whales, primates, canines, yes, even insects, whether preying mantis' or any of the insect kingdom's myriad species) - do we care to know what other life forms are thinking? If we do, then we will be capable of greater levels of self and collective awareness. We will be able to choose to either be more enlightened by virtue of understanding the thought of other life species or carapace ourselves into our introverted shells thinking we have the knowledge of knowing, yet remain in relative oblivion when measured against the idea of the possibility of life forms that may reside in our universe.
By knowing what others know and allowing others to know what we know; we can grow. We can choose good over evil and grow more knowledgeable in what others know so that we might attain a greater knowledge of the truth. Knowing the truth by choice, and choosing to wield truth benevolently rather than malevolently, will allow us to know that whatever it is that is available to know will lead to more a more peaceful world. Tolerance for other's ideas or beliefs harbors and inculcates peace and enlightenment.