"OK we're in a tree. Why?"

"Have a drink."

"Jesus you guys really do carry it everywhere. Would you put your shirt back on please?"

"For a fat old man you climb well. Drink! Do you really grab them by the pussy?"

"Hagh. I need a chaser...Jesus. Sometimes."

"You are new to politics! I lie there and beckon them to molest me."

"That is certainly one to try, Vladimir. May I call you Vladimir?"

"We have drunk vodka together and talked of women. Now to business. I will pull out of Syria if you will scream like a chicken and fly from this tree."

"You're kidding."

"No I'm  serious.  Yell like a chicken and leap for the ground."

"No, you're testing me. You want to see how far you can push me."

"Well done old man! NATO is in good hands. "

"I have a counterproposal. You join NATO and we'll pull out of the UN."

"Ha ha ha!"

"Seriously."

"No no no. Now you are joking with me."

"How can you tell?"

"You didn't tweet about it first."

"Ouch."

"Aw, now I have offended! Save your wits for how you'll get down."

"Same as you I expect."

"No my friend, shirtless super Vlad will simply jump."

"Yeah?"

"Yes! And now AAAAH!"

"Ugh. Oh my God."

"Bloated idiot! You could have killed me!"

"Let that be lesson Putin. You never know when I'll pounce. Like a jungle cat. An ocelot? A jaguar. Pounce like a jaguar. Help me stand up."

"Soil yourself!"

"Aw come back! Gah. Still a better summit than Vienna. Foo. Gotta breathe a minute."

Donald and Putin sittin' in a tree

More conniving friends there never will be

"What can you do for me?", says orange haired Donny

"No, me. What can YOU do for me?" replies the Commie

First, comes self-serving attachments

Then, nuclear arms policy factions

Next, put in play corrupt political matters

While citizens become sadder and sadder

Again, their apparent union is suspect

As both nations' global security goes to heck

Mutual deniability, corruption accusations result

Apparently, no bad doings are either man's fault

Donald and Putin sittin' in a tree

Apparently, the joke and the horror is on me

And all!

Donald and Vladimir sitting in a tree,

First sharing stories of Misogyny. 

Putin beats his chest, pale and bare,

Trump runs his little hands through his hair.

"I make women in the army wear skirts"

was Putins boast. 

 "Well I grab women's pussies"

says the Apprentice host.

Then came some bragging about net worth,

Was it stolen or inherited at birth?

Putin says I make a modest salary,

and gives a wink,

Trump says I'm worth billions,  

that's what the people think. 

Then came the mutual ego strokes,

Pats on the back by good ol' blokes. 

So much boasting, hot air and bull,

a branch can't hold two heads that full. 

Donald and Putin sittin' in a tree

F-U-C-K-I-N-G

First comes discourse

Then comes hate

Then comes drivel: Make America Great!

Donald and Putin had a good fuck

Minorities: you'll need more then good luck

First comes rigging

Then comes the wall

Then comes the scapegoats to take the fall

Donald and Putin went to the altar

Shit spewing mouths never seeming to falter

First goes the immigrant

Then goes the fag

Then goes the pussy, locker talkin bout a shag

Donald and Putin gunna one day go to war

Cus Donald is soft; Putin's a power whore

First goes the bombs

Then goes the town

Then the economy is goin' down

Donald and Putin sittin' in a tree.

Just talking foreign policy.

He tweets and tweets and tweets some more.

While Putin stashes nukes galore.

Vlad kills dissenters and pisses on the ashes.

Donald is concerned with cheating on his taxes.

Pooty says he'll hack the DNC.

The Don says it's easy just grab 'em by the p*ssy.

While Time says Donald is the man of the year.

Putin knows there is more you'll fear.

Clinton's on the run, a sorry sad sack.

She should've let Bernie lead the attack.

For even a socialist would have got my vote.

I guess we are all f*cked, we're in the same boat.

Donald and Putin, sitting in a tree

M-I-S-S-I-N-G

First came drugs

then came the bag

then came a replacement so the votes won't drag.

That's not all, That's not all

Now their in my basement soaked in alcohol

Prepare to burn for your crimes

because I'm using the napalm slimes

prepare yourselves, because I'm not done

First I'll break your limbs, one by one!

We'll have such fun in my lair,

The police can't hear, it's just so fair

I'll put you in a chair, so you're so soothed,

but then you'll be awakened by your organs being removed

Now it's time for me to go

record this stuff and put on a show...

Have a good night...

Donald and Putin sitting in a tree, look out now, conspiracy!

Figure heads in your head and the media will seize, the right to the details on the real stories.

What's their angle?

I'm ready for their close up, 

Or an abrupt shut up of any and all news fronts, and the world for the first time in a very long one, can just deal with what, or who, is present, directly in front of them.

I may be dumb, but as for Trump and Putin,

 up in that tree,

Let's hope it is an olive branch they're sitting on, 

and 

for the sake of democracy, everyone is entitled 

to an opinion,

But you'll not hear one from me. No theories, or queries,

As care for such worries,

in me,

Has gone

"M-I-S-S-I-N-G".

Donald and Putin sittin’ in a tree.

K – I – S – S – I – N – G

First comes love, then comes hate

We’re all gonna make America Great!

Build that wall, make that call

Put up another shopping mall.

It’s no worry, we’re not in trouble

Let’s all live in a giant bubble.

Donald likes streaming, Putin likes eating

Our economy’s gonna take a beating.

You’re not worried, I’m not scared

I’d just rather be eatin by a bear.

But have no fear, our president is…… is……

is…… is…… is…… is…… is…… is…… is……

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is…… is…… is…… is…… is…… is…… is………………..

Donald and Vladimir, sitting in a tree

B-O-M-B-I-N-G

First goes Cuba

Then goes Bon

For the new world order from Moscow and Washington

Trump and Putin, in a settee

D-E-T-E-N-T-E

I'll take Europe

You take Asia

And everything north and east of Caucasia.

Mogul and Commie, becoming trustee

O-V-E-R-S-E-E

They sit as the only two

On the Board of Directors

Gitmo or Gulag for any defectors. 

He's orange and moppet with little fingers

The other's shirtless and hangs out with swingers

What about Africa?

What about the Moon?

Patience, Comrade, we'll divvy up soon.

Putin drinks vodka, Trump his OJ

M-I-M-O-Z-A

I'll toast you yes

You toast me da

Everyone's in, unless we say nah.