You know the feeling when you start thinking and just can't stop again

You fall into a tunnel that has no end because it had no start

You've always been here and there's no escape

It's just life and there's no choice but to keep living or die

No alternate option or restart button if you don't like the hand you drew

No option to stop thinking once you've started

You can train for years but your mind will never be empty, just shift in focus

I'm not scared to die but I'm scared that I'll never live again

This life will be the only one I ever have and what if I'm not doing enough with it

Then what if I just don't have as much potential as some other lives and I'm in a tunnel just thinking and thinking while other people are running free in vivid picture brains with infinite possibilities and my whole life is just one string of words until I remember their life is the only one they have too

I guess I'm mostly sad that this existence is the only one I'll ever get to know

I'll never get to grow up any other way than how I did

and I'll never look in the mirror and see any other face but mine

And the tunnel doesn't start and doesn't end

It's so full of everything I've experienced in my life but it never meets with any other tunnel

There will never be anything here seen by any eyes but mine and all the memories are colored by the same lens and all the wants are ones I determined for myself long ago and now they're so built in I can't just stop living the way I always have

I can stand still or walk or run but I can never leave

Even if I leave I won't be able to go anywhere else, see anyone else's existence, I'm just gone and that's it and my lonely tunnel will still be there, not that anyone would know because they can't see it, they're trapped in themselves too

Now I'm in bed and the world's moving around me and I'm up and moving too but I'm still stuck here

I want to leave and know something else but this is all I'll ever know

These stone walls of memories, these flashes of desires, always the empty spaces where there should be doors leading to other tunnels

Let us know each other

Please

Nothing.

I guess I have nothing to do but keep going with this life that's mine

Keep trying to find my way into other people's realities, keep knowing I'll never really make it, just like they can't see mine

Please come in, I want you to know me

Let our lives intersect

Twine as close as they can

They'll never touch and never trade lenses but they can tint each other with the other’s color

Reduce aur pollution

Reduce motor vehicles usage

Reduce strong cleaning chemicals

Use non toxic paints

Use plants that exhale oxygen even in night

Quit smoking

#saveearth

Hello there,

My name is Lisa. I am 25 years old. And I have psychic abilities. I am at the point in my life where my soul, mind and body are ready to open up to this. It would take me hours to write how I came to this point. But I can describe the context as it is now. I reached a sense of inner peace that has been present for months now. Not only that, I also moved to the north of Norway two and a half weeks ago. Away from the overstimulating city, and reunited with my love, the northern nature. Pretty soon after I arrived, I started to get some hints. That now was the time. That I had reached the level of *readiness* that is required for the next stage in my journey.

Lately, I've been expressing my personal and spiritual journey more in the online space, particularly Instagram and YouTube. But what's currently happening inside of me, requires focus. It's a vulnerable topic, that is believed by few, and I cannot let external energy seep into this part of my journey. That's what I learned today when I shared the topic with my brother and my mother. With people who are there with a lot of love, but who are not there in spiritually. I understand them. The skepticism, the unbelief. They are particularly skeptical because I am entering an online Soul Alignment program with a channeler and energy-healer that costs quite a lot of money, to say the least. So they are afraid that the money won't outweigh the value of the program. But how can I explain that I know with my whole soul that this is the right program for me? I can't. Or, I can, and I did, but that doesn't sound particularly convincing to them. Which I fully and completely understand. It hasn't been too long ago - maybe about four years - that I still believed that when we die, we rot in a our grave, and that's it. That people who believed in spirituality and religion were a bit naive. So who am I to judge people who judge? We have our own beliefs. We are in different stages of the spiritual journey. Plus, there are different things to awaken to, depending on your soul's journey and purpose. Some wake up to extraterrestrial beings. Some wake up to the spirits of the dead. Some follow a more shamanistic path. Others go the Buddhist way. My closest soulfriend and I recently took distance because we are both awakening seriously and we are here with a strong purpose. She takes the Buddhist path, and I, well, I don't think I can put it in a few words, and I have yet to discover what the heck is about to happen in my journey. But, yeah, nature, the spirit realm and energy healing are involved. So that sounds quite shamanistic doesn't it? But, I can't and I won't put my journey in a box. I do not like boxes, they are limiting.

So as I was saying, by talking to my closest family about this very delicate topic, I let external energy inside. What do I mean with that? Every thought and emotion carries electromagnetic energy. Energy is information. After having talked with them, their beliefs are tangible inside my mind and body, disconnecting me from my inner knowing, disturbing my energy, confusing my mind, and blurring my vision. Because this is not an easy journey. It takes me a lot of courage and going through the fire of anxiety to push through with this. I do not have another option, and I think that is something that people who are not going through a spiritual awakening, have a hard time understanding. Yes there is this top-down process where I have the mindset to grow and to awaken as much as possible. But also that, is driven by a strong bottom-up force that has been driving my journey all along. It's like taking a decent dose of psychedelics. It's not like *you* go on the journey. The psychedelic takes you on the journey. Just like the awakening takes me on this journey. And this part of my awakening...dear lord. My ego is shaking her head: "Spirit guides? Angels? Akashic records reading? Psychic abilities? Really? Could it *get* more spiritual?"

And my soul is saying: "I am sorry babes, but yes, it can get more spiritual. You better surrender, cause we have a lot in store for you." "Oh my", my ego says.

I am going all in. And again, this is as much a conscious choice as it is just the force inside of me that is pulling me to that which has to be done. But for this part of my journey, I have to close the door to others. However, I still feel a strong urge to document this journey and share it somewhere. So I thought, why not use my dear account on Prose? Where I can share anything, and at the same time be invisible.

It so happens that I had a little surgery on my foot and that I cannot work for ten days. I have to "rest". Divine timing. What happens when a person is forced to rest? One has to surrender to the feminine. Being, feeling, sensing. And what resides in the divine feminine? Magic. I thanked the universe when I heard that I should not walk on my foot too much for ten days. I looked in the mirror, and smiled, "I know what to do".

I came home from the hospital, sat down in my bed, and typed into the YouTube search bar: "Open up psychic abilities meditation". I did a few meditations and went to sleep with a happy heart. One hour later, I started to hear many birds, ravens more specifically, through my right ear. The exact ear where I felt a kind of stingy sensation during one of the meditations. My whole face trembled from the inside out, as if I am channeling an animal, kind of like a lion or a bear that is roaring. I also started to see some images, I don't remember them quite well because they were vague. But it had to do with nature and I saw a lake.

I realized that I had to completely surrender this time. These kinds of phenomena are not entirely unfamiliar to me. I finally understood why I've been experiencing sleep-paralysis since 2018 and trippy dreams since last year. It is because I am psychic, and information tries to come through me.

My foot starts to really hurt now. The anesthesia is wearing off. What were the doctors thinking to not send me home with painkillers? I have these light paracetamol pills. Maybe I should take a few, and try to fall back asleep.

Either way I think I am about done with writing for today. You will hear more from me. Writing about this is very therapeutic. My first official session of the Soul Alignment program is November 26th. But I think a lot is going to happen in between.

I am going to leave you for now, and I send you much love, because you took the time to read all the way to here <3.

Will be continued...

Sit down and shut up

Do not doubt anything

Proceed exactly as you’re told

For we control everything

The government values obedience

Conform without question

Stay in lockstep with society

There’s no freedom of expression

Change starts with self awareness

Defy the foundations of normality

Begin to think and act for yourself

Be free to create your own reality

The rulers demand ideological compliance

But self awareness occurs from cultivated thought

We need to stay sovereign amongst the chaos

Or the fight to be free will be for naught

Growing up is knowing that

No one knows what's going on

We're all in pain

And we're all failing at it.

Growing up is knowing that

You are not your emotions

You are a soul, living in a mortal body

With emotions that pass through you

Growing up is learning that

We are all trying to do the best we can

With different problems

That no one but you and G-d

Will ever fully know

Growing up is learning that

You have a choice

To let your pain lead you

Or to lead your pain

As Kahlil Gibran would say

The bowl that overflows with milk and honey

Is the same bowl that was hollowed with knives

Growing up is knowing that

You are not alone

Because we're all fucked

It's the weight of words left unspoken,

the ache of reaching across miles that swallow sound.

Every night, I send pieces of myself

quiet confessions, invisible threads

hoping they find you whole.

But distance is a thief,

a silent cut I can't name,

and though I hold you close in the hollow of my chest,

I'm haunted by how far love can stretch

before it breaks.

Late at night I can’t help but wonder

Did the world forget me?

When the only relief is affection by my own hand I can’t help but wonder.

Did the world forget me?

Always the bridesmaid never the bride

Always the lover never the loved

When did the world forget me?

With an aching heart and an empty bed

A wish to be held locked in in my head

Why did the world forget me?

Broken hearts hurt more then slit wrist

Broken sobs, remains of a dead wish

Why can‘t I forget me?

I dramatically throw open my arms. "Do you get it now" I shout as they look around in horror. "What are those" they ask tentatively pointing at the multitude of strings crisscrossing the landscape. "Oh those are my special connections. You've heard of all roads lead to Rome. This is my version, all strings reveal everything is my fault." "That... That's not possible" They stammer. "Of course it is just watch". I walk them down the path showing how my actions or lack thereof caused everything that's wrong in my vicinity. I can see them listening intently as I make my case. I think I've proven my point when they give me a strange look. "You know none of that is on you right" I shake my head at their well intentioned nonsense. Obviously they are just trying to be kind to such a screwup. I pat them sympathetically on the back as I explain once again how I'm to blame for everything wrong in the world. Eventually I'll bring them around, one day they'll understand. Neither of us are going anywhere until I do.

The device hums to life, and in an instant, reality dissolves. I blink, and when my eyes open, I’m standing inside a vast, shifting landscape—a surreal world of memories, dreams, and fears woven together. Fragmented scenes from my life float in bubbles around me, like windows into the past. Each bubble is different: one glows warmly with childhood memories, while others pulse with the haunting shadows of mistakes and regrets.

Beside me is Dr. Hale, the neuroscientist who built this device. I agreed to try it because I thought confronting my innermost self might bring me closure, help me untangle what I could never understand. But now that we’re here, I feel exposed, as if every secret I’ve ever kept is about to be laid bare.

Suddenly, the path shifts, and towering doors appear, each leading to different parts of my mind: Memories, Fears, Desires, Regrets. Dr. Hale urges me to choose, and we step through a door marked Fears. Inside, it’s dark, cold, and oppressive—a maze of shadowed corridors with whispers echoing around us. I realize that to escape, we’ll have to face each door, navigate every room.

But as we walk deeper, it dawns on me—there’s no exit until I accept what I find here. Dr. Hale and I need to piece together each memory, confront each fear, and unravel every regret if we’re ever going to make it out.

It’s not just a journey into the mind—it’s a journey through everything I am. And the only way to escape is to face myself completely.